Am I right to be annoyed by this? (Cultural appropriation?)

[TheincredibleBookEatingManchot]

Or maybe I don't have the right to be annoyed?

A couple I know who are white British have named their dog a Sanskrit word, which is used in Hinduism and Buddhism. Also the woman wore a bindi at their wedding. Maybe it's just because I don't like this couple anyway so anything they do annoys me but I feel weirdly personally annoyed and kind of bitter about it.

I am ethnically half Indian but culturally completely white British and my Indian family were all Christians (and now atheists) so I have no claim on anything Indian/Hindu/Buddhist; it's not my culture they're appropriating.

But still I kind of feel like if I named my pet a word from an Indian language or started wearing bindis then my Britishness, my belonging in this country would be called into question, but this couple, with their pale skin and light hair are secure in their Britishness, no one's going to start questioning their identity or tell them to go "back" to India, so they get to use things from Indian culture to make themselves look interesting and exotic.

And I don't. But I don't want to. So am I unreasonable to be annoyed at them?

I don't think I've expressed myself very well but not really sure how to make myself clear.

Quite possibly I am unreasonable and this has nothing to do with me.

@WorraLiberty To be fair, it is one of French's better words! And we don't have one for that ourselves.

@AdobeWanKenobi
You have the best name on this thread!!

@Tombliwho you've just assumed that everyone saying it's not cultural appropriation is white. Are only white people guilty of cultural appropriation?

They can do what they want and anyone can adopt any culture or part of a culture they want to.
If they are making themselves look like tits because of it, then that's their lookout.

@sparklesocks not necessarily! OP has openly admitted to not liking them, and it not being OP's culture, so I very much doubt that she would be privvy to information such as their religious beliefs.

OP would know if she was a practicing Hindu and wouldn’t post about it surely?

Not necessarily. I’ve known couples for years before I found out their religion. Especially the couples that are mixed religion.

Cultural appropriation because they name their dog something or other? Are you serious?

@Retroflex well obviously if she’s a practicing Hindu then that’s a different story, but it seems from the OP (aka the only info we have to go on) that she isn’t.

This thread has made me remember a party I went to 17 years ago when I was 15. I and four friends all wore bindis, a salwar kameez and a headscarf. Myself and one of the other girls are white and I feel like if that party happened today we probably wouldn't dare to wear those things for fear of being accused of this.

I think YABU. One of my pets names is a Sanskrit word. I'm white Welsh. I chose it because of its meaning in Hinduism which was very pertinent to her experiences before I rescued her. I don't see it as much different to someone calling a chihuahua Pepe.

Nowt to do with you. Butt out of their business and stop being sensitive.

YABU because there's no such bloody thing as 'cultural appropriation'.

It’s a bit naff and given the UK’s colonial past with India I would also feel uncomfortable with it.

I've also worn a saree (to a ball) and a shalwar kameez (christening). They're just beautiful clothes to me. I was sat next to an Indian gentleman at the ball, and apart from hampering his attempts to pull, because everyone thought I was his wife, I don't think he was offended by my attire!

@paranoidmum2 "Sanskrit word, which is used in Hinduism and Buddhism. Also the woman wore a bindi at their wedding."

to me this is suggesting that at least one of the couple follow Hinduism or Buddhism

Isn’t it nice to admire other cultures, countries and religions rather than dislike them?

I think whatever this woman does you’ll hate it.

YANBU. I'm Indian and agree with you. It's as if white peoples think they do it better when they appropriate a culture. So they can don dreadlocks but appear cool, instead of understanding the whole history behind that culture. If they had just called their pet by a Hindu name I would have been fine, but the wearing of a bindi just adds a level of weird, that takes it into the realm of cultural appropriation.

A friend's child in the US was told by his school that he couldn't dress as a frat boy for Halloween as it was cultural appropriation 🤯

It's as if white peoples think they do it better when they appropriate a culture. So they can don dreadlocks but appear cool, instead of understanding the whole history behind that culture.

What makes you assume 'instead of' rather than 'as well as'?

@Mistlewoe are you Indian, or are you British and of Indian heritage? OP said she's half Indian but 'culturally white British'. I'm not even sure what that means but surely that if anything is cultural appropriation?

Britain is incredibly culturally diverse. Not all white people have the same culture.

@mistlewoe the Celts (Scotland) historically wore their hair with elaborate curls or braids...

MrsEricBana I had to Google frat boy to make sure it meant what I thought it did! That is ridiculous.

Any thoughts on the 70+ replies so far OP?

I don't like this couple anyway so anything they do annoys me but I feel weirdly personally annoyed and kind of bitter about it....it's not my culture they're appropriating...So am I unreasonable to be annoyed at them?

Yes. Hugely.

Why would a white woman wear a bindi? I’d have laughed at her.

Do you laugh at non-white people wearing suits? There is only one word for someone who mocks people based on skin colour.

Cultural appropriation is a real thing and if you ever had to experience the negatives of it then you wouldn't say that.

I think it is, however I think shit like this has almost made the phrase meaningless. It's impossible to discuss cultural appropriation as a phenomenon when it's used as a stick to beat individuals with, over the most insane things.

Isn’t it nice to admire other cultures, countries and religions rather than dislike them?

It's not 2014 any more, we aren't allowed to do that. Don't you read the Guardian?

@AdobeWanKenobi My Scottish dog has an Irish name. He seems ok with this though could explain why he ignores it half the time.

I call you out for cultural appropriation, just take a look at your user name - I assume you are part Jedi/part Spanish?

I think you need to look at why you feel so bitter about it OP. Do you feel removed from your cultural heritage? Would you like to be able to immerse yourself in it more without judgement? Are you simply envious of people who seem not to have any insecurities about their own culture? Maybe concentrate on unpicking it. You can’t change them but you can change how you think about it.

I do know someone with an Indian mother who has a British name and looks white, so it might be that they are not really appropriating anything.