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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

customer told me I was miserable as sin.

161 replies

loserlily · 31/12/2019 15:51

Feel very pathetic. Working in retail over Christmas during the Uni break.

On my shift, a woman in her 60s comes to the till. I serve her, and she snaps at me "I said I didnt want a bag!". I say sorry, take the bag off her purchase and carry on. After this, I didn't make an conversation with her, like I normally do, because she seems impatient and not wanting to talk.

She then decides she wants the bag, so I pass her it.

She snaps at me "are you having a bad day?" I said no.

She then shouts loudly "well you look as miserable as bloody sin". Grabs her receipt off me and leaves the shop.

I could feel my cheeks burning up, and my lip start doing that stupid wobbling thing. Had to carry on serving the next customer, who heard.

I feel pathetic for getting upset. AIBU to think she treated me like a piece of shit? Or is this an okay thing to say?

OP posts:
NoMorePoliticsPlease · 31/12/2019 15:53

How very rude. She should try working in retail

Brimful · 31/12/2019 15:53

She was very rude, don't take it to heart - I can't believe how rude some customers can be to staff.

MsChnandlerBong · 31/12/2019 15:54

She treated you like a piece of shit. Sorry OP.

WorraLiberty · 31/12/2019 15:54

I'm pretty sure you know it's not an ok thing to say.

It sounds like she thought you got the arse with her over the bag situation.

It happens, I'd put it out of your mind. She was rude to you and you can bet your life if asked, she'd say she thought you were rude to her.

2020cominatcha · 31/12/2019 15:55

You poor thing. I used to work retail and some people are just so horrible. I’ve had some dreadful things said to me so I can relate Flowers

LadyTiredWinterBottom2 · 31/12/2019 15:55

She's the miserable one. Flowers

forkfun · 31/12/2019 15:55

People can be so nasty. Even IF you weren't smiley or incredibly friendly (and I'm not saying you weren't) she had no right to be this rude. Don't let it get to you. It's her, not you.

Neolara · 31/12/2019 15:56

Some people are just mean and take out their negative emotions on others. You were unfortunate enough to get in her way today. It's not you. It really is her.

NotYourHun · 31/12/2019 15:56

The only thing you have to do is your job in a , polite, efficient fashion. You are not required to be jolly.

FudgeBrownie2019 · 31/12/2019 15:56

You get people like this in shops sometimes and it's nothing to do with you; you could be happier than bloody santa and they'd still find fault. Fuck her and her rudeness.

I hate, hate when people are unkind to anyone in customer facing jobs; it's the lowest type of bullying because you know they can't argue back so simply have to sit there listening to the verbal assault. It's scummy.

TyneTeas · 31/12/2019 15:57

This website can be quite therapeutic for retail workers Flowers

notalwaysright.com/

Todaythiscouldbe · 31/12/2019 15:57

That's horrible. She clearly has never worked in retail or any other service role over Christmas. I make an extra effort to chat and generally be nice to shop/restaurant staff over christmas as I'm sure they'd rather be home with their families than serving stressed and irritable customers

heartsonacake · 31/12/2019 15:57

I’m a manager in a customer based environment (not retail but similar). If I ever hear customers take a rude tone with my staff I will interject with “Is everything okay?” and usually that retreats them back into behaving like a civilised human being.

As soon as they realise their behaviour is being watched and noted they reign themselves in.

Those that continue to be rude will find themselves with a refusal of service or a refund.

Nobody has the right to speak to anyone like shit or treat them rudely for any reason and I won’t tolerate it.

gamerwidow · 31/12/2019 15:58

She was rude don't take it to heart though it's an unfortunate downside to being a public facing role.
Put it out of your head she won't be the last customer to be nasty and you can't let yourself dwell on these non incidents. It really isn't worth your time fretting.

heartsonacake · 31/12/2019 15:59

it's nothing to do with you; you could be happier than bloody santa and they'd still find fault.

That’s certainly true. I have been told on many occasions — in all seriousness — that I am “far too happy”.

Hidingtonothing · 31/12/2019 16:02

Sounds like she was the one having a bad day to me! Frankly it would be no wonder if you were miserable as sin having to deal with people like her but it definitely sounds like she was the one with the attitude problem here. It's hard not to let yourself be upset by it but it really does say far more about her than you if that's the way she treats someone just trying to do their job. Did you get any nice customers today to balance it out? Maybe focus on them instead if so, grumpy lady deserves no more of your headspace Flowers

Hepsibar · 31/12/2019 16:02

Some people are so rude, what an obnoxious cow, or maybe she has the onset of dementia or some other condition that excuses her from normal polite behaviour.

You do a very important job and try never to be belittled by other people who in their lack of manners reveal themselves as grotesque or with some sort of mental condition that lacks empathy.

Have a happy new year and hope you meet many more better mannered people.

DrCoconut · 31/12/2019 16:03

I remember being on work experience aged 15. Someone had a go at me for not knowing where something was. I was clearly very young and my badge said work experience. People are twats to retail workers unfortunately.

Brimful · 31/12/2019 16:06

Nobody has the right to speak to anyone like shit or treat them rudely for any reason

Totally agree. I have had some genuinely miserable service before, but I always assume they're having a bad day, or maybe even had some bad news - I still always smile and say thank you.

Hope you're feeling a bit better now, OP.

HighOnStilts · 31/12/2019 16:08

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Jessica7689 · 31/12/2019 16:08

I used to work as a GP receptionist when my kids were little and sometimes had to interact with people like this.

There’s nothing you can do to please them. They will find something to criticise you for.

I still remember one...

Patient turns up for his appointment, 3 hours late. The doctor he was supposed to be seeing has gone home, as they were only doing a morning session.

I explain to patient he has missed appointment. He starts shouting at me that I am the rudest person he has ever met and that I ‘shouldn’t be allowed to work around sick people’.

I try to offer to rebook him for another appointment in an hour’s time, the earliest we have. He starts shouting at me that that wait is unacceptable and that he wants to see the doctor he was booked in to see, not a ‘woman doctor.’

Patient demands that I give him my ‘full name’ so he can report me to my manager...

Some people are dicks. You can’t stop them being the way they are, so you just have to try not to give them any headspace.

GaaaaarlicBread · 31/12/2019 16:11

Sorry OP , that’s definitely not ok .
It’s horrible when you feel your lip wobble . I work in a hospital and worked on a ward there previously , we knew our patients as they care for regular treatment and one of them was quite grumpy and told me I was too happy . Too energetic etc . You can’t win lol

Inhismemory · 31/12/2019 16:11

She was an arsehole. It was her, not you.

GreyGardens88 · 31/12/2019 16:15

When I worked in retail when I was 17/18 in a supermarket, it was always the older customers who were the rudest/most entitled/liked to complain about everything. To some of them it was like going to the supermarket was their social highlight of the week

Mlou32 · 31/12/2019 16:16

YANBU. She sounds like a nasty horrid cow. I've worked in customer service before and people can be absolutely horrible and cruel. Just take it as a learning opportunity; never take your frustrations out on the person serving you. I used to work in a call centre and so now every time I call a call centre and I'm feeling frustrated, I bite my tongue and am polite and respectful. I remember what it was like to be in that position.

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