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AIBU?

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Original poster

Potty in pub

162 replies

Mammyloveswine · 07/01/2020 15:39

Went out for lunch with a friend today, went to a family friendly pub for lunch as has a new baby and i have a toddler.

A group were sat on the next table with older toddlers who were pottering around a little play area.

Anyway one of the toddlers went over to their mum and said she needed a wee. The mother then got a potty out from under the pram and popped it on the floor where the toddler promptly sat on it and had a wee! We were eating at the time!

I couldn't help myself saying "you know there's a toilet right there and they have a little seat for toddlers?" She looked at me and said "oh do they? Well I've got this as this is what she is used to!". I wish I'd said something about people eating but I was just astounded! She then went to the toilet to empty the potty!

I'm just shocked that someone would let their child use a potty where people are eating!! No one else in the group batted an eyelid!

Is this a thing? When I potty trained my eldest we stayed in a few days until he could hold it in enough to make it to an actual toilet! I certainly never carted a potty round with me!

I could understand taking a potty to use in the actual toilets but to use it in the middle of the pub!!Shock

Anyone else experienced this? I wouldn't change a nappy in the middle of a pub so definitely wouldn't let my child use a potty!

OP posts:
Spitsandspots · 07/01/2020 16:18

Disgusting.
I thought the woman stood next to me, at the customer service desk in Tesco was awful enough for putting a potty down and letting her daughter pee, but whilst people are eating Shock

Didn’t a member of staff see & say anything to her?

Letsallscreamatthesistene · 07/01/2020 16:18

disgusting.

I genuinely think people forget that toddlers going to the toilet in the middle rooms on potties isnt accepted when out and about. Fine in your own home, not fine when in public spaces,

Rosebel · 07/01/2020 16:18

That's disgusting and would be enough to put me off eating. I took the potty everywhere when I was potty training but we always went in the toilet to use it. I just assumed everyone did.
You definitely weren't rude.

ThunderGarlic · 07/01/2020 16:19

YANBU. I have a relative who carries a potty wherever they go so her two LOs (both under 4) can pee and poo whenever and wherever. The rest of the family are bemused by this and take kids to the toilets (or the bushes if outside and desperate). Apparently all her mum-friends do the same thing, taking potties everywhere, all the time. Aside from teaching the appropriate places and situations for these bodily functions, I don't think I could be bothered carting round a great lump of plastic everywhere.

ChocolateCoins19 · 07/01/2020 16:19

My response wouldn't of been so restrained. I'd of told them it Was bloody disgusting

ThunderboltandLightning · 07/01/2020 16:19

I actually think the mother's response was far more rude than the OP.

Part of toilet training is teaching them to hd on for the few seconds/minute it takes to get to a loo and pull pants down. If they are still in the no flash to bang phase, then really you need to stay close to home for a few days until they have cracked it.

AvaSnowdrop · 07/01/2020 16:19

Some people are disgusting. Thankfully I’ve only seen it happen once, in a cafe where a mother pulled out a potty and encouraged her DC to shit on it while people were eating. Everyone else I’ve encountered has had decent manners.

Rosebel · 07/01/2020 16:20

Actually you should have asked the woman if she'd like to go and eat her food in the toilet. But that is being rude.

Crazycactuslady · 07/01/2020 16:20

Bleurgh!!!

I was in a shop the other day and a young boy - probably about 6 - said to his mum 'I need a wee'... She opened the front door of the shop and sent him out into the car park Confused like you would if a pet stood by the door Shock Kid peed in the car park in full view! Shop had a customer loo!!

What the hell is wrong with some people?!

curious86 · 07/01/2020 16:21

I work in a barbers and we had a family come in, whilst their son was having his hair cut their daughter needed the toilet. We dont have toilet facilities for customers but thets a cage and department store attached to us and we recommend them. But no the mum wants to get the potty out in the middle of the shop (we're not a high shop) and let her daughter have a wee.
It was uncomfortable for our customers and I dont agree with letting children use the potty in front of strangers.

NoIDontWatchLoveIsland · 07/01/2020 16:21

I've got one of those folding potties (with the bags...) but i thought they were for situations where there are no facilities and little children cant be expected to last ages and ages.... big country parks, long car journeys. Not pubs!!

BlueJava · 07/01/2020 16:25

That's gross, not surprised you said something. Urgh!!!

HairyString · 07/01/2020 16:27

Fucking hell! That is beyond grim and I would have given her lot more than you did OP. Christ on a bike, what is wrong with people?

StoneofDestiny · 07/01/2020 16:29

Repulsive behaviour - you were very restrained in what you said!

Tombliwho · 07/01/2020 16:30

Disgusting. The pp who thinks you're rude probably thinks it's acceptable behaviour.

TobyeBella · 07/01/2020 16:32

I used to work in an art gallery and remember someone just pulling out a potty and sitting their child on it in the middle of the exhibition.

We told them where the toilet was, didn't care. I wasn't a parent then and have actually recently trained DS but I don't think I'd take him in somewhere like that if I thought he couldn't wait.

unlikelytobe · 07/01/2020 16:34

Have a word with the landlord. Maybe he'll put up a sign explaining all urinating, potty or otherwise , must be done in the WC.

Is that mother dense/entitled/disrespectful or all three?

bpirockin · 07/01/2020 16:34

I've seen posts where people have done similar in restaurants etc. If I'd paid to go out for a meal and saw this, I'd be disgusted and expect staff to ensure that they were told it was unacceptable.

I think it is rude and lazy. Surely part of potty training is to get to and do it in an appropriate place. Fortunately I've never witnessed such behaviour, I'm not sure what I'd say but I'm pretty sure it would be very similar to what the OP said.

Sparklingbrook · 07/01/2020 16:36

There's just no need. Toilet training is to get them prepared for real life using the toilet. Which isn't sitting on a potty whenever, wherever.

I managed to bring up two DC without a potty at all, I think they are horrible things.

I don't know whether I would have had the nerve to confront her.

Greenpolkadot · 07/01/2020 16:36

Dirty mare. Why couldn't she take the potty to the toilet and let the kid use it in there

Drum2018 · 07/01/2020 16:37

YABU and rude to what you said to her.

In no way was the op unreasonabale or rude. If that happened while I was eating I'd have made a total show of the parents. It's disgusting and unnecessary, not to mention totally undignified for the child, when there are toilets available in restaurants/cafes.

WhenOneDoorClosesAnotherOpens · 07/01/2020 16:40

Yuck! Surely with all the health and safety these days, peeing or pooing in the middle of a restaurant is not allowed? I don't think what you said was rude OP. I don't know what I would have said if I'd seen it tbh.

How do you eventually teach children to use a toilet if they are used to whipping out a potty and going wherever they like? Confused

Aridane · 07/01/2020 16:42

Some people are just potty (groan)

Nanny0gg · 07/01/2020 16:44

I can't believe you didn't complain to the pub staff!

Aridane · 07/01/2020 16:44

The way you said it was rude. That's my opinion, you posted on AIBU you can't expect everyone to agree with you

Yes - because pointing out the location of the toilet and specifically that it has children's seats is clearly grossly unreasonable, irresponsible and offensive

Hmm
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