Tell me your horror text Autocorrect stories please!

[Butterfly98]

Not a horror one but friend sent me a WhatsApp message earlier saying our Christmas tree is really nice as she saw it on DD's Instagram. I replied saying yours is really nice 'as well' but somehow the words 'as well' were changed to 'awful' and I didn't realise until I sent it! Was that the actual iPhone that autocorrected or WhatsApp? Anyway she has a good sense of humour and thought it was funny! Tell me your good and embarrassing autocorrects that you only noticed after you pressed 'send'!

[Montgomerystubercles]

A bit of a theme - when pregnant DH texted to see if I wanted anything from the shop and I replied a big bottle of fascism. (Gaviscon)

[rocketqueen1979]

I sent IT department a request for them to look at my vomposter (instead of computer) God knows what a vomposter is but it sounds rude!

I also sent a text asking partner what he was doing that evening and got the reply "watching the riding footspiders" he was watching a film called rise of the footsoliders!

[ScreamingValalalalahLalalalah]

Email rather than text - sent to my team at work - "Can anyone swap a shit tomorrow with John?'

Shift, obviously .

[NameChangedNoImagination]

Nothing to contribute but dying with laughter.

[QueenofallIsee]

Told a friend that I was taking the dog to the vet due to her homosexuality (hypothyroidism I think it was meant to be). Told my sister that work gets in the way of my sodomy (social life).

[Writersblock2]

I’m literally crying. The dog is looking at me like I’m about to choke to death.

[BringOnTheScience]

I used to work with a guy called Chitral. Outlook at the time default autocorrected it to Clitoral. Every Single Time.
We were in the water industry, so also had lots of emails about brothels instead of boreholes.

[FreakyPurple]

Once sent a text to my husband's cousin that I had managed to get a lovely large dick for Christmas - autocorrect from duck

[onioncrumble]

I sent a message that read 'Sophie has joined Taliban, we should ask her what it's like'to a group chat that Sophie is in. I meant Talabat which is the Qatar equivalent of Uber eats

[ClinkyMonkey]

DP was in hospital a few years ago and his sister came back from a holiday to the news and immediately texted me to find out what was wrong. He had Atrial Fibrillation and I started tapping this in. It came up as 'he has a condition called Burial ...' I started laughing at the autocorrect (was feeling a bit overwrought and was glad of a laugh) when somehow I clicked 'send'. That sent me over the edge and I was laughing hysterically while feeling a bit panicky. I desperately tried to sent another text to put my mistake right, when I got one from her saying 'OMG, is that serious?'

By that stage I had completely lost the plot and the tears were rolling down my face

[Laserbird16]

I requested a quote from a builder and signed off with a lovely X

Plus my work emails often end 'Many tanks' like a Panzer division will descend upon my coworkers

[Butterfly98]

These are bloody brilliant!! 🤣🤣 I just burst out laughing standing in a queue at Costa! Not a text but I saw a job vacancy once that read 'Fat typist required' obviously missed out the 's'!

[Pliudev]

Not quite autocorrect but spell check. I wrote an essay when studying for my degree. Last minute job, no time to proof read...discovered later that every mention of Freud had been changed to Fraud.

[CuntyMcBollocks]

My friend signed off a message to me with "love you, you daft bat" and my reply, "love you too, you even dafter bat" was changed to "love you too, you even fatter bat" Good job she has a great sense of humour!

[theicepopqueen]

I sent this message to my husband this morning: if you see a Calendar Club can you please try to get the good porn calendar, sold out online. Meant to say 'food' obvs

[IdiotInDisguise]

I sent a message that started with “Dear Rich,” it was changed to “Dear Shag”

[Confusedbeetle]

I texted my daughter who was coming for a sunday roast as I was out of fat for the roast potatoes,
" Have you got any goose or fuck fat"

[LucyAutumn]

I was telling my friends about the time my DH (boyfriend at the time) poured me a Bailey's but, not knowing how to make a Bailey's , added coke... which auto correct decided to change to come

[MidnightCircus]

These are great! 😂
My worst ever was done in words, can't even blame autocorrect. Was talking to a customer, and described something as "handcunt" rather than haircut. Luckily they found it amusing, but I could have died

[Zebrasmummy]

Email rather than text, but once sent a number of professionals involved in my daughter's education (camhs, Ed psych, Sen, headteacher etc) a message where her name has autocorrected to penis throughout. Only noticed when my partner replied that I probably ought to check things before sending them 😆. Thankfully everyone saw the funny side and my daughter only had herself to blame as it was her that had thought it would be funny to set my phone to make it suggest penis as an autocorrect option for her name!

[SmudgeButt]

Used to proof read letters a colleague wanted to send out as she was dyslexic and couldn't spot the errors. She wanted to ask someone about their time working in a warehouse but the pc autocorrected to whorehouse. Personally I was very tempted to send the letter just to see if we got a reply.

[Marellaspirit]

I was doing a piece of research into outdoor play and the early years for my degree course and Microsoft word kindly autocorrected the word "wellies" to "Willie's"

[amusedbush]

'Fat typist required'

Finally, the new job I’ve been looking for!

On our first Valentines Day together, DH and I lived in different cities so we weren’t spending it together. He texted me that morning though: ‘happy value times’

I also know someone called Lexy and a very senior colleague replied to an email (with half a dozen people copied in!) ‘thanks sexy’

[Jeeperscreepers69]

The jews omg im rolling

[Bayleaf25]

@MLMsuperfan
a sports coach of ours sent an email to the parents with the same mistake, it was about could parents please stop walking across the field changed to “could parents stop wanking” 🤣🤣🤣 how I laughed