My feed

to access all these features


Anyone else sick of their DH?

140 replies

Iwasneveragoddess · 27/12/2019 15:35

Or is it just me?

He’s behaved like such a knob over Christmas seriously considered leaving him.


OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?


You have one vote. All votes are anonymous.

Ameanstreakamilewide · 27/12/2019 17:59

Well done, Yet - that was helpful.

babasaclover · 27/12/2019 18:00

Thoroughly hacked off with mine. He has shown his selfish side again by doing his own activities and hobbies despite me having an operation Xmas week which has left me on medication unable to drive. I'm trapped with a toddler while he swans off with his mates.

Called him a cunt earlier (to my friend) and it's true. I would love to be put first for once.

They rarely know what they have got until it's gone 😭

IM0GEN · 27/12/2019 18:02


Why don’t you go out to a friends and give him and his adult children some quality time together? I m sure they can throw a meal together / go to the shops / phone in a pizza .

Don’t stay at home being treated like a servant.

ChampagneCommunist · 27/12/2019 18:04

Yep; hasn't spoken to me properly since Christmas Eve.

chugmonkey · 27/12/2019 18:05

I'm fine thanks, marriage has been dead in the water for years already.
Hope you're bearing up. I've no advice, my marriage has failed after all, just make sure your kids know how much you love them. 😘

happytoday73 · 27/12/2019 18:08

Annoyed with mine today over petty things... he ate a full packet of sour cream pringle crisps with kids and didn't offer me any (even though just upstairs sorting stuff out)..🤬😵. Only noticed when emptying bins...

letsdolunch321 · 27/12/2019 18:09

If you haven't cooked dinner, tough shit. He needs to order in a takeaway for you all and get a cake sorted the fucking idiot.

TheReef · 27/12/2019 18:11

Why hasn't he cooked dinner or made a cake?

letsdolunch321 · 27/12/2019 18:12

He also needs to take his MH meds on a regular basis to get the full effect, not doubling up when he is due to see his kids.

I would not put up with his antics.

happytoday73 · 27/12/2019 18:12

On a more practical note OP.. You have my sympathy... Avoid him or make a list of jobs to split. Sulking like a child would annoy me

winetomorrow · 27/12/2019 18:12

Mine appears to have been on best behaviour but I have no doubt he'll crack and start snapping again so will be continuing to make escape plans in the new year. We're doing family therapy which is a joy (usually consists of husband and his teenage child (my step child) arguing about something silly) but at least our next appointment isn't for weeks!

CodenameVillanelle · 27/12/2019 18:15

You aren't putting the kids first in the least by continuing to inflict this awful man on them. Who gives a damn if you don't want to be divorced twice - he's a shit and you're letting him damage your relationship with your kids. Come on!

PicsInRed · 27/12/2019 18:18

OP, as your kids get older they will blame you for ruining their youth by inflicting this man upon them, ruining their time with you...only for you to turn around and ensure his time with his own kids is special. Your kids will eventually resent and avoid you. Is that what you want?

ProfessionalBoss · 27/12/2019 18:19

I'm glad I read further before automatically saying yabu, because my husband is not perfect by any means, but neither am I, so our relationship is pretty perfect tbh...

Causing problems with your children, blocking them, (how old is the child you're married to?) and expecting you to be Mary frigging Poppins around his children, cooking, (I'm guessing cleaning), AND baking a birthday cake for HIS children after how he treated yours? NOPE!!!

You're absolutely NOT being unreasonable, however I absolutely believe that he is!

frazzledtofook · 27/12/2019 18:20

Yes. Mine works away Mon-Fri and quite frankly I'm noticing he's turned into a massive self centred arsehole. Too much time on his own. Fuck knows where we go from here to be honest.

LagunaBubbles · 27/12/2019 18:20

Men are dicks and I’m not really sure why any woman bothers with them

Bit if a sweeping statement there. Of course all men aren't dicks but if people want to think this to justify being stuck in shitty relationships fair enough. I "bother" with mine because I love him and we have a great relationship. Even after 20 years married. Normal ups and downs of course but can't imagine life without him.

Well done, Yet - that was helpful

Oh so people who are happy with their partners haven't to reply then? Hmm

Redwoodmaz · 27/12/2019 18:21

Mine is a miserable sod.

Yetanotherwinter · 27/12/2019 18:24

@LagunaBubbles looks like it’s just us who are happy. I thank my lucky stars I’ve got a good man 😍

HigherFurtherFasterBaby · 27/12/2019 18:25

YANBU, I’m so done with mine. Nothing major, just lots of little things that aren’t getting any better despite repeated conversations and I’m done repeating myself to a grown ass man.

Fortunately I don’t have DC with him so he can fuck right off.

holly40 · 27/12/2019 18:28

but my kids are always the first “target” because he knows it hurts me.

That's awful. And you should have allowed this to happen, let alone continue!

ProfessionalBoss · 27/12/2019 18:28

@Yetanotherwinter I've got a really great husband too, it looks like quite an exclusive club on mn... xXx

LittleSweet · 27/12/2019 18:28

Yep. He's just laughed at me, which encouraged the dcs to join in, because I liked my old apple phone better than my new phone. Apparently this new phone is much better... it then lead to ds1 being really rude. He then told me I'm overreacting because my new phone is so much better. He thinks that it's alright to make me feel small and stupid if he apologises. I never behave like this to him. So when he came to talk to me about how sorry he is, I pointed out that I chose the dcs Christmas presents and wrapped them and his best friend's present, never point out that any housework he 'does for me' is done half heartedly, (he never cleans the floor around the toilet and sinks, dcs are boys and not always accurate using the toilet) and I do everything for our dcs who have additional needs. They are difficult to manage single handedly. I'm the one who has researched how to help them, fought for therapy and do the advocacy and therapy with the dcs. He never needs to check if he decides to work late as I'm always available for the dcs. I'm their full time carer. He treats the people at work nicer than me. He says the right things but behaves in a different way.

holly40 · 27/12/2019 18:29

Should NOT*

Ninkanink · 27/12/2019 18:31

Not all men are dicks. Not even the vast majority are dicks.

If you’re with a man who doesn’t love, respect, honour and cherish you, and that means demonstrating all those things in deeds and actions, not just in meaningless talk, then fgs don’t keep putting yourself through it. It’s a horrible way to live and it models relationships and behaviours for your children that are really unhealthy.

You do not need to put yourself through it.

LittleSweet · 27/12/2019 18:33

And until I showed him a video on restless legs syndrome (he jerked his legs and arms, it was like sleeping on a trampoline), disrupting your bed partner's sleep on the nhs website, he thought I was being completely unreasonable not being able to get to sleep and asking him to go to the doctors to get medication. He really is selfish.

Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.