AIBU - Christmas opening present time

[myhandsareverycold]

We are a blended family. 20 year old step daughter home from university. We normally (11 + 2 x13) get up around 7:30am, open stockings then do main Father Christmas stuff around 10. We have our children every second Christmas, this one bring ours. This year eldest is working Christmas Day and wants stockings and main presents opened before she leaves for work at 7:30. I had proposed to do stockings at 7am then the rest around 12 when she gets back. Dad is not at all happy and feels we should fit in with working daughter. Ive offered to reimburse her wages for Christmas Day so we can have a relaxed day but she is being so honerable and doesn't want to let anyone down. Am I being dreadfully unreasonable. Any other solutions that you lovely people can see?

I can’t see why you wouldn’t wait for her to come home - I think your compromise is perfect. No-one needs to rush, you’ve opened something, but the rest can be done when she is with you after work at home and you’ve all got time. Don’t do any while she’s not there as that isn’t fair either.

Sorry but are you saying that an 11 and 2x 13 year olds can't wait til 12 to open their presents because of the magic?

I'm with your stepdaughter.

Stockings before she goes and then main presents when she comes back. We don't normally start opening main presents until about 2:30 anyway.

I think your compromise is perfect.
Even with much smaller children I'd do this (my husband sometimes works Christmas Day so we are flexible with present opening time). I like the idea if one 'main' present the younger ones can play with/use during the morning while they wait.

Sorry but are you saying that an 11 and 2x 13 year olds can't wait til 12 to open their presents because of the magic?

Give the OP another try, that's not what's being said at all.

The 20 year old is the one who wants everything opened before 7:30. OP suggested just stockings and then they all wait to open the rest of the presents once the 20 year old gets home. It's OP's husband and step-daughter who have said no to this and are demanding everyone opens all gifts before 7:30.

*Sorry but are you saying that an 11 and 2x 13 year olds can't wait til 12 to open their presents because of the magic?

I'm with your stepdaughter*

I'm not sure that you are.

We open one each in the morning, and the rest after Christmas dinner around 5. 7 is way too early. Good that she works though! I’d encourage that.

She's 20 and she can't wait a few hours for her presents? Tell her to grow up! and that other peoples' presents are not her concern.

We do stockings in the morning then main presents after lunch...

Shes an adult at university she can open her presents on her own surely?

If she's old enough to work on Christmas day then it's not really about her. The priority is the younger children. Your suggestion sounds reasonable. We never open our presents before Christmas lunch anyway, even as adults. As children the stockings in the morning would keep up going until dinnertime, and would also prolong the excitement of the day. YANBU.

Stockings before she goes and then main presents together when she gets home.
I'd presume the 13 yr olds (at least, potentially the 11 yr old) would be more than happy to lie in until 10ish and get up and open their stockings then, then wait for her to do the main presents.

Ridiculous to rush through everything before 7.30. Didn't even allow them to do that when they were at the 'waking up ridiculously early' stage.
(Speaking as a parents of adult dc and a teen)

It’s ridiculous to insist everyone is dragged out of bed at what 6/630 just because one person wants to open gifts early. Good luck getting teens up that early in the holidays anyway!

Why on earth does dh think the entire household should fit in with her rather than she fit with the rest of her family? By going along with her suggestion everyone is probably going to be tired and rushing to exchange gifts in accordance with her schedule. Yanbu.

She is an adult....she can wait, prioritise the kids and don't make them rush.

Everybody waits until 12 noon to open anything. Everyone has a nice lie in, a leisurely breakfast and helps with dinner prep, laying table etc whilst waiting.

If the younger children still believe in Santa and want to open their stockings early then they should be allowed but your eldest misses out watching this, tough luck for agreeing to work on Christmas Day. Everyone needs to compromise.

If you rush to open everything by 7.30 that's half the fun of the day gone.

7.30 is much too early for opening presents. Wait until after work and then open presents in a relaxed environment, it's too early for the other children too.

I’d hate this. I keep mine for as long as possible, and often keep some to open on the days after Christmas. Opening them all by half 7 would be really disappointing.

If she wants to open them all first thing then fine. Let the others only open stockings then wait til she's home for the rest.

I worked Christmas Day a few years on the bounce from age 16 thru 21 and wouldn't have dreamt of asking for everyone to do presents before I went early doors in the morning!! Everyone was happy to wait till I got home around 3pm and then we did presents as a family before having our Christmas meal.

I'm with you OP - stockings in the morning then presents all together when she gets back

She's an adult. Surely she can open her presents when she gets home.

I’d have laughed so loudly at the suggestion of a 20yo having a strop about Xmas pressies!

If she’s so keen on babyish xmas traditions, maybe she should go to bed early the night before too? Does she know Santa doesn’t come if you don’t?

At 20 I was hosting Xmas lunch for 12 at my own house. Doubt I was too concerned about ‘my presents’. Things certainly have changed.

Perhaps another idea is immersing her completely in all the adult side of Xmas. Wrapping for others, all the food prep, cleaning the house, etc. She’ll be too tired to get up early for presents. Just like a normal grownup.

I can't believe how many people don't open presents until after lunch!

But yeah there's going to have to be some compromise on her part too.
Stockings early, Xmas breakfast and a Xmas film, by the time that's done it'll almost be time for her to come home. Then presents for everyone, Xmas dinner and naps all round

I agree with the majority;stockings before she goes to work and everyone's present pending when she gets back.we have always opened presents after lunch anyway as the morning is busy.

Slightly different and obviously it depends on how you do Christmas, but when my mum use to work Christmas day we use to open the presents from Santa before she went to work and then my two siblings would go back to bed, while I did the Christmas dinner memory might be slightly fuzzy and Dad did the christmas dinner while I played

Then all the other presents would be done before lunch and after mum got back

I bet OP is the one who put all the effort I to wrapping presents, choosing them etc. Don't want all that effort to be for 30m of fun before 730. Bonkers.

We don't open our tree gifts until.after lunch! Stockings before work, fine and the rest of the gifts after work (unless it something like a bike which the kids will want to try out immediately). 20 is old enough to wait for presents.