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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

To think that if a neighbour takes a parcel in for you...

149 replies

Pinkbonbon · 14/12/2019 06:57

You go round and get it from them as soon as you are home? Or at least within a day?

Background:
I took in a parcel for my neighbours (flats) about a year back and a few days later I took another one in for them and over a week went by and they didn't come round for them. I went round with them a couple of times over the course of this time and they would come to the door, but not answer it. So I ended up leaving them a note (the person delivering had already done so) and it was another couple of days still till they came round for the parcels.

Anyway, 3 days ago I get a buzz at the door again - 'Very' delivery. I would have said no but I assumed it was for one of the closer neighbours and also the poor delivery women looked a bit frazzled. It's for them again. She put a note through their door to say where their parcel was. I knocked at their door last night (8ish) and again I think I heard someone but they never answered.

It's weird right? I mean I know it isn't a big deal but I often sleep days atm so if they come round during the day, they may be waking me up. Feel like just leaving the damn bag on their door handle haha. I wouldn't though obviously. Will stick a note through their door if they don't come/answer tomorrow.

But am I right in thinking that if a neighbour takes in a parcel for you, the norm is that you collect it asap?

OP posts:

MagentaRocks · 14/12/2019 07:58

I won’t take in parcels for one particular neighbour as they are the same. I know they are in but they ignore the door. Plus both me and dh work shifts so I don’t want them knocking to get the parcel at a time that doesn’t suit. They even had the cheek to put a note on their door saying to deliver parcels to us. None of the other neighbours take in their parcels now either. I will happily take them in for all my other neighbours though.

TreeTopTim · 14/12/2019 08:01

I don't usually answer the door to delivery people if I haven't ordered anything however one caught me off guard yesterday.

The parcel was in my house about 30 mins. As soon as my neighbour came home they were straight round picking it up.

OP I would put a note through their door telling them that if they don't collect by Monday you are sending it back.

Original poster

Pinkbonbon · 14/12/2019 08:01

Yeah I didn't even sign for it or anything so it's the couriers word against mine that I even have it. Sounds like tupper-wear or something.

… … Merry Christmas to me if they don't show lol.

OP posts:

TreeTopTim · 14/12/2019 08:04

@SarahNade a lot of the time the deliveries are from Couriers who are paid per parcel delivery. So if it is left with a neighbour it has been delivered.

Isleepinahedgefund · 14/12/2019 08:07

Put the parcels outside their door, take a timed photo to show that's what you did with them and then don't accept any more deliveries for them.

Because of the rise in online shopping it's just got really annoying taking in parcels. I used to work at home most of the time and various delivery people got wise to it and tried to leave all parcels for my entire block of flats with me. I stopped answering unless I was expecting something, refused anything that wasn't for me and actually prefer to use a pick up point wherever possible whether I'll be at home or not.

TheSerenDipitY · 14/12/2019 08:08

go over and knock , when they dont answer, paste a huge ass bit of paper, poster sized! over their door saying to come get the fucken parcels or you will return them to sender

IdleBet · 14/12/2019 08:09

We've got a neighbour like this, we take in her parcels but she won't knock.
I've bumped into her at the shop and said 'oh by the way we took a parcel in so just knock round'. After 3 days I bloody took it again.

GumboDrop · 14/12/2019 08:12

I've got a bloody massive parcel in my hallway for next door. It's been 2 weeks and they haven't collected it! They had a delivery note as I saw the driver write it out. We've been round a couple of times with it but no answer although I know someone has been in a few times.

nononever · 14/12/2019 08:16

I don't mind taking in parcels for my neighbours as I'm generally at home during the day, with one exception. She is the rudest person I have ever met and got fed up after taking in Amazon parcels on 6 consecutive days. In the end I told her to use an Amazon locker as I wouldn't be taking in any more.

JigsawsAreInPieces · 14/12/2019 08:19

They're probably claiming to the company they haven't received it to get a refund then they'll collect it. It happens.

Ohpleasefuckofflove · 14/12/2019 08:47

I live in apartments OP, and if we accept parcels for other neighbours they’re left in the porch on our postbox. We buzz them in, the post person leave it there, and that’s that. For my next door neighbour I’ll put it outside her door. Could you not just put them outside their door and leave a note?

daisychain01 · 14/12/2019 08:51

With so many online deliveries nowadays I would set some boundaries with NDNs who become CF and treat you like an unpaid parcel administration service.

Next time you get a parcel for them and they fail to answer their door, write a note saying you withdraw any right for them to use your address anymore. Simple as. Why should you have to deal with their shit. Let's face it if ever there was a dispute about non receipt of goods you'll get dragged into it, even though it has nothing to do with you.

Stop it in its tracks.

FlamingoAndJohn · 14/12/2019 08:57

My neighbours partner does this. He’s in but doesn’t answer the door. Weird.

No. Just a Mumsnetter. Many people here don’t answer the door to anyone unless they have a confirmed appointment.

RosaDiaz99 · 14/12/2019 08:57

All our neighbours are elderly and go to bed early, so on the odd occasion that one of them takes in a parcel for us, but dh and I are both working late and don't get home until after 7:30 pm, I generally leave collecting it until the next day - I don't want to disturb them that late in the evening.

But I definitely make sure we collect it within 36-48 hours.

Blinkyblonkyblimey · 14/12/2019 08:58

It’s so annoying! We took in parcel a couple of weeks ago for a neighbour and spent the next few days trying to catch them coming or going as they didn’t answer the door when we knocked! The neighbours on the other side actually put OUR address on things they ordered online because, and I quote; ‘They were too busy to stay in and we didn’t get out much’. Like the OP, I often feel sorry for the delivery person, but am reluctant to take things in now.

Pollywollydolly · 14/12/2019 09:00

I refuse parcels for one of my neighbours after it took two weeks for them to actually answer the door and take it.

She won't answer the door to me or acknowledge me in any way. Presumably because we have lived here a long time and she thinks I'm friends with her husband's ex wife.

SingaporeSlinky · 14/12/2019 09:02

When they’ve previously come to collect parcels, what did they say? Presumably you said “I’ve been round lots of times knocking, trying to give you the parcel”.
Either put a note through saying ‘please collect from me at number xx by Tuesday or I’ll have to return it to sender’. If they don’t, then stop accepting parcels in future.
I’ve got one neighbour who I ended up taking 5 parcels for, in the space of a few days, including a massive box. I knocked and asked them to come and help carry them as they were heavy, and they really apologised and said the driver hadn’t left any notes. I then got a Christmas card thanking me for regularly taking in parcels.
Another neighbour a few doors down never used to even thank me, so now I refuse. The drivers are fine with that, I just say “sorry, I don’t know them” and they try someone else.

Oneborneverydecade · 14/12/2019 09:05

We took in a few parcels for my new ndn before they had officially moved in. The largest was a combi oven which made an interesting feature in our lounge for almost a week. They bought us chocolates to say thank you though which makes all the difference

slartibarti · 14/12/2019 09:07

YABU to keep taking in parcels for them.
You're allowed to refuse to accept deliveries meant for other people.
Just tell the courier no, because you've had problems with that neighbour.

ChristmasSweet · 14/12/2019 09:10

I would go round with a note stating the time and a message of 'pick this up within the hour or I claim it as mine'. Obviously when they are definitely in.

If they don't come you get a free gift. Then refuse any further deliveries.

Iloveacurry · 14/12/2019 09:27

I’ve never really had a problem with taking in parcels for neighbours. If I have, they usually pick it up ASAP, and I pick up from them as soon as I’m home if they’ve taken a parcel in for me.

What I don’t understand is why don’t people get deliveries sent to their work address, if it’s allowed of course.

Craftylittlething · 14/12/2019 09:27

I only take parcels for neighbours I actually like. I used to live next door to someone I didn’t like and their was no way I’d take her parcels. Harassed or not it’s okay to say no.

lotusbell · 14/12/2019 09:29

I really don't get this as surely you want the parcel that you have ordered and paid for and it's better collecting it from two doors down than the local collection office/courier depot?? I'm lucky in that my neighbours do take in for us and we will always collect asap. I'd either start refusing deliveries or put a note through saying youre8happy to take in/sign for in their absence (or not, it would seem) but parcels must be collected within 24 hours otherwise you will leave outside their door at their own risk.
Actually, screw that - why should you take it round there and do all the lifting a carrying?!
Safer and easier all round to just start refusing I think!

Chesneyhawkes1 · 14/12/2019 09:31

I had DHL ask if I'd take a parcel for house opposite. I said of course. He then gets a set of 4 huge 4x4 tyres out of the van.

I said put them in my car boot as my porch isn't that big. 4 days later they were still in there!

People opposite has gone away I later found out, but it was annoying.

Sparklybaublefest · 14/12/2019 09:33

You are entitled to say No,
I mostly say no
and on my package delivery I do not quote the neighbours as an option.

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