To feel embarassed/ashamed of what I do for a living?

[Exvagabond]

I'm currently working as a cleaner at £10/hour with an agency in London. I've never cleaned professionally until a few months ago, but I was desperate to find work to support my family.

Whenever someone asks me what I'm doing, I tell them and you can just tell by the look on their face that they don't approve almost as if they feel sorry for me. Why does my job make people uncomfortable?

I dont have to work, my partner supports me but I see it like this;

-My DD (4) gets 30 hours at nursery, socialising with other children and learning what I don't have the time to teach her at home

• I'm bringing money in to the household so that we can put money away for emergencies, a holiday, days out etc.

• I'm putting money in to a private pension

• I'm paying tax

• On top of this I'm a part time student, so I won't do this forever

Why am I scum to some people?

All I can say is that you are not scum to me, @Exvagabond. You are working, contributing to society, and performing a service which I have no doubt your clients value. I have cleaners coming in once a month, to clean downstairs for me - once that's done, I can keep on top of the rest of it, but I cannot tell you how much it means to me to know that two wonderful ladies are going to spend a couple of hours here and leave my home looking so lovely.

I believe that everyone deserves respect - from the CEO down to the cleaner. I wouldn't dream of speaking to a checkout assistant any differently to how I would speak to the managing director - politely and in a friendly way.

People doing ordinary jobs are keeping society working. It doesn't matter how many CEOs and entrepreneurs you have - if there are no refuse collectors or cleaners or care assistants or shop workers (to name but a few), everything would grind to a halt!

Could be worse, you could be a politician. Seriously, the cleaner we had when our DC were small was one of the most formidable, hard working and caring women I have ever met, and I was lucky to count her as a friend. Anyone who looks down on someone doing an honest job for honest pay is a knob in my opinion.

you are student - presumably you'll be working in whatever area you are studying when you finish

But this is also effectively judging a cleaner’s role. You’re saying o/p is too good for it as a student and will be moving on as soon as she finds something “better”. Making cleaners with no other opportunities beneath her too? You only clean if you have no other choice or it is temporary...

Yes it’s an entry level job and doesn’t require great qualifications. But whatever the reason people choose to be cleaners it doesn’t make them less than.

As pp have said without cleaners the world but be a shit heap. Esp. Hospitals, cafe’s, public toilets etc, we’d be back in the days of infectious diseases spreading unchecked.

I don’t particularly care why people are cleaners, they deserve respect for doing a good job, like everyone else.

You are not scum and sorry if some people act that way. If you told me you are a professional cleaner I may give a 'look', not because I see you as 'lesser' but because I feel sympathy for you having to clean up after people, particularly as some people are filthy (e.g. you hear stories of how badly people will leave a hotel room knowing that someone else will tidy it up). Hopefully you are just mis-interpreting the 'look'.

My little sister set herself up as a cleaner following her divorce. As a now single mum she wanted to be able to drop her kids at school and pick them up and her profession wasn’t enabling that. She has had an awful time of it over recent years but the way she just got on with sorting her life out for her kids, well, to me she’s a bloody hero and I’m super proud of her. In fact, I don’t tell her that enough so I shall go and do that now.

Nothing wrong with that in the slightest. Even a little bit.

I clicked YABU but I meant well. You are unreasonable to not value yourself or your work. What you are doing is valuable. There is no such thing as unskilled work. I know people can be very snobby and yes they do look down sometimes. I used to be a high earner on a full time wage, now I'm a carer and do paid work for a charity part time. (I'm a SAHP because my work is home based). There's a massive difference to how people viewed me then to how they view me now. I don't think I am less happy now than I was then, if anything I'm more content now as the job was a high flying one but a lot more stressful.

You are doing a great job! You shouldn’t feel bad at all

Cleaning is vital and important work, as such it should be better paid!
roll up your sleeves and be proud!

i think some snobbish people 'would' sadly look down on you as being a cleaner. Their issue not yours.

You could say you have your own cleaning company - which is partly true, a white lie, maybe that'd get the judgy people off your back.

You can call yourself "interior technician" or something - there are plenty of new fancy names for jobs.

I think your job is a very effective snob filter, OP! Just announce your occupation and watch the response - you can instantly spot who to avoid in future! Think of all the time you save, not having to socialise with sneery types who despise an honest day’s work. And it immediately picks up decent people who will value you as a human, not despise you as some lesser breed. They’re the ones who could become good friends.

My mum went back to work as a cleaner once me and my DSis went to school after being a SAHM.
She worked hard, saved, and ended up as a small business owner within a few years. When she retired she sold her business as a going concern and is now very comfortably retired on the back of it.

A good friend of mine is also a cleaner, single mum, works very hard, no qualifications above GCSE and pays for childcare. Yes she does get some benefits as she is on NMW, but she has the work ethic and she will go far (so will her DD).

Well if you told me you were a cleaner and we were in my house I'd probably look embarrassed... Because it's a bit filthy . But I wouldn't think any less of you than if you were a doctor or decorator.

Nothing shameful in being a cleaner. I noticed a big difference in reactions from when I worked in finance to when I was teaching. Some jobs are seen as more prestigious - usually the best paid, last useful ones!

And for the poster who sees this as a British problem: my African and Indian friends were far more baffled by my step 'down' to teaching than my British friends, with very few exceptions. Many were appalled and thought my family must be very embarrassed!

Anyone who sneers or looks down on someone because of how they put food on their table is an arsehole and you needn't bother yourself trying to impress those types; they'll always find something to pick fault with.

You're working hard, studying and raising DC. You have nothing to be ashamed or concerned about.

I would never look down on someone working as a cleaner.

You are working, you are contributing so long as it is legal you're doing great!!!

I would never judge anyone for working ANY job. I would however judge someone ABLE to work, making the decision to NOT work.
What you are doing is earning, for your family, plus studying, plus being a mum. You're doing more than most and should be damn proud of yourself.

Years ago, when I was a student at a Christian bible college, I was shocked at the attitude some of the other students about the cleaners. They didn't wash up their cups in the student centre kitchen, saying that that was what the cleaners were there for. They also didn't pay what they owed in the honesty box, where we were supposed to pay for tea and chocolates.

In the end, they had to make it a 'tuck shop' managed by another student. It was disappointing to think some of the students had so little respect for the cleaners, who had come as volunteers from other countries. A lot of the students were hoping to become church leaders as well.

Sadly, I'm not in the least surprised you've experienced this, OP.

So sorry you feel like this op. You don't have to justify your job, but I'm sorry you feel like you do. Definitely use it as a way to filter out the nice from the nobs!

Why would you be embarrassed? You are earning more than some whilst doing a lot of other stuff on the side. You should be proud of yourself.
I work in social care and I get sideways looks for that (less now im a manager but when I was entry level) don't give a jot what anyone else things really.

I have a cleaner, she earns more than me - nobody should look down on anyone (I'm really bad at cleaning so work extra to pay for it)

Definitely don't be ashamed. Although i do think you should look at becoming self employed and find private house's to clean. I'm sure you could get £15-£20 in London. I clean a private house outside of London and get £12 an hour. Plays havoc with the knees though.

YABU There is nothing wrong with being a cleaner. In answer to your question Why am I scum to some people?

Its because they are wankers, end of. If a job wasnt important it wouldnt exist.

Being the amount of cleaning accounts on insta, I think you are on trend. If you don't mind it ,it is probably one of the better jobs out there .