To ask your biggest parenting fails to make me feel better about mine today

[GlummyMcGlummerson]

I feel so guilty I could vomit. I’ve been sobbing all day (I know, I need to get a grip).

Taking DS (2) to nursery, as usual I put my handbag on the passenger seat of my car (which has the keyless entry and a stop/start button rather than an ignition) then strapped him in behind the passenger seat. Then, as usual, shut his door to walk round to the drivers’ side. This has never been an issue - it’s easier than keeping hold of my key in my hand while I strap a wriggling toddler into a car seat - but today for some reason the car locked itself. Long story short, the fire brigade had to come out and smash a window. DS has been in the car for about 20 minutes at his point and was seriously distressed. He’s fine now, but I’m a mess. I wouldn’t usually call emergency service BTW I did initially call the AA but they said up to 60 minutes and they couldn’t get hold of the nearest mechanic. There’s no way I was letting him stay there for so long.

I told my mum and she was horrified, told me to expect social services on my doorstep ready to take him away in the meantime I have ordered a spare key (at £235, thank god for Christmas bonus) and a new car window comes Friday (Merry arsing Christmas to me)

In the vain hope of me feeling less shit please regale me with anything similar you’ve done, please say it’s not just me!

I dropped my son off at a holiday club 1 and he was actually booked in to holiday club 2 next door (both at adjacent posh schools, in the holiday). They fucked up too tbh in that #1 didn't sign him in properly or they'd have known he wasn't booked in. Got a phone call from the other one wanting to know where he was and if he was coming and of course I absolutely crapped myself wondering where the hell he was. And panicking saying I'd just dropped him off...

All's well that ends well - He was happy as Larry. We collectively figured it out and he had a lovely time at #2 that day and it would have been 20 quid a day more expensive with far naicer activities. They waived the fee once we established what had happened. I felt so crap though, at basically not noticing and registering the actual signage on the gates.

Don't beat yourself up OP you did everything you could to solve the problem and I've not got a spare key either, I'd have been stuck too

Sorry OP your mum was horrible saying that!! I accidentally locked my daughter in my car but as I visiting my DB who lived in a dodgy area he called upon his NDN who used the old trick of a wire coat hanger to open the door! I was mortified but so relieved that I didn't have to call the fire brigade.

I'm curious as to how the fire brigade got her out? I think I would have just broke a window to be honest.

When pregnant with second child, (I suffered HG and was a total wreck) iIaccidently fell asleep watching tv with my two year old. My husband walked in to me fast asleep and the 2 year old watching the hanging scene from 12 years a slave. I cringe so hard thinking about it.

@ IpanemaGallina thank goodness for our older children!

What a horrible thing for you mum to say it was an accident! Accidents happen!

Read “Alfie gets in first” by Shirley Hughes. It happens to all of us. We are not perfect!

@Bunnybigears
The fire brigade smashed the window

My DC were born only 12 months apart, so the first couple of years I was on automatic pilot and totally punch drunk due to being sleep deprived. I remember putting them in their pram and the collars with leads on the dogs then set off. I trotted down the road and after half a mile, I felt something was missing. It took a further minute until I finally realised that I was walking by myself. I legged it back with a still unmatched speed and opened the front door huffing and puffing. I was greeted by several pairs of accusatory eyes and spent the remainder of the day apologising to them all.

fuck off and go back to bed that’s cracked me up

Well if you want to hear some parenting fails -
Ds1 has been to A&E three times. The worst was when he was playing in the school playground after school and fell off a 2 foot high slide. Fail 1 - the children aren't allowed on the equipment after school, I should have stopped him.
He told me he was sure he'd broken his arm. He's a natural drama llama so I didn't believe him. He could move his fingers, I gave his arm a squeeze and it seemed fine so we set off to walk home. That's parenting fail 2. Half way home he turned grey and almost passed out. I had ds2 asleep in his buggy and a groggy 6 year old. I had to phone my mum for a lift.
In A&E, yes it was broken. Second day of term that was.
Two days later - ds2 suddenly becomes distressed repeating "I putted it mummy, I putted it and I can't get it back" over and over. I did get a bit crabby as it took some time to ascertain exactly what he'd putted and where.
Parenting fail 3 - a 2 1/2 year old should not be allowed near normal Lego. They do stupid things like putting a Lego stud up their nose. Too high up for me to hook out, I also tried covering the unaffected nostril and huffing in his mouth but no joy.
Ended up in the local walk in clinic where they extracted it. The doctor said he'd have one go, but if he failed we'd have to go to A&E. I'd spent enough time there to last me a life time.
I have many other fails. They've rolled off beds, run off in car parks and just generally put themselves in harm's way more times than I can count. Ds2 didn't sleep through until past 3 years old, so that's my excuse.

@Notsure94

That's actually hilarious although probably not when you were shitting yourself wondering where the hell DS was.

I think your mother had a spectacular parenting fail you just had an accident which you responsibly resolved in the best way possible

NomNomNomNom yes I can see the funny side now eight years on or so! No one died and all's well that ends well. If anyone judges mothers they don't really grasp how relentless it is and how you have to stay absolutely present all the bloody time... I think we do a good job in general!

DS1 was not a good sleeper, and also went through a very irritating phase of shoving his fingers in my mouth while he fed.

Up feeding him in the night (again). He expressed his joy by shoving his fingers in my mouth (again). In a fit of exhausted irritation... I bit them. Hard.

I'll never forget the screech. Of course, on top of being a major parenting fail he was now hysterical and so was I, so it was a long time before either of us got back to sleep.

I have shut DS's fingers in the door twice and tripped and fallen on top of him while going up stairs with him in my arms.

When he was about 2 I dozed off on the sofa one afternoon, woke up to loud noise of car horns honking and somehow knew immediately what was happening - we lived on a busy road across from a park and he had opened the front door and was standing on the doorstep. Very grateful to those drivers.
So 1) fell asleep when I was supposed to be looking after him and
2) didn't lock the door

I have done exactly the same! Luckily was at home and hubby was there so he managed to smash the window,

I have also shut my DD thumb in the car door before! I was mortified and felt physically sick, she did scream but luckily no damage to any fingers! I still shudder to this day thinking about it,

Your mum does sound a bit harsh, maybe she said it a bit 'tongue in cheek?'

Locked my two year old in the house when I nipped out to get something from the car and didn't have the house keys attached (it was a courtesy car)...woke my neighbours up crying at 9am on a Sunday in the pissing rain and they called the fire brigade out who put their big ladder up to my loft conversion window and let me back in. Two year old was excited to meet fireman Sam

I did this when I was a nanny. New Ford fiesta... Apparently they lock the doors themselves! I only lasted 2 weeks in that job

Rushing out the house with screaming one year old. Door closed behind me and I've left my keys which I need to unlock the door and get back in.

Took ds to park, playing round go back to my car which has rolled forward and hit someone else's car. I'd not put my hand break on. By some absolute miracle no damage was done to the car it hit. Never made that mistake again.

Honest mistake op, your mum has been very harsh.

Locked my daughter in the car she’d have been about 18 months . She was strapped in her car seat . Police called and everything . Your not the first you won’t be the last

Not got children myself but know of plenty fails. I've got a scar on my lower lip because as a toddler I fell into a door being shut and ripped off the lip. Mum's cousin got locked out of the house by her two year old while hanging washing out; the two year old went to get the biscuit tin, leaving the cellar door open for crawling brother to fall down head first... A friend has a crooked toe because her nurse mother told her of course it wasn't broken so stop complaining. A friend had a Houdini of a two-three year old so slept with the house keys under her pillow. Houdini managed to make his way out through a window and was found by the police playing in the snow in the early hours; he refused to tell the police where he lived so they had to take him to the station and wait for the panicked telephone call a few hours later.

None of these involved social services so your mother was just being a total twat. Is she always this cruel?

Thanks everyone, this has really cheered me up - and some did make me laugh especially the dog stepping on the key

And yes my mum is usually a cow. And she NEVER did anything wrong. But that's because she didn't work, you see, like a Proper Mum. I have a Lovely Little Job (I'm a director, albeit a part time one, but it's always described as a 'lovely little job') which gets in the way of being a good mum. But it seems to make her happy when I fail, so every cloud 🙄

I did exactly this when my eldest was a baby and my husband did it once too. We were able to get the spare key but had to get our spare house key from in-laws first on both occasions. It has happened lots of people but I can promise you that when you do it once you will be so hyper aware from now on that it couldn't possibly happen again!

Im sorry but I laughed a bit at that.

It’s easily done and happens more than you realise. Social services are not going to bother with this.

Have a large gin and remember tomorrow is a new day