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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's odd when elderly parents vote for things that adversely affect their children and grandchildren?

200 replies

malificent7 · 10/12/2019 07:53

Take Brexit and people who lost their jobs as a result...just why?
And my dad. I tried explaining that the Tories cut the NHS bursary so now i will be 60, 000 in debt when i graduate and he just sai " so what?" and " labour brought in the student loan." Yes dad...and without a student loan i wouldn't be able to retrain at all and wpuld be sruck in a minimum wage, zeri hour vontract job.
It's like people know who they want to vote for and won't listen to others...even though i listen to his concerns on immigration( with his lovely immigrant dp sitting beside him.) Cognative dissonance at its finest!

OP posts:
Paintedmaypole · 11/12/2019 09:14

I think about my family's future but I think it is important to think more broadly too. If they were in a position of priviledge I would not want to be motivated by greed for them to have more while other people went without. Broad concerns like the environment, education and health will affect all the upcoming generation.

andpancakesforbreakfast · 11/12/2019 09:19

I dont understand why anyone would not vote to benefit their family tbh...i certainly vote for dds best interests...why wouldn't i?

people do... of course that's exactly what they do.

TheSandman · 11/12/2019 09:26

My elderly parents don't agree with the closer political Union in the EU. They also say they remember life before we joined the Common Market and we'll be alright

You mean when the Commonwealth countries still rolled over and let the 'mother country' shaft them? I think a lot of them have got a lot more savvy to the post Imperial world in the last 40 years. They owe us nothing.
All that 'influence' we used to have over great swathes of the world has gone. We've been out-bid by the Chinese, the Koreans, the Americans.... All we do now is launder their money and sell them weapons. The sooner we grow up to the reality that Britain's 'Glory Days' are over and were are just a middle-ranking European state the better.

BrexitMakeItStop · 11/12/2019 09:29

They think they know best.

They mis-remember the past and long for the 'good old days'.

They've been radicalised by the drip drip poison of the tabloids.

They think they've lived through worse.

They think there are too many people in the country.

Skinnychip · 11/12/2019 09:34

I feel aggrieved that the vote was even given to the public in the first place since it is clear that no one knew if /how/why/when it would take effect. It's taken senior politicians, lawyers, civil servants, economists a shit ton of money and 3.5 years to get where we are now.....which is not a whole lot clearer than where we were in June 2016!!

A4Document · 11/12/2019 09:38

People have different views on how the world can be made a better place. Sensible, intelligent, caring people do have various different perspectives on the world. Political fundamentalism is replacing religious fundamentalism and is just as blinkered and dangerous. It should not be heresy to vote for XYZ party or Brexit viewpoint. The ageism towards older voters is unwarranted. If politics is only about financial matters and people with the most years ahead of them, you might as well have an upper age limit of 1.

MaryPeary · 11/12/2019 09:39

Many people have different views about what will be in the interests of young people. There isn't a monopoly on ways to try to help. Just like many people on benefits vote Tory because they think a strong economy is the best way to lift people out of poverty. It's just not as simple as "poor = Labour, well off = Tory".
Most politicians probably do genuinely want to help as many people as possible. They just have different views about the most effective way to do it.

A4Document · 11/12/2019 09:45

They think they know best
And so do some young people who sneer at the wisdom of age

They mis-remember the past and long for the 'good old days'.
They remember the past and how no-one realised the aim of the Common Market was to create a superstate by stealth.

They've been radicalised by the drip drip poison of the tabloids.
They've read widely and made up their own minds.

They think they've lived through worse.
They aren't afraid of putting this country's independence above money, because they have already lived through worse and have courage and stamina.

They think there are too many people in the country.
They recognise that the sustainable population of this country is around a fifth of its actual population.

MaryPeary · 11/12/2019 09:45

@Insideimsprinting Grow up vote for who you want and let them vote for who they want it's a democracy and difference of opinion is just part of life.

Exactly. You get your own vote. You don't get to tell other people how to cast theirs, or attempt to emotionally blackmail them into voting the way you think is best.

Stooshie8 · 11/12/2019 09:55

Lots of changes need to be made over the next decades. Jobs will be lost thanks to AI, tCO2 levels must be reduced, that brings big changes to lifestyle, travel hugely reduced, we probably cannot remain a capitalist economy, though who knows what it will change to. Easier to make these changes on our own without requiring votes of ,is it 27, other countries be able to start doing anything.

KidLorneRoll · 11/12/2019 10:26

Because they don't give a fuck.

Insideimsprinting · 11/12/2019 11:23

Malificent7
They may well vote in their families best interests but what they view that to be may be very different to what you think.

BertrandRussell · 11/12/2019 11:27

For the last 10 or so years of her long life, my mother consulted the oldest but not able to vote grandchild about her vote, and if she could in conscience do do she voted according to their advice.

wowfudge · 11/12/2019 12:05

@TheSandman - no, they don't have those views, they mean economically we'll be alright outside the EU. Which remains to be seen.

Oldraver · 11/12/2019 13:26

My Mum was a bit shocked that ' If all the foreigners' go back then OH's employers would probably move production abroad

Paintedmaypole · 11/12/2019 13:36

I do accept that more older people voted for Brexit but when writing "they" please remember that 36% voted remain.

Louisianna16 · 11/12/2019 14:32

All this talk of elderly ppl voting Brexit, reminds me of a little mentioned fact re the referendum, (and , sadlywe can prob guess why no one wants to talk about it) and that is:

" Among the other age groups, voters aged 24 to 49 narrowly opted for Remain (54%) over leave (46%) "

yougov.co.uk/topics/politics/articles-reports/2016/06/27/how-britain-voted

CharlottesPleb · 11/12/2019 17:33

"I dont understand why anyone would not vote to benefit their family tbh...i certainly vote for dds best interests...why wouldn't i?"

Best interests is a value judgment. Plenty of people have sacrificed literally everything and left their families bereaved and destitute as the price of eg freedom, independence and the right to vote.

Nanny0gg · 12/12/2019 00:45

BTW, I meant to ask

Define 'elderly'.

JustACog · 12/12/2019 03:19

Nostalgia, Rose tinted glasses and a longing for a return to a time they see as better.

A time of rationing and latterly strikes and 3 day weeks.

WatchingTheMoon · 12/12/2019 03:27

Most people vote in their own interests, not their children's.

A lot of people also can't get their head around times changing. I noticed this in myself too at some point (wondering why teenagers don't 'just get a job' as I did, not really realising that it's far more difficult than when I was young.)

My mother can't understand why we don't own a house despite both having decent jobs. She thinks we are feckless and squander all of our money on avocado toast and phone contracts.

WatchingTheMoon · 12/12/2019 03:35

Also, there are times when I have to vote against my own interests and that is really hard.

Husband is a non-EU citizen, we're planning to move back to the UK and I would say Brexit could end up being beneficial for us since it could mean that immigration laws for non-EU citizens are relaxed (of course, no guarantee). I am totally against Brexit but of course it's hard to vote wondering if you are shafting yourself.

Inheritance tax too - I'm all for it, but it's going to be an issue for me in the next decade or so, and a bit shit to vote for something that is going to end up resulting in less money for me.

ethelfleda · 12/12/2019 07:47

and a bit shit to vote for something that is going to end up resulting in less money for me

And here lies the problem...

ssd · 12/12/2019 10:21

Less money for me.....

It's the I'm alright Jack attitude that's got us the government we have. And will probably get us the next one.

Still, as long as people like watchingthemoon don't mind shafting people who don't have spare money, that's fine then.

WatchingTheMoon · 12/12/2019 10:36

"It's the I'm alright Jack attitude that's got us the government we have. And will probably get us the next one.

Still, as long as people like watchingthemoon don't mind shafting people who don't have spare money, that's fine then."

Where did I say I would vote in a way that shafts other people? Bit of a fucking leap, isn't it? I would never vote Conservative in a month of Sundays, I was simply explaining why some people might vote that way.

An "I'm alright Jack" attitude? Fucking hilarious, seriously.

This is why the left never gets anywhere. Always so quick to jump on their own.

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