Being a woman v being a man

[Alanis126]

Ok I live in the wealthy West and fully realise that many many women in the world have it way worse than men and suffer at the hands of some of them. I realise F to M trans people exist, but overall I would never want to be anything other than a woman mainly due to the emotional restrictions of the patriarchy on men. I wondered how others felt? It'd be interesting to try being a man but I'd definitely want the option to come back across the gender divide.

For all the reasons in Invisible Women. And currently in particular, for equal pay.

Men die up to twenty years younger than women, so no thank you. I prefer to be XX and have the better health and longer life span.

Women are stastically more likely to be killed

Hoho. This is not true in all western first world countries.
Please do some research. Men are 3x more likely to be killed (murdered) than women in the U.K.

Men might be more likely to be murdered but do they walk round alone with keys clenched in their fists, do they make sure they text their mates when they’re in from a night out?

They walk around with knives and coshes, actual weapons instead of keys. They do text mates or family. This is because when a woman is attacked, it is most often for rape and not always life threatening. Men are most often attacked to be killed. The proof is in the statistics.

I'd rather be a guy of course i would for one i wouldn't be as vulnerable walking alone at night and i would be paid more just because. Beibg on my period now i can tell you this part can fuck off too. I hate my periods.

If i could specify id like to be a tall handsome white guy then the world really is my oyster.

I hate periods too. Eves curse.

My dh has never walked around with a knife or any other weapon. It is much less likely that a man worries about where he walks , when he walks and how to defend himself, than a woman would.

Oh I wish I was a man! No periods, pregnancy or birth related injuries. No breastfeeding so I’m basically off the hook for a lot of the childcare especially at night. No disfigured body or stretch marks or low self esteem post pregnancy. No menopause or resulting bodily deterioration. I’d be allowed to age and not considered unattractive for daring to do so. I wouldn’t be the first choice to be stuck at home with DC, I can pretty much guarantee I’d be able to go to work and progress my career, and have someone else staying at home looking after my DC. No discrimination from employers because I dared to have a family and not be 100% career focused. No discrimination from others who don’t like me being in a position of authority because of my sex. No fear when walking in the dark etc. Vastly decreased chance of rape or assault. Increased body strength. Orgasm every time I have sex (and it must be amazing as a man because they’re obsessed with it). No makeup. No leg shaving. No UTIs. No bladder weakness or prolapse as I get older. What’s not to like? The longer I experience being a woman the more glad I am that my son isn’t one and will never have to deal with this shit.

It'd be interesting to try being a man but I'd definitely want the option to come back across the gender divide.

Isn't it a sex divide?

As a pp said, it's an interesting thought experiment, but it's twisting my brain in knots! If you could magically become a man in order to experience life from the 'other side' how could you even then compare it with life as a woman, because you wouldn't actually be you anymore. Surely with different chromosomes and hormones etc etc your emotional responses to things would be entirely different. You'd be trying to compare two different people.

It is much less likely that a man worries about where he walks , when he walks and how to defend himself, than a woman would.

This strikes me as unlikely.

The world is, of course, a far less violent place than it was when I was growing up but I can't think of a single man of my own age who hasn't been assaulted off the top of my head and very few of them ever bothered to report their beatings.

I'm pretty sure they are aware of their surroundings and take care to avoid certain areas just as women do if for slightly different reasons.

My dh has never walked around with a knife or any other weapon. It is much less likely that a man worries about where he walks , when he walks and how to defend himself, than a woman would.

Congratulations on marrying a privileged middle class man who has only lived in affluent, safe neighbourhoods and never had the misfortune to share it with criminal gangs.

I think I'd like to be a man, I'd definitely like to feel stronger physically, see what that's like and yeah no periods would be fantastic too

I agree Arnold.
It just baffles me that while women have it worse in general/most things, that some posters seem to have it in their heads that this means women have it worse in everything. The statistics show that men are in fact more likely to be assaulted or murdered than women.

@MIdgebabe

I'll stick with being female, thanks, but I can't help but think you're getting this bit wrong:

It is much less likely that a man worries about where he walks , when he walks and how to defend himself, than a woman would.

Men are around 3 times more likely to be violently attacked by a stranger than women are (ONS figures) and I'm really not sure men aren't scared when approaching groups of people in 'not so great' areas.

But I suppose it comes down to what type of attack we're more likely to be on the receiving end of than men, and vice versa.

Of course men have to be alert when they're out. One of my sons refused to go out after dark throughout his teenage years, until he got a job and had to. And we don't even live in a 'rough' area. I've always gone out after dark, I don't give it a second thought. I've never carried my keys in my hand either.
I'd still prefer to be a man though, simply because of how my life has turned out.

YABU OP

You OP shows your confusion and muddled thinking. You are born either male or female, you don’t have a choice over your biological sex.

Gender, however, you can dress however the hell you want but don’t delude yourself that you’ve changed sex, or that you’d be treated by others as the other sex.

I wouldn’t want to be a woman. Looks like hard work to me. Taking ages getting ready. Drying hair a nightmare, being constantly bombarded with messages to be slim and how a certain size is the be and and end all, periods (let’s face it what man would want that? I’ll tell you- none). Life is fairly simple for men on the whole. There are some disadvantages but I can’t think of many.

As a woman I never feel quite good enough, always having to be smarter, prettier, slimmer, more independent, earn more, better mum, better girlfriend... it's tiring. Men just don't give a shit about all of this, do they? They think sun shines out of their arses and we should be grateful they let us be around. I would want to be a man, also for all the reasons @LittleReindeer has mentioned.

I wouldn’t want to be a woman. Looks like hard work to me. Taking ages getting ready.

Not all women take ages to get ready, i don't but I still like fanulous tyvm

As a woman I never feel quite good enough, always having to be smarter, prettier, slimmer, more independent, earn more, better mum, better girlfriend... it's tiring. Men just don't give a shit about all of this, do they? They think sun shines out of their arses and we should be grateful they let us be around.

Trust me, men do care about these things (or the male equivalent). Men are fed unrealistic aesthetic expectations too, there is a huge amount of pressure to earn more (as a measure of success). Men do also feel the pressure of being a better parent, in fact it was exactly this that, as a new stepdad, brought me to Mumsnet in the first place (I just stuck around for the AIBU's)

I wouldn’t have liked to be a man back in history when they were expected to fight in some of the battles they faced and seen as cowards if they were scared at the prospect.

It would be interesting to be a man for a day. Personally I haven’t got any real issue with being female and I loved that I got to experience pregnancy. I think that is such an amazing thing.

Happy being female (at least, a post-feminism female in a developed country)

I’d like to experience male horniness for a day, and sex with a woman. And I’d like to be able to lose weight / gain muscle tone like a man. My DH only needs to go for a couple of runs and he’s already lost weight !! Annoying!

I’m so grateful to have experienced pregnancy and breastfeeding. And motherhood.

When I'm somewhere dangerous i do stay sharp, that's basic survival i think. More areas feel more dangerous though i guess if you don't feel able to defend yourself.

On Saturday i had to involve myself in a physical altercation between 2 people, walking past was not an option. it seemed to be an option for everyone who did walk past but that's another thread. I nearly got a beating, just like last time. Luckily, just like last time, someone came to my aid though

If i could try something out for the day it would be being 6" taller and however much heavier that would make me