Who is BU?

[Duchessgummybuns]

Child needs glasses for everyday wear, however they haven’t had any since August as they either broke or lost them (story keeps changing)

Resident Parent and NRP do not get on. RP sends message for child to relay saying if NRP wants child to have glasses NRP will have to collect them from opticians as they are working on the day they will be in.

NRP works long full time hours in a town 45 minutes away on a good day, and only has child EOW, so if the optician needs to fit them it will be another two weeks before child can wear the glasses (if they post them to the opticians in their town). NRP is inclined to tell RP this is their responsibility as RP, however if RP insists they will sort it out if necessary even though it will take longer so child can have glasses.

Who is being Unreasonable?

Poor kid

Disgraceful behaviour from both parties, my dc has glasses and has never been without them for even a day, i like my child to be able to see properly.

Get a second pair, my opticians have always made sure we have 2 pairs, both using vouchers so no cost.

Stop with the childish behaviour and someone pick the bloody glasses up so the child's eyesight is protected!

The important factor here is that the child needs glasses, not who should or should not be picking them up. Go and get the glasses and stop using your child as a pawn in your point scoring game with your ex. Honestly, arguing over who should do less for their child, that's pathetic. My poor eyesight was neglected by my mother (father had passed away) and lead to me having a terrible time at school - I couldn't read the blackboard!

Oh just grow up and get the glasses FFS.

Neither of you. You're both amazing parents

I call you're the partner of NRP.

I also call all 3 of YABU.

This should have been sorted in August when, presumably, the child was available for glasses fitting for pretty much the whole month

NRP has been asking after glasses since they turned up missing, but RP has refused to discuss it.

RP will not allow contact with child outside court order EOW so if NRP collects glasses in the week child will still not have them for another 2 weeks. Yes it is that pathetic and I’m on the outside of the situation tearing my hair out. NRP feels whatever they do in this situation will be wrong according to RP.

In that case NRP should get them. If they've without since August then 2 more weeks isn't a big deal. FFS

Poor kid. If they need to wear glasses they should have them. This is quite neglectful.

Both parents need to focus on what is best for this Child, who urgently needs glasses.

If the resident parent won’t collect them, the the non resident parent should.

NRP could do with reading up on their parents responsibility.

Is there a court order in place?

Does it specifically order that NRP cannot attend school during the week? Collect the glasses, drop them to school, get a proper fitting on next weekend.

Find a solicitor and sort out decent contact.

If RP really can't get to the opticians with the child, can they get there without? Then send child with specs on next visit to NRP, who can take them into the nearest branch to check fitting.

If NRP collects glasses in the week child will still not have them for another 2 weeks. Well the child has been struggling for 5 MONTHS so another couple of weeks won't make much difference!

Both shockingly unreasonable and neglecting child's needs!

Wtf.

So they’ve been arguing for 5 months about this at the expense of their child’s health, wellbeing and education?

The things you read on Mumsnet 🤦🏼‍♀️

Both parents need to grow the hell up and sort this out. Pathetic.

What is this "if NRP wants child to have glasses" thing. Does RP not agree with the need for glasses, is NRP insisting on glasses that RP thinks are unnecessary?

Both as bad as each other, even if NRP takes 2 weeks to get them they could have been picked up in September. And passing messages through the child is absolutely horrendous.

Both vvvvv unreasonable.

How can any of them leave the child without glasses? Just take the fucking time off, FGS.

I'd guess that RP has already sorted out everything else and is usually the one to take time off, though.
On that basis, I'd tell NRP to parent up and sort it out.

If RP is such an arse the NRP should take a day/half day off work taking child out of school if needs be to remedy this. If they don't they are as much an arse as the RP.

Both parents need to grow up and put the child first.

Whoever of them you speak to (NRP, probably), tell them that the child is more important than any of this crap.

get them today, the child will probably get them quicker that way, even if they have to wait 2 weeks.

Both parents were unreasonable to ever have a child.

Why can't NRP collect the glasses and drop them off with RP?

Some things are too precious to make a point of.

Just get the damn glasses.

How can two parents be this crap?

The pair of them need to grow the fuck up and get the child some glasses