AIBU - Christmas opening present time

[myhandsareverycold]

We are a blended family. 20 year old step daughter home from university. We normally (11 + 2 x13) get up around 7:30am, open stockings then do main Father Christmas stuff around 10. We have our children every second Christmas, this one bring ours. This year eldest is working Christmas Day and wants stockings and main presents opened before she leaves for work at 7:30. I had proposed to do stockings at 7am then the rest around 12 when she gets back. Dad is not at all happy and feels we should fit in with working daughter. Ive offered to reimburse her wages for Christmas Day so we can have a relaxed day but she is being so honerable and doesn't want to let anyone down. Am I being dreadfully unreasonable. Any other solutions that you lovely people can see?

I am not allowed up until 7.15 to open presents. Come from a family of early risers. We have the in laws staying this year and I am definitely sending the 2 year old in to wake them up! DH is very excited for me to work a day shift on Chrisgmas day so he can get a lie in -good luck with 2 babies-

I think your suggestion is fair.

Why should you fit in with her, and she not fit in with you?

I think the 20 year old is being selfish and very immature. It's perfectly reasonable to wait until she gets home at 12. Many people do this

This. She’s 20, not 10. She’ll live. If the others won’t get up at 7 normally, don’t make them. She’s an adult, she needs to learn that the world doesn’t revolve around her. Harsh, but I don’t see why 3 younger kids have to have their day disrupted because she’s working.

It’ll be so much nicer to wait until she gets home
Spend the morning watching Christmas films, preparing lunch together, breakfast... you’ll still have all the excitement of opening your gifts while it’s all over for the rest of us, especially those who have been dragged out of bed by young dc at an ungodly hour and want to go back to bed already!

Of course dc can wait til the afternoon. no question.

"Why did you make them wait all bloody day for their presents??"

You might as well say 'why did you make them wait all bloody month for their presents' - because you do 'make them wait' all through December, don't you - and whatever time they have always opened them seems absolutely normal to them, as all families make up their own traditions.

When my children were young, they had a well-filled stocking from Santa first thing in the morning which had to be shown around once the adults were up, and each item examined and exclaimed over.

Chocolate coins and clementines for breakfast, food preps, carols on the radio, much bustle and excitement, TV on for festive Christmas colour. Lunch with the whole family sitting round the table, crackers, etc.

THEN when all is cleared away it's Present Time.

We always thought it by far the best and most fun way to do it, as it makes the whole day full of one exciting happening after another, with the present-opening the last and perhaps best thing in a day of good things.

OP's solution of waiting till 12 seems absolutely fine to me.

when I've had to work Christmas morning we have done stockings 6.30/7am before I go and then main presents when I get home late morning.
Trying to do everything before 7.30 would be such a rush and anti-climax for the for rest of the day.
If she's insisting to open before leaving, why doesn't she open hers before she leaves and the rest of you wait until she's home?

Thanks for all your replies. OH says my idea doesn't work so everyone up at 7am!

Happy Christmas to you all!

over rule him op, we have your back!

err, why doesn’t your idea not work?

Get up at 7, take it as it comes,

So much micromanaging if Christmas Day.

She will have to leave before much is opened anyway.

What? You're completely reasonable OP.

You're saying the 11 and 13yos are willing to wait until noon, so the 20yo opens her gifts with the family but the 20yo can't wait, even though she'll be busy at work? Is that right? I don't get it!

Just get up at 7, it’s not going to kill you to adapt this once. At 20 she should be allowed to open her presents when she wants surely. I think you are being a bit mean for the sake of being a bit mean. There isn’t any rule saying you can’t open them all at once.

Can't she open hers but not insist that everyone also opens theirs? She would surely want the rest of her family to enjoy a relaxed day? If she doesn't then she's being a bit of a brat...

She's an adult. Of course she can wait until 12 to open her presents - you all can.

In our family we have always waited to open the main presents anyway, only stockings get opened when you wake up.

Otherwise it's just a frenzy. You need to teach respect and good manners!!!

Well your dh will realise on the day that it doesn’t work. The thirteen year olds are not going to leap out of bed at 7, and 30 minutes is not long enough anyway.
He sounds very bossy by the way.

Yes but he doesn’t get to determine what YOUR children do.

Fuck then and do what you want

it's a bit daft to open all presents that early - I'm with PP why not stockings and a smallish present before work, then the rest when she gets back?

Just get up at 7, it’s not going to kill you to adapt this once.

even my youngest kids don't get up at 7 on Christmas Day! And no one is going to shake them awake. Let the OP sleep in peace

how old are you Doggodogington?

It’s fascinating to hear what everyone’s Christmas days are like! We had family staying one year with little ones when I was around 19. I’d worked in a pub Christmas Eve and gone out afterwards only got an hours kip before the kids were sent to wake me up. I thought I was dying!

But Christmas is all about the kids tbf put it to a family vote!

one thing occurs, OP: what do the other children say? the 2 year old probably doesn't care, but the other two must have an opinion?

otherwise: DH and SD get up early, the rest of you do your thing...?

If everything's opened by 7:30 you'll have some very anti-climaxed children by 12:00.

This really wouldn't bother me. I think either is acceptable. It wouldn't be all over after opening the presents. There is always the Xmas bath/shower with the Xmas toiletries, the family game with any board/video games given, the trying on of any clothing gifts, the putting the gifts away and off course preparing of Xmas food and laying the table, organising music etc.

I'm confused how old are the other children?

Why isn't the dad happy with half the pressys in the morning and then half when his daughter gets home from work ?

I think that some presents before she leaves, and some
When she returns makes the most sense. Why does your husband get to decide the order of the day? Are the other children both of your or just yours?