Surprise Trip to Center Parcs

[bumum]

Hi All,
So 2019 has been a bit of a rough year for me and my family. I was forced to stop working due to depression and anxiety issues about a year ago, and my poor hubby has been holding the fort on his salary alone. Slowly but surely we have crept into the red and are now a couple of thousand pounds in debt as his salary simply does not cover the basics. We are discussing the prospect of putting our house on the market as our mortgage is just a tad more than we can stretch to at the moment, in the hope of reducing our outgoings by going back to rental.
My family (parents and brother) are aware of our financial difficulties. We have cut back dramatically on our spending including not having a holiday over the past 18 months. My parents and brother are all financially very comfortable and I think they are a bit perplexed by our situation - they simply can't relate to it. Anyway, for Christmas they gave me a surprise gift which is 3 nights away at Center Parcs for us and our two boys. They hoped that a change of scene would help lift my mood and that the boys would enjoy the activities available. Well today, I've actually gone on the website to see what it is all about and have been really shocked to find out how expensive all the activities are! Nothing but the pool is included in what my family have booked for us. We simply can't afford to spend money on any of the activities apart from some bowls and maybe a bit of pottery painting. My 9 year old has already expressed an interest in doing archery or aerial assault courses but they cost £30 a person!! I'm now really panicking that this is going to be a horrific stay for us. We can't afford the activities or to eat out so it will just be a weekend of saying "no sorry" to the kids and the entire weekend at the pool, before we go back to our lodge to self cater. I'm also now wondering why on earth my family would have booked this for us, knowing how financially tight and careful we have had to be since I have stopped work. I'm feeling really upset about it now. I know this has come from a kind place, but I just feel like it's a bit thoughtless and callous of them. They would have no problem paying for countless activities for themselves if they went to such a place. I'm considering asking my mum if there is any way she can cancel the trip - I don't want them to lose out on a deposit, but also it would be pretty pointless paying for it all if we get no enjoyment from it. Am I being unreasonable? Is centre parcs actually totally fine if you don't do any additional activities? Will my boys even notice that they are missing out? Or will it be really great and I'm just making a mountain out of nothing? Any insight or advice into this would be really helpful.

I'm going for new year and this thread has been fab to read! I def plan to self cater and swim! I will also now take shopping and logs too 👍

Have a great time op!

Echo what everyone else has said. We’re lucky enough to have gone a few times. First time fell into the trap of booking activities and eating out - totally unnecessary. Learn from our experience - the pool and bikes (take your own) is all you need and we always self cater. Have a brilliant time - sounds like the break will be welcome for all of you.

Just back from recent trip. We self catered and did none of the extra activities. Kids loved it.

The first time we went to CP we just planned to eat out. We saw hordes of people around us unpacking full shops and we wondered why on earth they would do that... we quickly learned that they were CP pros. :)

Just to warn you, we spent close to £75 on two mugs, a pot aeroplane and a pot dog. Pottery is far and away the most expensive activity!
The cheapest ‘eating out’ experience was Afternoon Tea at Cafe Rouge which was £18 for two people, with unlimited tea and plenty to eat. It wasn’t available on the website but I rang and booked it over the phone.
You can play American Pool for a couple of pounds at the Sports Cafe.

OP honestly you will have a brilliant time. We have been twice, the first time I booked activities thinking it was essential. It was awful, rushing to get to certain places at certain times. The 2nd time we didn't and it was so lovely to just chill and do our own thing, we didn't miss the activities at all! We don't eat out there as the food isn't great imo and is seriously overpriced. The onsite supermarket is fab but quite expensive so you may wish to bring food with you. It is a lovely relaxing place, you will have a ball!

It is a complete rip off though, we switched to going to Duinrell in Holland and it is so much cheaper, even with having to add in flights (we had to get a ferry anyway when going to CP which was pretty expensive).

Have an absolutely wonderful time!

On another note, I also want to urge caution regards selling the house. I know you are too unwell to work, but have you actually tried getting a part time job, sometimes it can actually help once you get over the stress of starting it? Do you have a plan for recovery, any CBT etc? It sounds like a rather miserable existence for you all, depression makes life so overwhelming and miserable, pushing yourself out of your comfort zone actually can help in the longer term. Obviously not always, but I was just curious as to whether you had tried. I really feel for you, depression is such a cruel illness that robs you of your life. I hope you don't take what I am saying the wrong way, this illness is absolutely not your fault, please don't think I am putting any blame on you. However sometimes recovery starts with a change of routine etc.

Such a good holiday and we have never done the additional activities. I cook all our meals before we go like spag bol, curry etc and freeze it so it defrost there. Take bird seed and feed the birds by the lodge, take bikes and wellies and you will be fine filing time not swimming.

You don't really need all the activities of to eat out. The pool is enough (and some bird seed/nuts for the squirrels). Take your own bikes if you have any. Your kids will have a great time. I'm sure that you will too once you get there!

Oh, I will say this though. If you were to splash out on anything, it should be a spa aft for yourself. Relatively inexpensive compared with other activities (around £30 for a 3 HR session). The spa is great and it sounds like you could use it. Skip any other activities. They're definitely overpriced.

Yeah go and enjoy the free stuff. If the kids ask, then just explain you cant afford the extra activities but they can do the pool as much as they like. Loads of people will be in the same position. Enjoy x

You can spend hours and hours watching the wildlife right outside your villa window. We've seen squirrels, ducks, all kinds of birds, rabbits and last time there were little deer on the patio. Early spring is a great time to see wildlife so take a bag of bird food from Wilko and enjoy.

Again we never do the activities. We have and we're disappointed in the past. So lots of swimming, walking and bike rides. Then tea / Barby. Sometimes free kids disco. You honestly don't need to spend anything. Try to look at the positives, it's a lovely place x

Hi OP just posting to echo what a lot of people have said.

We've been loads (at least once a year for the last 12 years). We used to do lots of activities but actually stopped because if you do Fri/Mon we just found ourselves run ragged rather than relaxing!

So I think it's arguably better not booking lots of things tbh as there is plenty to see/do without spending additional money.

Some tips:

1. You get a complimentary kitchen pack with a tea towel, dishcloth, 2 dishwasher tablets, scrub sponge and sachet of washing up liquid. If you're planning on doing a lot of cooking you might was to take more washing up liquid.

1. The kitchens are generally well stocked but I always take a sharp cooks knife, a small non stick pan (the ones supplied aren't non stick and are a nightmare if you want scrambled eggs) and my hand blender if I'm making soup.

1. Don't forget to take salt/pepper plus condiments like ketchup - I always seem to forget and end up buying it! Hot chocolate, snacks and water bottles for when you're out and about are good.

1. All that said I tend to cook something like a large lasagna and pot of chilli before we go, so I don't have to cook so much there - rather re-heat and assemble some salad/nachos etc.

1. If you're going in Feb definitely buy the logs for the fire (a pp has supplied a link) as is to lovely after you've been out for a walk/swim to snuggle up in front of the fire when you get back!

1. Take some favourite DVD's to watch in the evenings.

1. Torches are useful and make sure you have sturdy footwear/waterproofs.

1. Bikes/scooters, swim towels are needed.

I think that's everything! Hope you have a lovely time!

Yes, yes, to corblimey. Book the spa with your birthday money. Book something cheap like video squash for the full family, and then that will be perfect.

Why do you have to do loads of activities? We have been loads of times and not spent a fortune
We take our own food , go swimming play games have a barbecue & just chill
We don’t take our own bikes but friends do
A weekend isn’t long just 2 full days why cram in so full you can’t enjoy it
The table tennis & badminton is cheap but kids need to be told if you can’t afford it x

There should be no problem saying to your kids that you can’t afford to do certain things - it’s a good lesson in the reality of life!

The activities are a bit of a rip off and you can still have a really good time without them.

We go every year for my mum’s birthday - always self catering, and never spend money on activities. Don’t feel hard done by either - pool is brilliant, we spend 5 hours each day there!

OP, i am glad others have been able to share you can still enjoy center Parcs without booking lots of extras. I hope you have a lovely time.

I realise you probably have looked into this so please just ignore if you have, but in case not have you considered applying for ESA if you are too ill to work? If you get put in the ‘possibly capable to work in the near future’ group (official name work-related activity group) the benefit will only last for one year and is rate ks lower than the other group known as the support group, about £78 a week) before your husband’s wage is taken into account, but it would give some extra money for that year. If you are put in the support group then it’s never mean tested. Just an idea and as said understand if you have looked into it.

We go every year and never do activities, however the food is really expensive there and drinks in the pool/snacks will add up.

Do a full shop if you can and take things in with you x

What is wing with spending a lovely 3 days away going for walks and using the pool? What a lovely family you have getting such a nice gift. Personally I wouldn't bother with the other activities even if I had the money for them. It sounds like a great break just the way it is. I really would not ask your mother to cancel it. That would be unkind and rude and why would you not take your family on a break away when your relatives have paid for one for you all? Why not let your DC have fun in the pool and forest?

OP we go to Center Parcs and similar and don’t get any extras. Board games in the chalet, self catering, playing in the pool and going for walks are enough. I hope you and your family have a fantastic time and I hope 2020 brings you better health

We go to Center Parcs every year and never eat out there and never pay for activities. We take all the food with us (meal plan for the week) and do free things - pool, cycling, parks, soft play etc. This year we did pay for one hour game of bowling which was £17 for four of us.
It doesn't have to cost you anything.

Thank you so much for all your replies. I’m so glad I posted this because so many of you have given such useful tips! I feel we’ll be going like pros now!!
Thank you also for all your help regarding the house. To sell will be an absolute last resort as it’s our biggest asset. We worked so hard for so long to save for it, it really would be the last thing we’d do. We lived in rental for years so know all the pitfalls but rental in our area is cheaper than the mortgage (how long that is the case would be another story). Our house is a 3 bedroom semi. The third bedroom is pretty tiny so not a great lodger space and my two boys wouldn’t fit. It takes a single bed and chest of drawers. My oldest has just moved into it as he’s at an age where he wants some privacy and the age gap is more of an issue, so I’d rather he has the space even though it is titchy. I’d love to be working in any capacity (I always have, even when the boys were babies) but it simply is not an option at the moment, the smallest thing triggers my anxiety and then I have a panic attack. I never used to be like this and I find it really embarrassing and frustrating ). I am receiving counselling but the issues are deep rooted and complex (including abuse as a child, a still birth and almost losing my eldest to a rare disease as a baby). so it’s not going to be all fixed any time soon, but I am committed to getting better one step at a time. I’ve been on 3 different medications but all have made me feel worse rather than better so I’ve given up on that) but it is delaying my recovery. I am very negative at the moment, I struggle to take things at face value and accept people being nice. I am wary and untrusting. In short I lose perspective easily of people’s motivations, which is why I posted - I knew I’d get perspective here about the gift and I have, so thank you!

Ah enjoy I'm off to CP on Friday, we don't do any extra activities, apart from sometimes badminton, we have been going every year (sometimes up to 3x a year when we had lots of money but now once a year) since our eldest was a baby (now 18yrs). You will have the most wonderful time, I just love watching the wildlife, riding bikes and in the pool.
Get organised before hand , make a little wildlife spotting sheet for your children, take monkey nuts ....... the squirrels love them and will come right up to your villa door. There is a beach area at some sites, but cold in feb but still fun to walk on, lots of the eating areas have play areas , the sports bar and country club you can sit in without ordering anything and the children can play. It really doesn't need to be expensive xx