Wheelchair / buggy on bus

[MoonlightMistletoe]

Today I had got the bus with my sister we both have children I had my toddler who was walking and my one year old who's only just started to walk who is still in a buggy, my sister has a 12week old baby who was also in a buggy.

We had got on the bus as you do and the next stop another parent got on with their buggy, a few stops later we stop and straight away a woman is screaming/shouting at the rear doors with her phone in our faces demanding we collapse our buggies, very angry , shouting at us with buggies and also at the driver. The driver is telling us to stay put due to her being aggressive and recording us. Someone on the bus was telling us to co operate with the woman who wanted to get a person on the bus who was in a wheelchair. We know disabled people are a priority and had absolutely not said we wouldn't put the buggies down, I was taking my sleeping one year out the buggy while this woman was still swearing and being nasty and recording us, I had given my baby to my sister to sit with my toddler and herself while I was about to take her baby out the pram then all of a sudden everyone made a "ohhhhhhh" gasp and the disabled man has fallen down the side of the curb and bus sideways in his wheelchair.

She then looses her absolute shit at us for her own mistakes being so caught up in recording us to make sure we move that the man is now probably injured.

AIBU to think all she had to do was say excuse me can we move the buggies so I can get the wheelchair on?

I wonder if the bus driver had already indicated that he wasn't going to let them on before all the shouting started.

From the carers perspective she should not have had to wait for people in the legally designated space to vacate because they should it have been there in the first place. That’s the material point

Indeed.

I don’t know why many posters can’t grasp this simple point.

The space has a sign which allows for use by pram if empty but shows priority to person in wheelchair. So it is different to a parking space.

Yes and clearly this system is being abused with drivers unwilling or unable to enforce the law. Pram users are only allowed to use the space as a courtesy. P&C spaces are also a courtesy. As the system is being abused choices are to withdraw privilege or enforce. Enforcement clearly isn’t working leaving only one option.

i wonder if the bus driver had already indicated that he wasn’t going to let them on before all the shouting started.

Quite. But let’s blame the “crazy carer” and report her when the actual person needing reporting is the driver . By not reporting the driver, op is part of the problem.

I think it's more that the carers actions led to the man being hurt.

Buses don't let aggressive people on, if she was being aggressive, however justified she felt from how others have treated her, that's why he didn't let her on. Not sure why that's hard to grasp.

Dubaya
Read the fucking thread

I have thanks, not sure why you feel the need to swear, it doesn't really help get your point across.

So the is driver wouldn’t let them on, looks likda recurrent situation and probably signalled there was no room and your response is to blame the carer. Nice.

The shouting may have started after the bus driver had signalled he wasn't going to let the wheelchair on. Bus drivers do this because they can't be bothered/ don't want to spend time to get the wheelchair on.

I am not saying that makes it ok to be abusive but that this is a possibility and it is something the OP wouldn't have noticed.

As soon as carer started screaming and shouting, she lost the argument. Once people do this, others stop listening to what is being said, and just focus on the anger and aggression. It’s never ok to be verbally abusive.

Livelong
Let’s presume the carer was given a signal from the bus driver there was no room, what should she he done? Your argument against her position presumes there is a balance of power when there is none. Say nothing or get angry and the outcome for her and the person in the wheelchair was the same. Can you honestly tell me you’d blithely accept your clients legal rights being abused?

As soon as carer started screaming and shouting, she lost the argument. Once people do this, others stop listening to what is being said, and just focus on the anger and aggression. It’s never ok to be verbally abusive.

When you’ve been refused lots of times to get on the bus (by the sounds of it by the same driver) you tend to get frustrated and shout as you get totally ignored otherwise. She wouldn’t have had her phone out ready to film if she wasn’t expecting to be refused access.

What was she supposed to do? Just meekly wait for the next bus? Or the one after that as the next one was full of buggys? How many buses does she have to wait for before getting upset? How many buses had she already been refused access to before this bus?

I can virtually guarantee the driver waved her away as he pulled up to say there’s no room as it happens on a regular basis and some drivers do it automatically as they don’t want to bother asking the buggys to fold (you know, their job that they get paid to do) and then made it worse by telling the buggys not to fold as he had already decided not to let her on

Is there really a need for people to get so uptight about this?

Melrose try using public transport for a year using a wheelchair and everything that brings before saying something so completely ridiculous.

Mummy of little dragon, your comments are full of vitriol. It's very unnecessary. Wouldn't you rather look on the bright side of life than get so stressed out on an online forum? What are you (and others) achieving, other than high blood pressure?

Because if it wasn't for people like lityledragon speaking up disabled people's rights will continue to be abused.

@MelroseHigginbottom Feel free to follow your own advice. Cheerio.

@Mummyoflittledragon Keep on keeping on.

We can only go on facts, and ops post does not suggest the driver had refused entry this time, or any other time. Had this happened, answers would be different. It may have happened but we can’t assume it did to justify the carers behaviour. And tbh, people can be nasty or confrontational without reason, so it’s not unheard of for people to kick off for no other reason than that they’re having a bad day. Our buses display notices saying threatening and abusive behaviour will not be tolerated, so the carers actions could actually lead to her getting barred from public transport. This isn’t wheelchair user vs buggy user, but each group should receive consideration for their needs by bus companies.

My comments are full of vitriol.
Tickety boo.

Thanks ladies. I am lucky to be able to walk and all that. Don’t have a wheelchair even though it would be useful at times. I couldn’t imagine how hard it would be to need one permanently and I’m so lucky to have that choice.

Livelong
Op wasn’t aware of the woman’s existence until this recent bus journey. She also would not have been aware whether or not the driver made a signal to the woman. I could just as easily conclude he enjoys winding her up. There are no facts. Just perceptions in this instance.

mummyoflittledragon exactly. Too many ifs and buts. We could also conclude that maybe the woman has form for this, and is known to the bus driver as being confrontational and aggressive. None of us know, but the post does appear to suggest that the carer was at fault in this situation, and so that’s the only information we have to go on.

@Dolorabelle That isn't the case though, yes it's a wheelchair priority space but it does say "Buggies may use this space but if a wheelchair user needs it please vacate" so when I got onto the bus there was no wheelchair there so I went in the space where it said I could. Then as soon as I saw a wheelchair even though being shouted at I did take my baby out and began folding to "please vacate the wheelchair priority space, you may need to fold to make space" that's exactly what I did. But as the woman was being aggressive from the get go the driver refused her on the bus in the end.

Sorry I am trying to catch up,

I do believe the driver intended to let them on as he opened the doors even though no one got off the bus.

@Mummyoflittledragon people ARE actually allowed to use the space though arnt they! Until a wheelchair user needs it , at the time I was able to so I did. And like I keep explaining I was vacating the space even though being swore at being called a cunt I don't think I deserved that at all so I think the driver had the right to refuse her to get on in the end!