to fancy someone else even though i am married

[NeedSomeExcitement]

i fancy another bloke and have even told my DH about him - he just laughed and said he wouldn't mind if i slept with this other bloke but i reckon he would.

would it be bad to sleep with someone else?

there once was a time, back in the days of yore, when premarital sex was frowned upon. There was also a time when divorce was difficult to obtain, and again was not 'respectable'. I'm very glad that those days have gone.

Given that we are all (just about) now free to have active sex lives when not married, why get married if you don't intend to be faithful?

I just don't get it. If you want to have lots of partners, do so, have a blast, but why get married?

when I got married I stood up in front of the people who mattered to me and made a vow to stay with dh. And I should hate to have lied

exactly MB - I would not have got married if I didn't mean my vows.

Yes - have to agree, sorry. The marriage vows do have meaning if you aren't religious. If monogamy isn't your cuppa tea, don't get married, or at least don't use the standard vows. (Which is not to imply that all unmarried couples are shag-happy swingers of course ).

I'm sure the OP is trolling but if not, I have known people apparently perfectly happy in open relationships (albeit with some slightly mad clauses attached as they were both bisexual, so partners of the opposite gender were off limits, partners of the same gender were fine ... ). Not married, as it happens.

"would it be bad to sleep with someone else?" errrrr - pretty much almost certainly yes.

Needsomeexcitement - was all those people trip trapping over your bridge enough excitement for you??

my thoughts exactly

Just to add, I'm not religious, but if you commit to someone enough to make vows, then imho they shouldn't be broken, whatever meaning they have, religious or civil.

The standard vows say "to love, honour and obey" (or there abouts) and imo, if you vow to love someone, then that doesn't mean "love them when it suits, but go find a random bloke to bump ugly when you feel like it". And there's nothing honourable about cheating.

And as someone else has already said on this thread, just take a look around on MN to see the devastation affairs can have on families.

WHY would you want to do that to any one?

I agree, why get married if you want to play away. Maybe the OP is just bored of her marriage and needs to pay a visit to a marriage guidance counsellor for advice on how to 'improve' their marriage.

No ones marriage is perfect but you don't swan off with someone else at the first sign of problems.

Try and work on what is wrong in your relationship before shagging someone else.

What is the point of getting married if you just want to shag around?

Of course your DH would mind. How would you feel if it was him wanting to go off and sleep with someone else? Because if you did, he would have to, and where would it stop? If you need some excitement, how about a dirty weekend with your DH?
I fancy other blokes (George Clooney, Owen Wilson and a few more) but even if they were attainable I would never act on it! Marriage vows (or even making a commitment without marriage) are important and shouldn't be taken lightly.

yes yabu

o grow up - you would be annoyed if your husband fancied someone else...what oges around comes aound do u really think u can have a blameless feck and no one gets hurt

if your vows mean so little to you then you really should not be married,
do think of the example you are setting your kids.

Fancying is fine, f*cking is a whole other thing entirely.

The vicar who married us said that window shopping was just fine, and it'd be a sad day when we stopped, the only problems came from trying on.
I stuck to this, just a shame my ex-hubbie didn't.