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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Working parents of children in prep schools

115 replies

Jadefeather7 · 11/12/2019 14:21

I assume in many cases both parents work in order to be able to afford to send kids to prep schools. I imagine many will have high pressure jobs with long hours and possibly travelling. How do you manage school drop offs and pick ups? I know there are a few childminders locally that provide drop off/pick up services for state schools but haven’t seen anything for private prep schools. Do you all have after school nannies? Thanks!

OP posts:

Mintjulia · 12/12/2019 08:58

Nanny ! ROFL

imamearcat · 12/12/2019 08:58

I work PT so I've spread my 3 days over 4 so I can leave at 2.30 and pick up DD at 3.30. I normally use breakfast club and drop off at 7.30 to be at work for 8.30/9.

It's a bit of a juggling act because I have a 2yo at nursery locally and school is 20 min drive away, but we manage to make it work (with help from my mum).

AveAtqueVale · 12/12/2019 09:01

To be honest for 6-9 late finishes posing a problem 3-4 times a year,I would probably do a mixture of: *asking work to make one or two of the meetings earlier/ skypable/ excusing yourself from one somehow
*Asking other school parents - even if you don't know them well if you explain the situ on the class WhatsApp and offer to reciprocate with weekend playdates/ a day when you have AL during the holidays you may get a few offers.
*Beg any grandparents/ family members to do at least one pickup if local, invite them to stay for a few days (and do a pickup or two) if not.
*Finding a reliable babysitter through something like childcare.co.uk who can pick them up, take them home and bung them some tea until you get back.

We have a constant juggle as usually our childcare works ok, but sometimes we are both on late shifts at the same time

AveAtqueVale · 12/12/2019 09:02

Sorry posted too soon-. just meant to say as they're only occasional it's not worth us having a nanny (and we couldn't really afford it), so tend to do a mixture of the above.

Stickybeaksid · 12/12/2019 09:09

We have breakfast club and after school club but I work from home two days so I can pick him straight after school finishes and he is happy to lurk around while I finish work. Dh works one day a week from home. We both work in professional roles but we are luck our firms are all about flexible working. I would tackle the late meetings at work. Meetings in the evening are rarely productive anyway . Why not move them by an hour or to the mornings? Sometimes I think teams at work just do things because that’s they way it’s always done and everyone blindly goes along with it.

Sannapaws · 12/12/2019 09:11

The people I know with kids in private schools have nannies and au pairs and usually one parent is also non-working.

laudete · 12/12/2019 09:18

Another thing worth factoring in is whether your chosen school offers flexi-boarding. :) It's a useful and popular option for some parents who only need the occasional ad-hoc night. If you only work late a handful of nights per year, it could make all the difference to your family.

Boarding usually starts from age 8 minimum. However, I know of one family who had all their kids (including one under 8) flexi-board on a one-off one-night occasion to cover the mom giving birth. It was by special arrangement as I believe they had no alternative for that night. A good school will always rally around to help their families if they can.

Tablepicture · 12/12/2019 09:18

The people I know with kids in private schools have nannies and au pairs and usually one parent is also non-working.

I understand having a nanny/au pair. And I understand one of the couple becoming a SAHP. But why both at once?

Is it just a case of they can afford it and it makes life easier so they just do it?

laIa3 · 12/12/2019 14:10

In my experience either one parent is stay at home or nanny/au pair. It's a firm 5pm finish so impossible unless either of the parents are on flexible working hours.

jacks11 · 12/12/2019 14:36

Our prep provides wrap around care from 7:30am until 6pm. So we work around that and occasionally my mum or friends with children at same school will collect if an unexpected situation arises. I don’t have (or need) a nanny.

LynnMa2 · 12/12/2019 15:18

I'm a SAHM and my husband works from home occasionally. Our school also offers before & after school care but only 8-5 or so. My 3 kids stay for clubs 3 days a week and are picked up at the bell by one of us on Mondays & Fridays. I'd say 50% of the kids in the junior years have SAHMs or WFH moms and then there are some Nannies and Au Pairs. Not sure about the upper years.

PooWillyBumBum · 12/12/2019 15:43

Most other parents had a SAHP or a nanny. I dropped my child at the boarding house for breakfast club under the cover of night, then picked her up after aftercare. Luckily aftercare was free and breakfast club much cheaper than a childminder. Did make for a very long day though :(

myself2020 · 12/12/2019 16:09

Very few nannies at my son’s prep - i know about 3 families that have a nanny.
usually one parent does drop off, the other pick up. breakfast club also starts at 7:30. we also have s childminder for holidays

myself2020 · 12/12/2019 16:10

hardly any sahp at ours as well - most families have both parents working full time

myself2020 · 12/12/2019 16:12

@Sannapaws you snow a very a typical population of prep parents

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