Surprise Trip to Center Parcs

[bumum]

Hi All,
So 2019 has been a bit of a rough year for me and my family. I was forced to stop working due to depression and anxiety issues about a year ago, and my poor hubby has been holding the fort on his salary alone. Slowly but surely we have crept into the red and are now a couple of thousand pounds in debt as his salary simply does not cover the basics. We are discussing the prospect of putting our house on the market as our mortgage is just a tad more than we can stretch to at the moment, in the hope of reducing our outgoings by going back to rental.
My family (parents and brother) are aware of our financial difficulties. We have cut back dramatically on our spending including not having a holiday over the past 18 months. My parents and brother are all financially very comfortable and I think they are a bit perplexed by our situation - they simply can't relate to it. Anyway, for Christmas they gave me a surprise gift which is 3 nights away at Center Parcs for us and our two boys. They hoped that a change of scene would help lift my mood and that the boys would enjoy the activities available. Well today, I've actually gone on the website to see what it is all about and have been really shocked to find out how expensive all the activities are! Nothing but the pool is included in what my family have booked for us. We simply can't afford to spend money on any of the activities apart from some bowls and maybe a bit of pottery painting. My 9 year old has already expressed an interest in doing archery or aerial assault courses but they cost £30 a person!! I'm now really panicking that this is going to be a horrific stay for us. We can't afford the activities or to eat out so it will just be a weekend of saying "no sorry" to the kids and the entire weekend at the pool, before we go back to our lodge to self cater. I'm also now wondering why on earth my family would have booked this for us, knowing how financially tight and careful we have had to be since I have stopped work. I'm feeling really upset about it now. I know this has come from a kind place, but I just feel like it's a bit thoughtless and callous of them. They would have no problem paying for countless activities for themselves if they went to such a place. I'm considering asking my mum if there is any way she can cancel the trip - I don't want them to lose out on a deposit, but also it would be pretty pointless paying for it all if we get no enjoyment from it. Am I being unreasonable? Is centre parcs actually totally fine if you don't do any additional activities? Will my boys even notice that they are missing out? Or will it be really great and I'm just making a mountain out of nothing? Any insight or advice into this would be really helpful.

My dd is 11 and we have been to center Parcs several times. Paying for activities especially in the winter is pretty unnecessary and inconvenient tbh and could spoil your time there. You’ll be clock watching and the kids probably won’t want to leave the pool. I’d consider putting the money aside and taking your dcs to an a outdoor pursuits centre or similar in the summer holidays. It will be cold and wet and the activities may not even be running. The pool is incredibly warm and it’s entirely possible to spend all day inside.

You can go to the pool (dome), then leave, have lunch and go back in the afternoon / evening. It’s open from 10 until 9 pm. I always take drinks and non messy snacks with me to the pool. I’m not sure if it’s actually allowed. But I never create mess. There is usually a Costa and burger bar inside but it’s very expensive.

As others have said, take your own food if on a budget. The supermarket is more expensive but not ridiculously so and maybe the size of the average coop, there is a lot of selection. Remember to take a packed lunch for when you arrive as you can’t access the accommodation until 3. If you run on the cold side, take an extra blanket for the bed as the duvets aren’t very thick.

This really is a lovely gift.

As for your house, I do agree with a pp, who said to be careful about selling and going into rental. If money is that tight, could you bring yourself to get a lodger?

We go once a year and do very few paid things. Outdoor bowls is about £6 and you can all do it. Geochashing is cheaper too, just pay for one of you to do it then all go on the treasure hunt. If your kids are a bit older there's nothing more exciting than a night swim! Early tea then head to the pool in the dark. It's amazing seeing it all lit up. It's a highlight of our holiday! My family get the kids vouchers for center Parcs for birthdays so they get to pick an activity each. Is that a possibility or do you go sooner?

You don't need to spend money at CP to have a good time, swim, take bikes, take your normal food and eat in. Relax and enjoy. :)

You don’t need to do any of the extra activities. We went a few times when the children were younger and spent all our time in the pool area where there is lots to do. We also enjoyed walking in the woods. We self catered, bringing all our food with us and the most we bought was a coffee at the end of a walk. What a lovely gift from your family, go and have a wonderful time.

I think it is a very thoughtful gift. Your family sound very caring. I echo what others have said about not selling your house!

Wow what a lovely gift! Just to echo the others the pool area is fab! They also have little hot dog stands in some of them so you could always just do a portion of chips /hot dog cheaply so it feels as though you're eating out without the expense of a full meal!

Be careful of pottery it's bloody expensive not to book but the actual ceramic moulds. Also don't do on your last day as they put it in the kiln overnight and will have to pay for postage if you can't collect it.

We did a trail thing where you go out on the bikes around the site to collect clues. Was great fun and not expensive. But honestly they don't need it! Great play areas etc there too.

Also I would speak to your parents about the plans to sell the house. Could they help? Or ask the bank to extend the mortgage period? It's so hard to get back on the ladder once you're off

Sorry you’re having a hard time. I have been to centre parcs a lot , and the first time my husband and I went together was about four years ago and he’d never been before . He had just finished uni , we were living off my wages and In a small rented house saving up for our own and we had no money . The rent was ridiculous and it was only one bedroom but the landlord over priced it .
Dh was really reluctant to go to center parcs because of how expensive he’s heard it is but I assured him you don’t even have to do anything to have fun .
He agreed .
We went to aldi , bought loads of food (we went for 5 days), took some movies etc . Just being in a change of scenery is amazing and you won’t believe how long you can spend in the pool : we spent a whole day there , and only came out for a bit of food that we kept in our lockers !

We went again this year after our wedding, now being able to afford to do things as he’s working and we’re in our house with mortgage less than our previous rent , and not gonna lie we had more fun on the time we went with no money than when we went for our honeymoon .
Have fun and enjoy every minute xx

Enjoy OP, honestly, look forward to it!

I loved Center Parcs and it wasn't the activities that made the trip, it was being with close ones in a lovely tranquil place.

The best parts were cycling through the woods, self catering (bbqs) at the lodge, and the swimming pool was good fun.

You could take some board games for the evening and they do have free evening entertainment too.

I really would just look forward to a change of scenery in a stress free environment.

Just prep the kids that there is no extras - but take your bikes and the pool is wonderful!

We never do paid activities at centre parcs. I take a food shop with me, the kids spend 3 hours in the pool each morning and then in the afternoon we explore the woods/hang out on the beach at the lake/chill in the lodge/go to the play parks - it sounds like the change of scene will be great for you. We do it very cheaply and it's my favourite holiday of the year because it's so easy.

I’m not a fan of centreparcs but we have been a couple of times in group holidays. Like you I was shocked at the price of activities so we didn’t do them. The villas, grounds and pools are nice enough that a family with kids can fill their days very happily without paying for extras. Bring lots of food/drinks/snacks with you and maybe some board games and DVDs for cosy evenings in and you will have a great time.

I think this could end up being a great present if you go into it with a positive mindset. A change of scene might be just what you and your family need.

There's no need to spend on activities there.

Echo what everyone else has said, we stick to the cheaper activities - a badminton court is about £10 I think and all of you can join in. If you eat out at all, just do the pancake house as most of the other restaurants are chains you could eat at any other time.

Also maybe stock up on some surprise sweets too, perhaps something they wouldn’t usually get, before you go and don’t tell the kids, all the shops are boutique style and eye wateringly expensive. The sweet shop is so very tempting but could cause a disappointment for them so have something up your sleeve.

The supermarket is adequate but overpriced.

I’ll also second what a pp said about going into rental you may well end up paying the same or more for a smaller unsuitable sized property.

Look on the positive side - you have family who give a shit about you . Many don't mentally ill or not. Focus on that - trip will be nice regardless of doing the other stuff.

I would hang onto your house, ask the mortgage provider to extend the term and your payments will be lower. You can then shrink the term again when your circumstances improve. Private rents will only ever rise and mortgages become more affordable over time.

The trip will be lovely (some years we’ve done lots of activities and some years hardly any) and the pool, playgrounds and biking are the remembered ones. My only thought is whether you can move the dates to summer as the free outdoor ones will be not great in Feb if it’s raining and cold.

We love CP! We have done on a shoestring as well as blown the budget. One was funded by EBay sales of the kids outgrown clothes!! Top tips
-Plan food, breakfast, lunch & dinner. Fridge is small so I try to cater dry goods etc but 3 days is easier! It also takes away an element of stress/anxiety. Tesco click and collect en route if there is one nearby.

• Download or take RSPB bird watcher sheet, great activity for DC at this age! It's full of great finds.
• Pool is a whole AM /PM activity, we arrive early / leave late as you have lodge entry / exit but access to CP for whole day.
• There are lots of wildlife, take the drawing so kids can capture and also use to make a nice thank you card for your family.
• Small activities are more reasonable footgolf, badminton etc.
• Still dark in Feb early, take torches and reflectors for all, a night walk and look up to the stars! This is still one of my childhood favourite memories.
• I collect extra activity sheets and colouring from places like Pizza Express etc and take these.
• Do a family quiz & wrap up silly things as prizes, I do little lollies for kids and a jar of DH fave jam etc. Everyone gets a prize!!
• Take flasks, water bottles and maybe a cheeky hip flask

IF you can save or plan or EBay before then, please treat yourself to the half day spa with zero guilt, your DC & DH need you to get what your family intended, a lift in spirits and time to focus. It's corny but the Spa is so lovely and genuinely great place to relax with a good book, no treatment needed. You can usually get a little demo session and there are creams and sprays everywhere for free! Your family wanted to relieve your anxiety and I'm sure they would be genuinely upset if they felt they had added to it, it's a lovely thing to give you and plenty time to plan. Please enjoy

Take (easy) meals with you - the kitchen in the lodges is good, microwave and oven.

For 3 days you don't need to do anything extra - take bikes or scooters with you, make full use of the pool - it's free!

Go for a nature walk - there is a nature area in most of them.

Look at seeing (depends which one you are going to) if you could book street carts - its a cheap activity and fun for all ages.

Lastly - and I mean this most sincerely, you need to get you head around your budget, it is almost NEVER cheaper to rent.... I realise you are a bit in denial having lost one income, but you must work out where your money is going. You may be better speaking to your mortgage lender and having a payment holiday, while you get yourself back in a situation where you can bring money in. Selling to free up capital will only cause you to continue to overspend.

If you aren't going to be able to work, or do this, your husband needs to take over and sort this out. It needs to be very radical, ditching phones, selling things you don't need, switching energy providers, going to freeview, amongst many other things.

You will have a great time. The pool is great and the kids will be knackered from that, take some nature walks, activities for the evening. Bring food from home, the on parc shop is very expensive. If you are having a fire, take some marshmallows for the kids to roast. Take some monkey nuts for the squirrels, the wildlife isn’t that wild, we had them take them from our hands. Take some seeds for the birds.

Don’t worry about booking expensive activities, there is enough to keep them occupied. You could buy some cheap archery kits to take with you and they could play in the garden area of your chalet.

Hope you all have a lovely time.

We have been several times and the activities really are not necesary! The pool is so fantastic and will be enough fun. Take kids bikes if you can, but again, there is plenty of nice walking and the one we went to had a few playgrounds. Also, take 3 days of meals and cereals with you and just eat in your lodge. It really is a relaxing break and I am sure you will really enjoy it. You won't need to spend extra money if you take food.

You don't have to do the activities. Don't feel worried about saying no to your children. They need to realise that they can't do/have everything.

Kids will be happy by the pool, and take plenty of food with you so you don't have to eat out.

UnrelentingFruitScoffer, would say this if the op had had to stop work due to a physical health issue rather than a mental health one?

If she had had to cease working due to breast cancer or ms would you show more compassion?

You can go up to the desk when you get there and ask them to highlight the free activities. I’ve done it before and they didn’t mind. You can also ride the land train and do the walks and playgrounds if the weather is ok. Things like the disco in the evening is free and they have sport on in the bar area with colouring. They also had a small soft play that was included in the one we went to.
Eating out is mega expensive so do avoid this.
If you prep the children in advance about what you will be able to do, then hopefully it not be a weekend of saying no.

I would repeat what everyone else has said about not selling your house. Rents often cost as as much as a mortgage and it’s wasted money without even factoring in the lack of security that is inherent in a private rental property.

If you are really struggling financially and don’t expect improvements in the near future look at restructuring your mortgage. If you extend the term from the standard 25 years (or whatever you have left) to a 30 or 35 year loan the repayments will decrease. Or you could look into switching to an interest only mortgage - these loans aren’t a good idea as a long term plan but it could get you over a 4 or 5 year ‘hump’. You could do either of these things as a short term fix and then restructure again when your finances improve. Ask your lender for options and if they can’t help, contact a mortgage broker.