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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask for your Christmas CFuckery stories?

318 replies

bluesteakandcheese · 30/12/2019 10:25

I am currently laid up in bed feeling like utter garbage, spent last night being sick so I'm exhausted but can't sleep.
Anyway - as you can imagine I'm pretty bored (DH is staying away from me in case I've got a virus apart from to bring me water) so WIBU to ask for your Christmas CF stories to keep me entertertained?

OP posts:
jaguar67 · 30/12/2019 16:15

From a sister to her DN who was 18mths.... a used DVD of Snow White, not even wound back to the beginning...

NettleTea · 30/12/2019 16:16

my great aunt once gave my parents a set of place mats and matching coasters that had been cut using pinking shears out of a wallpaper sample book.

TheMamaYo · 30/12/2019 16:39

Only a little bit cheeky, not the usual CF nastiness. Grandad always sends the kids’ gifts to mine (direct from their Amazon list). I wrap it up, then take it with their gifts to our Christmas get together so he can give it to them. 😂 We adore him though, it’s not a problem. Just makes me smile as they are more than capable to wrap it up.

MissConductUS · 30/12/2019 16:43

All of the half eaten packages of food are really just over the top CF'ery. If they liked it they should have gotten a fresh package to give away.

DS, 19 years old and just back from uni announced to me on the 23rd that he hadn't gotten anything for DH and could I drive him to the shops and help him pick out something. He has form for this, so I was rather expecting it and took him.

my2020newdecade · 30/12/2019 16:47

I got a Yardley gift set from DH.

I'm 45, not 85 Confused

LittleMy77 · 30/12/2019 16:49

We had two vegetarians come on Christmas day. I lovingly made sure there was salmon (they eat fish) and the side dishes were all veggie, only to find them both tucking into the pigs in blankets!

I also received a really random assortment of presents (toiletries) from the extended IL's. DH is to blame here as it only takes 1 conversation to say "oh she'd like X, she can't wear Y as she's allergic" but he doesn't bother. Every year, it all goes straight in the charity shop bag. I've suggested secret santa next year..

Spitsandspots · 30/12/2019 16:49

a used DVD of Snow White, not even wound back to the beginning...

Grin
FlamingoAndJohn · 30/12/2019 16:50

From a sister to her DN who was 18mths.... a used DVD of Snow White, not even wound back to the beginning...

You know that’s not how DVDs work?

Sickandscared · 30/12/2019 16:52

My DPs daughter has gone NC with him for over a year. We are distressed about this and doing everything we can to fix it (obviously we are not blameless here!) His ex is openly delighted about this and has been trying and failing to break us up (I am not OW btw, ex is just furious that he has instigated divorce proceedings).

This year my DP has lost his job and I've gone on long term sick leave as having chemo for cancer. Things are stressful. We have had to cut back massively everywhere. He is still trying to resolve things with daughter and was hoping for some contact over Christmas.

His ex messaged him to say daughter did not want to see him over Christmas but please transfer £400 for a present she wishes to buy her.

Zaphodsotherhead · 30/12/2019 17:24

My XP came to me for Christmas every year for eight years (I have my kids so wasn't going to leave them and go to his!). His contribution to Christmas dinner (and breakfast and tea and Christmas Eve and Boxing Day) was always to bring some beer that he'd got as a tip from work. Beer nobody drinks. Ever. So every year my 'beer cellar' got fuller and fuller... He never once asked if there was anything he could bring or that I wanted, or cooked anything (he didn't like Christmas so never bought Christmas food).

He was also EXTREMELY fussy about food, ie, couldn't eat 'two different meats together' so no pigs in blankets (yes, yes I know they are the SAME meat, I kept telling him) or bacon on the chicken or anything with cream or cheese or sauce for him.

But eight years with no usable contribution. I have no idea why he never offered - oh, wait, yes I do, he's tighter than the proverbial.

dontmentionbookclub · 30/12/2019 17:24

I'm enjoying this thread immensely and I like everyone's good humour about the CFery as well. I can't compete with anything but it has reminded me about the year my MIL gave me a little framed poem, the one they use at AA meetings about having the wisdom to accept what can't be changed or somesuch. Made me laugh,

Zaphodsotherhead · 30/12/2019 17:32

Has the vomiting settled down @dontmentionbookclub? Are you feeling better? Sometimes nothing but others' tales of woe helps!

FireUnderpants · 30/12/2019 17:35

Sil googled the cost of the watch her mum got her for Christmas. Then the cost of the gift mil gave to everyone else.
Last year she sulked because hers cost less than her brothers. Mil actually gave her the difference in cash out of her purse.

This year hers was more expensive and she spent all day telling everyone.

FruitcakeOfHate · 30/12/2019 17:43

Ah, here's to being assertive! I never dole out CFery but I don't take it in return, either. So bliss! Know, I hope you told the relative not to come to yours to sponge. As for the gifts, just stop exchanging gifts with twats, even in your own family! 'We're no longer indulging in gift exchange' and then palm them off with some twaddle about charity and 'tis the season for focusing on god or the less fortunate or whatever comes to mind. Works every time!

dontmentionbookclub · 30/12/2019 17:46

@zaphodsotherhead no vomiting here, thank goodness, but thank you for asking! Similar names on here to mine I think...

CigarsofthePharoahs · 30/12/2019 17:55

My aunt invited herself to my house two years ago.
She didn't talk to me about it. Just badgered my mum about what she was doing and then said "I'll come with you."
I wasn't allowed to object.
She did at least bring gifts for my children. I got some art prints she'd been given by someone else and didn't want (she told me this) and DH got a hideous tie with "meet me under the mistletoe" on it that she'd won in a Christmas tombolo. She told us this.
Didn't contribute anything else, didn't thank me for feeding her. She then spent some time complaining to my mum about the poor mattress on her spare bed.
My mum didn't actually spell out "Look, no-one invited you, you're bloody lucky we've put up with you." but there were a few responses.
The following year she did the same again, only my sister was hosting my parents so she decided go there.
This year.... both my mum and I were not in the mood. Neither of us are in the best of health. The inevitable phonecall did happen, but my mum decided to obfuscate her way through it with lots of "Oh I'm not sure what we're doing" and "Well Cigars has been unwell" till my aunt gave up. She booked herself into an adult only hotel and probably had a lovely time.
Part of me feels bad. But then this is someone who completely ignores us for years even, but will suddenly resurface when she wants something. She spends most of her time complaining about this, that and the other and it's very draining.
I suspect we'll just get radio silence for a long time - probably till next Christmas!

Spied · 30/12/2019 18:10

A new 'friend' once went on and on about the gifts she had bought me for Christmas, about how she'd saved for them, needed to wait in for delivery, etc. She also kept asking what my favourite brand of make-up was and how much of my favourite perfume I had left.
I presumed she had gone overboard on the gift front and told her not to spend too much on me. Nevertheless I thought I should spend a bit more than I usually would for a friend and I bought her a few costly items that I had to stretch to.
Christmas Eve she turns up with two huge gift bags. Christmas morning I excitedly open the bags to find....smelly second hand clothes that are too large and old cheap broken make-up pallets. ( She works in a charity shop).
I wouldn't have been too bothered if only she hadn't made a huge deal about my gifts and I hadn't as a result spent a lot on her.

SchadenfreudePersonified · 30/12/2019 18:42

Then he txt me on Christmas day causing an argument telling me I'm a shit child.
I didn't respond to anything.

I would have responded that it was hardly surprising, seeing as he was a shit father.

What a horrible man!

Fishfingersandwichplease · 30/12/2019 19:13

Not a cf but had a single male friend of ours for Christmas dinner....he bought us a kettle for a gift as he knew ours broke, really thoughtful you might think but it actually broke in June and he was genuinelly shocked that we had bought another one said he couldn't believe it about five times!! Bless him - wouldn't be so bad if he wasn't always round hee drinking tea!!

Whatsnewpussyhat · 30/12/2019 19:22

Pigs in blankets on a plate for breakfast

I'd have been happy with that Xmas Grin

cstaff · 30/12/2019 19:30

@Fishfingersandwichplease
That made me laugh. You were very efficient in buying your new kettle Grin

Bloomburger · 30/12/2019 19:32

DHs brother forgot the cheese he was supposed to bring but instead bought a half eaten box of caramels. This after the previous year bringing precisely nothing.

The SIL bought a couple of litres of awful cider, the other BIL I asked to bring mints so he bought a box of those awful Elizabeth Shaw ones you get in an Indian restaurant to go round 24 of us and MIL brought 6 mince pies.

I then asked everyone to help with the clearing up and they all just sat there so I warned them that they wouldn't be invited the following year and super CF BIL (of half eaten caramels) looked around, laughed and said 'so do we actually want to come next year?'

He has yet to step inside my front door again because I decided after years of being taken the piss out if it wasn't going to happen again. (Well until DD and her BF and this past Christmas but that's a whole different story!!)

SpoonAndString · 30/12/2019 19:40

My dad got me an ornamental wooden duck that had been kicking around at his house for a few years and had had its head broken off and reglued back on. I’m not in any way known for my love of ducks. He is quite wealthy by the way so it wasn’t a case of not being able to afford to buy something new.

Fishfingersandwichplease · 30/12/2019 19:50

Wasn't l just?!😂😂

Justkeeprollingalong · 30/12/2019 19:59

I'm with @FruitcakeOfHate here, why do some any people put up with this awful behaviour without saying anything??