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AIBU?

Anyone else sick of their DH?

140 replies

Iwasneveragoddess · 27/12/2019 15:35

Or is it just me?

He’s behaved like such a knob over Christmas seriously considered leaving him.

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Am I being unreasonable?

AIBU

You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

WaterOffADucksCrack · 27/12/2019 20:13

ProfessionalBoss ok then. Maybe I'm ghe strange one for thinking it's unkind when someone is talking about their marriage problems clearly upset, to then boast you have a pretty perfect marriage. I just can't imagine thinking that's helpful or kind but everyone's different.

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Iwasneveragoddess · 27/12/2019 20:18

He fucked yo badly at work a while back and was facing military jail which I supported him through.

I have just said I didn’t react that badly then.

OP posts:

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damnthatanxiety · 27/12/2019 20:21

arethereanyleftatal
l think most, or many at the very least, women are.

flipping huge assumption there. No, I am not sick of my DH and I doubt 'most' women are.

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IamtheDevilsAvocado · 27/12/2019 22:05

No, I'm revoltingly happy with me bloke....
He's kind, decent, a good lay ...he's also my best pal.

Naturally we have arguments... Furious ones... But all done and am dusted in 15mins...

Some lovely thoughtful Christmas presents... Not massively pricey... But I'm more than happy.

And he puts up with my very selfish family members and is pretty sweet with my elderly relatives.... Ooh young maaaan!

Sorry to all those with shits as husbands...

Please... I do realise how difficult it is to dump them, when you have kids/no money /etc etc....

Please please remember you only have one life to live... Life is too short...

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CustomerCervixDepartment · 27/12/2019 22:52

I see so many threads where women act like these shite specimens just magically appeared in their house one day and they’re absolutely powerless to stop this shit, ‘how can I make him chaaaange’ /‘it was so good at the start before he really revealed his abusive behaviour, so I bred a baaaaby to make it all better’/‘I can’t leave-the house/no money/unmarried so have zero protection/my kids don’t notice the abuse’. Like, obviously abusers are scum, but there’s no need to stay with them. And even more no need to inflict your shit choices on your kids, damaging them for life, I speak as someone whose parent put cock before her kid but would still screech that she ‘did her best!!!’, nah, her ‘best’ damaged me physically and mentally for the rest of my life. Don’t make your kids live like this. You can still shag him all you want, but keep him away from your kids.

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Iwasneveragoddess · 27/12/2019 23:00

@CustomerCervixDepartment
Thanks

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Itswritteninthestars · 27/12/2019 23:17

Yeah I've not spoken to mine since Christmas Day when his excessive drinking once again brings out the paranoia followed by his own pity party.

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WendyMoiraAngelaDarling · 27/12/2019 23:27

My ex ruined Christmas every year for ten years with his excessive drinking and selfish behaviour. The worst thing was never being able to keep my kids in line - and I am pretty soft - without him jumping in on their side, as though I was an abusive, arsehole mother who he needed to protect them from. Even the most basic parenting issues like bed times or not giving sweets too close to bedtime would be met with glares and overruling me. Dear me I am so glad I got rid of him!

Just leave him OP. He sounds awful. Why keep putting yourself through it?

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CustomerCervixDepartment · 27/12/2019 23:35

Thanks your sarcastic response to my post about my trauma, OP. My parent chose cock over her kid, I was saying obviously abusers are scum, that goes without saying, but allowing or making your kids live in a hostile environment is also abusive (NSPCC), you can still shag the guy if you need him in your life, but it’s never ok to inflict shit life choices on kids who cannot escape.

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DeeCeeCherry · 27/12/2019 23:52

He's spiteful to your kids and resents your closeness with them.

No man is worth putting before your kids. It will come back to bite you in the end because they're old enough to see that's what you're doing. They're young adults now but when they're older they'll look at you askance. & it's likely at least one of them will distance themself from you.

You may deny that's what you're doing but what isn't obvious to you is often glaringly obvious to others.

MH issues are no excuse for being an obnoxious fool by the way. I know people with MH issues who are nice. Because their innate nature isn't unpleasant.

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RickOShay · 28/12/2019 10:03

How are you feeling today @Iwasneveragoddess?
Dh and I are still not speaking!
Doesn’t sting like it used to though.

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Oblomov20 · 28/12/2019 11:43

Dh hasn't spoken to me since Christmas Day.
We've just had another row. He's taken ds2 off for food shopping.
Good riddance!

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LagunaBubbles · 28/12/2019 13:37

Maybe I'm ghe strange one for thinking it's unkind when someone is talking about their marriage problems clearly upset, to then boast you have a pretty perfect marriage. I just can't imagine thinking that's helpful or kind but everyone's different

No-ones boasting about anything. Thats ridicolous, people can say their happy with their partners without it being boasting.

I am sick of the attitude here that woman are powerless and trapped in relationships with abusive men and its the children who suffer yet when you point this out you get shot down by some posters. It's not easy as I've been there but you can have a better life. Emotionally damaged children grow up into emotionally damaged adults.

*CustomerCervixDepartmentx
Thanks hmm

I'm sorry you had the chdhoodvyou had CCD and I'm the sorry the OP of this thread saw fit to respond with a sarky emotion.

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Iwasneveragoddess · 28/12/2019 14:09

The sarky emoji was for the poster suggesting I have given my children a similar childhood to hers, which I have not and her language, calling a relationship “a shag”.

It wasn’t directed toward her actual experience.

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LagunaBubbles · 28/12/2019 18:07

Well you are giving your children not a great emotionally stable childhood though, she wasn't wrong, staying with this awful man.

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Iwasneveragoddess · 28/12/2019 18:44

My children are adults.

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LagunaBubbles · 28/12/2019 18:54

OK they are adults, doesnt stop them being damaged emotionally, both in the past and the present.

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hhsa · 28/12/2019 19:12

I threw mine out on Wednesday and been in peace since then. Told him to not spoil my holidays and go away. Enjoying time me and my 4 kids. He makes me so miserable and negative.

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hhsa · 28/12/2019 19:24

My oh been sleeping on sofa for over a year and then is surprised when I kick off.

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BoxOfBabyCheeses · 28/12/2019 23:28

OP, you still haven't said what caused the argument, or what was said/done during the argument. After 120 posts it seems like something that would usually have been explained. I'm starting to think that you are being very selective with your story.

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Iwasneveragoddess · 29/12/2019 12:10

Not really sure it’s relevant what caused the argument?

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thecatsarecrazy · 29/12/2019 12:22

Yes my husband is normally at work and I was looking forward to having him home. He has done fuck all. Sat at his pc pretty much all over Christmas. Didn't help with anything Christmas day. Everything is such hard work for him. Just asked him to make the kids lunch. He said don't talk to me like that and sat on his arse for a further 10 minutes.

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Junie70 · 29/12/2019 12:47

Mine has gone out today, thank god. The spade was perilously close to coming out of the garden shed and I was mentally planning out which patio slabs to dig up.

DH has had a catsbum face since early December because Christmas involves spending money (money that we have plenty of, can afford and is a relative drop in the ocean compared to income and savings). It's still in situ with no sign of retreating

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Loomed · 29/12/2019 13:04

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Loomed · 29/12/2019 13:08

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