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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Re 'if you're well enough to be out you're well enough to be in work'

160 replies

Misscromwellrocks · 29/12/2019 11:01

My sister is getting over a really bad chest infection and is at the stage of being able to potter down to the village for a bit of fresh air every morning before going back home to rest.

She's due back in to work after Christmas tomorrow but really could do with another couple of days recuperating. She's a bit worried though as a colleague of hers was coming out of Tesco yesterday and stopped and exchanged a bit of small talk. My sister is now worried that she'll be seen as a shirker on the grounds that she's well enough to be out etc.

Aibu to think there's a huge difference between
getting up at 6.30, facing a long coomute, a full day at work, another long commute home and
having a lie on, going for a short stroll to the shops or to a local cafe, then going back home to rest.

Being able to do the latter in no way implies your up to the former in my opinion.

OP posts:
HopelessLayout · 29/12/2019 13:00

Thehop raises an interesting point. If she didn't get sick pay, would she go into work in her current state?

And if so, would that necessarily mean she was "fit for work"?

Emmelina · 29/12/2019 13:03

I had a sickness bug a few months ago. When things had settled I had an overwhelming urge to scrub my house! I wasn’t yet 48 hours clear of sickness so couldn’t return to work yet without risking infecting colleagues and clients.
I popped into town briefly, got some staples from Tesco and then raided Poundland for flash, bleach, cloths...
ran into a client on my way in, who helpfully relayed I’d been merrily shopping on my day offHmm of course, this was raised in my return to work. I explained had she followed me in she’d have seen me buyIn cleaning stuff so I could hopefully stop my bug from lingering and also infecting the DH and DCs leading to more time off work. They were fine.
Your sister has done nothing wrong. A doctor wouldn’t advise she stay in a stuffy room, a small amount of fresh air when she’s well enough to leave the house doesn’t mean she’s well enough to be around everybody else and their coughs and sneezes, poor heating system, stress and all that.
If they do happen to gossip, poke them in the eye.

HardofCleaning · 29/12/2019 13:04

is she being paid? If she is, she IS taking the piss, she should take it as a holiday.

Sick pay is for when you're sick. It might be that those not entitled to sick pay selfishly go into work making us all sick (or to be fair might have no choice but to be selfish as they need the money). That doesn't mean it's sensible or noble.

FairytaleofButlins · 29/12/2019 13:05

ArgumentativeAardvaark

of course the contract applies, but taking days off and claiming sick pays when you are well enough to work IS taking the piss, that's my point.

Everyone in my company has statutory sick pay on their contract - I can tell you that people who don't take the piss are on full pay, even when they are on sick leave. I like that, it's fair.

It's well known (just look at any figures) that workers on PAYE tend to be a lot more off sick that self-employed ones.. Funny that.

MistyCloud · 29/12/2019 13:05

@Misscromwellrocks

I am torn tbh. So I didn't 'vote.'

On the one hand I do agree that just because you are in tesco getting some milk and bread at 1pm, that doesn't mean you are fit enough for work.

On the other hand, there will always be someone who will say they saw you out (when you're off sick,) and will stir the pot.

Not sure if there's much they can do though. I don't think it's LAW that you can't step outside your front door when you're off sick!

There are some funny rules about going off sick straight after an official holiday (bank holiday or one you booked) though. Someone I know rang in sick for the Thursday and Friday (27th and 28th December) last year, and she lost all her holiday pay - £300 or so. And as the holiday entitlement went from 1st Jan to 31st Dec, and they ran a 'use it or lose it' type rule, she couldn't get the 'holiday' time back and lost all that pay. It was in her contract too, so she could do nothing about it.

SO your sister needs to be careful.

Also, it's a bad idea to do what my friend's DH did. He was written off for 3 weeks (after having a small procedure in hospital,) and on the second week he went to Brighton for a day trip. It was only a gentle, 'tootling round the shops,' and sitting on the beach type day, but the daft pillock went and posted pics all over facebook! His boss was NOT impressed and gave him a right snotty talking to when he got back.

I don't think there was anything legally that he could do (as when you're on sick, I think you're allowed to be out before 7pm..??) But the manager at work was less than impressed!

FairytaleofButlins · 29/12/2019 13:06

Sick pay is for when you're sick. It might be that those not entitled to sick pay selfishly go into work making us all sick (or to be fair might have no choice but to be selfish as they need the money). That doesn't mean it's sensible or noble.

the woman is strolling around going for coffee. Clearly not too worried about making everyone else in the shops sick is she?

beautifulstranger101 · 29/12/2019 13:06

Also, it's a bad idea to do what my friend's DH did. He was written off for 3 weeks (after having a small procedure in hospital,) and on the second week he went to Brighton for a day trip. It was only a gentle, 'tootling round the shops,' and sitting on the beach type day, but the daft pillock went and posted pics all over facebook! His boss was NOT impressed and gave him a right snotty talking to when he got back

Yeah that was a really stupid thing to do- its asking for questions to be asked

HardofCleaning · 29/12/2019 13:07

@FairytaleofButlins getting out of the house for an hour is often recommended when sick, sitting in an air conditioned office all day after a long commute on a crowded train is not.

MistyCloud · 29/12/2019 13:08

@beautifulstranger101

EXACTLY! Grin

Sleepyquest · 29/12/2019 13:08

I always worry about this. I would say I popped to Tesco to stock up on painkillers and orange juice, if anyone questioned me

ButterflyBitch · 29/12/2019 13:10

This happened to me. I was hospitalised with a chest infection when I was younger and the Doctor signed me off for 3 weeks after I got home.
I’d pootled in to town (5 min walk from house) to get something I needed and bumped in to a colleague who had a day off. She’d gone back to work and tried to bad mouth me to my boss who thankfully shot her down because he understood the difference between a full days work and a short walk to the shops.

Grasspigeons · 29/12/2019 13:11

The thing i find about sick pay is its very all or nothing. There are times when i have been well enough for a short day at work doing easier tasks but not a full day doing the harder bits of my job. When i had flexitime and was more automous in my role I could achieve going to work when ill much easier. but other jobs Ive had it is full on no choice over tasks with a full day or a sick day.

toomanyhobbies · 29/12/2019 13:12

I’ve heard that this has probably been said about me at work. I was off for 8weeks in the summer due to meningitis (only work term time so was off anyway from end of July). And off again for 7 weeks nov & December due to an operation. I am still recovering mentally and physically from the meningitis when I had the op and that has knocked me. What people don’t realise if they see me out is that I may look fine but you don’t see the exhaustion after.

ClientListQueen · 29/12/2019 13:13

Of course you can go out
I had 8 weeks off post spinal op. Now if I had been bungee jumping, sure. But I was told to walk as much as possible so yes I would have been seen strolling around the park with a coffee or in the gym doing rehab. But I couldn't sit for longer than 45 mins or bend or twist

Same today - I have raging tonsillitis and went to the supermarket on the way back from out of hours. I needed something soft to eat

Allergictoironing · 29/12/2019 13:14

I was off sick many years ago with an injury. This was before working from home was really feasible, and though I could have worked OK there was no way I could manage the commute without me being in so much pain I wouldn't be fit to work once I got there as the job was in central London and commuting in the rush hour by bus and train can be pretty uncomfortable and tiring at the best of times let alone when you have a significant injury.

Working when you are in recovery from a debilitating illness is only likely to put you back anyway.

akittencalledjesus · 29/12/2019 13:29

is she being paid? If she is, she IS taking the piss, she should take it as a holiday.

Oh, you are one of those gossips.

the woman is strolling around going for coffee.

Or perhaps the walk to the shops was taxing on her body because she likely hasn't got the energy to keep going (as is normal at the tail end of a chest infection) so grabs a coffee to get a chance of a sit down.

Running before you can walk is thoroughly stupid and reserved for those who like to be martyrs, or those who are unfortunate enough to not get proper sick pay.

DrCoconut · 29/12/2019 13:30

I was signed off for 2 weeks with a chest infection a few years ago. My immediate manager said I should have gone in to collect some work to do at home if I couldn't come in as I wasn't bed bound or anything. It was winter and a 45 minute walk each way (I didn't drive then and it's not on a bus route). Luckily HR disagreed. I was still put on stage 1 of competency because I'd unfortunately been off sick with D and V a few months before but I've been fortunate enough to be mostly well since then and reset my record.

PorpentinaScamander · 29/12/2019 13:32

Yanbu.

I've been off sick since Feb. Weirdly I have left the house in that time.

Ive had messages from colleagues I considered friends asking how I'm well enough to go out but not go to work. Hmm

ArgumentativeAardvaark · 29/12/2019 13:34

ArgumentativeAardvaark

of course the contract applies, but taking days off and claiming sick pays when you are well enough to work IS taking the piss, that's my point.
@FairytaleofButlins the OP’s sister is NOT well enough to work. That is the whole point of the post.

Ivebeentohellanditscalledikea · 29/12/2019 13:42

I had someone report me when I was younger. I had been so Ill I had been in intensive care with my liver and kidneys shutting down. I was in hospital for a month then signed off for two further months. In the last month and a half I had lost so much weight and muscle that my Dr told me to start going for walks but to go with someone as I had so little energy. So I started going with my nan on her errands so I could walk a bit then have a lift home. Someone at my work saw me in all my yellow glory and reported me for faking. When I did go back to work they had a real go at me and accused me of lying.

Ivebeentohellanditscalledikea · 29/12/2019 13:43

When I say went out with her it was like a car trip to the post office or to Tesco nothing fancy.

Deathraystare · 29/12/2019 13:49

As long as she is not on facebook partying or ski-ing that is fine. People still need groceries and presumably any prescriptions etc.

Jetstream · 29/12/2019 13:50

A colleague has worked with chest infections because there was no-one to cover for her. It took her a lot to fully recover, she looked really ill and said she felt awful

FairytaleofButlins · 29/12/2019 13:54

akittencalledjesus
interesting that having an opinion, clearly different from yours, makes me a "gossip" in your views Grin

ClientListQueen · 29/12/2019 13:58

I'm well enough to walk around the shops. But I can't speak! So I can't do my job
Same with after the spinal op, I couldn't sit down