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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

customer told me I was miserable as sin.

161 replies

loserlily · 31/12/2019 15:51

Feel very pathetic. Working in retail over Christmas during the Uni break.

On my shift, a woman in her 60s comes to the till. I serve her, and she snaps at me "I said I didnt want a bag!". I say sorry, take the bag off her purchase and carry on. After this, I didn't make an conversation with her, like I normally do, because she seems impatient and not wanting to talk.

She then decides she wants the bag, so I pass her it.

She snaps at me "are you having a bad day?" I said no.

She then shouts loudly "well you look as miserable as bloody sin". Grabs her receipt off me and leaves the shop.

I could feel my cheeks burning up, and my lip start doing that stupid wobbling thing. Had to carry on serving the next customer, who heard.

I feel pathetic for getting upset. AIBU to think she treated me like a piece of shit? Or is this an okay thing to say?

OP posts:

PlomBear · 31/12/2019 17:34

I was in a Starbucks the other day and was shocked how rude people are - no please or thank yous and leaving rubbish all over the floor.

Tara336 · 31/12/2019 17:35

She was a horrible woman, you did nothing wrong at all. I now work with the public and it’s been shocking how rude people can be at times I’ve been shouted at, felt physically threatened and had one person threaten to get me the sack all because things were not going their way! I think people seem to be generally more rude and angry these days!

We were in a car park yesterday, had just pulled in a space and a lady was waiting to reverse into the space next to us, she was patiently waiting for DP to lock our car and move out of the way, another driver was waiting to pass and started sounding his horn and shouting at the lady waiting to park! DP stepped forward put his hand up and said my fault she was waiting for me and then left me waiting while he went to get a ticket. Lady started parking and other driver pulled up level with me wound down his window and proceeded to shout and swear at me! Bearing in mind I was stood minding my own business, hadn’t personally caused him any difficulties I have no idea why he thought it was ok to rant at me (or anyone else). He didn’t leave it, just kept on and on at me until he saw DP coming back and suddenly decided it was time to leave

ilovepixie · 31/12/2019 17:36

Working in retail sucks. I've had customers call me fat abs ugly. And I have a stammer and customers have laughed at me trying to speak to them.

imamum21 · 31/12/2019 17:38

i worked in retail and the amount of crap you take is unreal, i had been threatened, had a lady call me every name you can think of all because i wouldnt let her take her fags that she decided to open then tell me she had no money to pay for then threw them at me, i had the last laugh with her as he called me a cow and a slag etc i said thank you and im a good one etc, she came back half hour later with money to pay for them i said sorry im not serving you and my supervisor refused to as she witnessed the whole thing by then no other shop was open so she had to go without. i then had someone else with a weapon up there sleeve (didnt try anything in the shop though) my senior retail assistant ran away and left me to deal with the customer who then attacked his dad outside the shop and then assault the police! had someone shouting at another customer (the guys brother killed someone and he took some amount of abuse and attacks from others) i raised my voice to tell the one shouting to leave the store as i had children waiting to be served and they dont need to deal with that, the minute the guy left he was attacked. i told him not to leave the store and get the police to escort him away as i knew what was going to happen there was a big crowd waiting for him he ended up in hospital. just rise above them and dont let them get you down. i always spoke to customers the same way they spoke to me, even the ones who had been caught shoplifting that were going to put a complaint in because i wouldnt let them back in got laughed at by the staff.

midep · 31/12/2019 17:38

Happy Birthday Buerussian. You're nearly as old as me.

willowmelangell · 31/12/2019 17:43

@Bluerussian Happy birthday!

OP, I hope by reading these you know it is NOT you. If you are still thinking about it, I suggest you pay it forward/karma to give a cosmic balance. The next time you go shopping, give the assistant a lovely smile, look in the eye and say "Thank you so much." or whatever. So your niceness cancels out grumpy woman comment.

Drum2018 · 31/12/2019 17:44

Rude cow. I worked in a bank years ago and shortly after I started, a woman skipped the queue and came to my desk. I pointed out she'd skipped the queue, as I could see other customers were visibly annoyed. She whacked her walking stick on my desk and told me she knew the manager. I learned fairly quickly that she was a bit batshit. Actually another thread regarding a woman sending money via transfer to Africa reminded me of her today. She used to send numerous cheques to random lotteries in US. Nobody could tell her she was stupid to do so though.

Anyway @loserlily put that bitch out of your mind, she's probably related to the one I dealt with

Obligatorync · 31/12/2019 17:45

Retail work should be national service. A month for everyone every 5 years to keep them in the know.

kateandme · 31/12/2019 17:46

she needed to vent today.you could have passed her a fifty in change as a new year treat and she would have told you it could have been more.
it was about her and her day,how she is feeling.
if someone is kind/good mooded and they see someone having a bad day they do not react to it like this.so you could have actually been as miserable as sin and she shouldnt be talking to you like that.

SheChoseDown · 31/12/2019 17:48

People are fucking awful. An actual fight between 2 middle age ladies broke out today. People's emotions are fraught and they just can't contain themselves, so take it out on anyone possible.
Chin up, hopefully a day off for you tomorrow

ManonBlackbeak · 31/12/2019 17:48

I genuinely believe that everyone should be made to work in retail just once in their life, because until then you will have no idea just how fucking rude some people can be. I'd say 90% of customers were rude, entitled cunts when I worked in retail.

Now I always make sure I smile and say 'please' and 'thank you' when Im being served in a shop, because you'd be shocked at how many people don't. If I can make just one sales assistant's job slighly better just by smiling and being polite then that;s a positive.

ginghamtablecloths · 31/12/2019 17:50

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Chocolate1984 · 31/12/2019 17:53

When I worked in retail I learned to stay silent, neutral face and give zero fucks about anything they say. These people are in your life for minutes and mean nothing

PlomBear · 31/12/2019 17:56

Many moons ago, I was airline cabin crew. That job made me hate people.

I found that passengers could be really snide. I used to hate the faux-sympathy from smug passengers. “Oh poor you having to fly home now!” They didn’t like being told that the trolley dollies got a layover in said destination in a posh hotel.

The same with cleaning. Some of them got a weird hard on knowing they could make a mess and someone else had to clear it up. “I would hate your job having to clean, it’s not glamorous is it, maybe you can go to night school and get a proper career” They didn’t like being told that the cleaners did all the cleaning and that I had a degree and chose to do the job!

Icanttakethiscrapanymore · 31/12/2019 18:00

She was very rude. I worked in retail and hated it. You really get to see the worst in people.
I got fed up of it in the end and when someone was rude to me I’d say “please don’t be rude to me” or the Mumsnet classic of “do you mean to be so rude”
You’d be surprised how many people back down and apologise. Or they’d see their arse and I’d refuse to serve them. However I had a excellent manager who always backed up his staff so I wasn’t worried about getting into trouble for it.

ExtraneousDetail · 31/12/2019 18:12

I commented upthread, but also wanted to say - when I worked Boxing Day several customers thanked me for working on that day (thus allowing them to pick up bits they’d forgotten). That was very nice

minesagin37 · 31/12/2019 18:16

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InTheCludgie · 31/12/2019 18:19

Sorry you had to put up with that behaviour OP I worked in McDonald's years ago and can remember a few occasions of being verbally abused by customers. One piece of shit asked me if a job requirement of working there was 'being ugly'. Well if that were actually the case HE would have fit the bill for sure!

Vercingetorixraktavija · 31/12/2019 18:21

I worked in customer service, and people sometimes take it out on you. It's not you, they are the miserable ones, with unhappy life. Pity them. And move on. Have a great new year.

FloralFestiveBunting · 31/12/2019 18:26

I am fond of reminding people I know that myself and all the retail workers I know will remember a good customer and treat them well, but we will remember a bad customer, tell all our colleagues, our mates, and the internet what a fucking twat they are, and make sure we don't do any of the little extras we might do for someone nice. I've definitely recognized a wanky returning customer before now and gone all 'Computer says no' on them.

It's in your interest to treat retail workers well. We're not indentured servants, and no, you don't pay my wages.

Chin up OP.

ShabbyNat · 31/12/2019 18:30

I remember, years ago when I was about 18/19,working in a local supermarket-a big chain!!-, a woman accused me of short changing her, swore blind that shed handed over a £20 note & Id given her change for£5!!! She never questioned it at the time, but came back an hour after the transaction, accusing me of short changing her, demanding that the manager refund her there & then & then when he refused, demanded that he check the till
Luckily the manager trusted me implicitly & called her out on it, in front of a load of other customers, an argument ensued, where the manager did take the till out, did all the checks as if end of day, got the office lady to cash-up as if end of day trading, all taking about approx. 45 minutes, to find that my till was spot on-right down to the last penny, as usual, as he suspected
While my till was being checked, he had a word with me & asked if I remembered the customer, which I did-she was a regular, he asked if Id possibly short-changed her & I said I dont think so
The customer then accused me of fiddling the customers after her, to make the till right
I am not that clever Plus I am honest
That's the worst experience by far that I`ve encountered in retail/public faced work

Claphands · 31/12/2019 18:34

When I was about 18 I worked in a fashion store, one day I was on the changing room and we were told to take the clothes from the customer, count them and hang the changing room tag on them before giving them an individual changing booth (or people used to hide clothes in between the hangers and steal them), so a man who was old enough to be my grandad wanted to use the changing room and when I took the hangers from him he started ranting about me calling me a bad apple that spoilt the apple cart etc etc He went down to the managers and ranted about me when I’d only ever been polite to him. I was so upset and I’m now 50.

Riv12345 · 31/12/2019 18:37

Don't take it to heart op,
Just let it go over your head, anyway your better than that. She probably having a bad day and gone into next shop etc and snapped at someone else.

ManiacalLapwing · 31/12/2019 18:38

Her behaviour was very unreasonable. I think you should always ask if a customer would like a bag for environmental reasons, I feel annoyed when I am not asked. That in no way excuses her reaction though.

Singlewhiteguineapig · 31/12/2019 18:39

Some people are utter cunts

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