About cutting grapes

[user1471433387]

We have a 2.5 year old and the other day I noticed DH was cutting grapes widthways for her. I said that you’re meant to cut them lengthways in order for them not to be a choking hazard. I notice today he’s put some grapes out for our daughter and again they’re cut widthways not lengthways. I asked him in future to please cut them lengthways but he’s refusing!

WIBU? Am I being over the top?

I think quarter ways is probably best but there’s no way he’d agree to that.

I cut grapes in 4, both for my parents and kids! So I definitely understand your pov! I don't have any advice, apart from show him some articles. But I have to ask why he's so uncaring and is he like this usually? I can't see how he's only be uncaring where grapes are involved! Is it a general trait of his?

Don't buy grapes.

I didn't spit if this link from the Child Accident Prevention Trust was already posted but the advice is to chop grapes lengthways and ideally in quarters. HTH.

www.capt.org.uk/news/why-are-grapes-so-dangerous

Spot not spit 😂

You have to watch with travel snacks.
I did hear of one little girl who choked while strapped up in her car seat , Mum driving .

The circumference of a grape is almost the exact same size as a child's airway. Don't take the risk, just quarter them.

I'm more concerned at his age tbh as I've seen how kids arse around when eating snacks.

Mine choked on a grape when he was 7. Sitting on the sofa, watching TV, and he laughed.

We were incredibly lucky. He’d given it a slight bite so it didn’t form a perfect seal on his airway and a tiny bit of air was able to get through, otherwise he would almost certainly have died before the paramedics arrived.

I’ve promised him I’ll cut up his grapes until he’s 40.

Cutting them width ways probably worse than not cutting them at all!

I don't know if it's got lost among all the other messages so here it is again op, in case you missed it.

go.mumsnet.com/?xs=1&id=470X1554755&url=<iframe src="https://www.youtube-nocookie.com/embed/GRsNHn8Mekg" frameborder="0" allow="accelerometer; autoplay; clipboard-write; encrypted-media; gyroscope; picture-in-picture" allowfullscreen>

A doctor clearly explaining why you need to cut grapes length ways and not width ways.

He says there’s a potential risk in driving the car but I still do that

Which you mitigate by using a car seat.

Ask him why he's cutting the grapes in the first place? If it's to reduce the choking risk then presumably he understand that there is a risk. Does he?

Every time he buys grapes throw them in the bin until he is prepared to behave in a more responsible manner.

LetTheEat,

Some basic maths for you.

There are 12 deaths a year from choking (in total) in children 0-5. Thus the population size is 3.4mio and the number who choke is 12, so one in about 250,000. However, grape choking is only the 3rd commonest cause (after sweets and sausages), so say 2 out of the 12 are grapes, we are back to my 1 in a million chance.

Yes, ideally we should go back to pre cutting grape stats if we really want to get at the number.

OTOH, I agree with the poster who said if you really want to avoid the risk, avoid grapes. They are not very nutritious and far too sweet.

Mine does the same- cuts them widthways only because he knows better. He also doesn't brush baby's teeth when it's his turn to get her ready for bed, because baby doesn't like her teeth being brushed so she'd be crying at him! Total arseholes

www.resus.org.uk/apps/lifesaver/

I've not RTFT but I agree with what @SexlessBoulderBelly said early on:

if my DP put his ego before our DD safety that would be a huge deal breaker

LOOK AT THE LIFESAVER VIDEO.

My kids are 8 and 9 and I still cut their grapes in 2 lengthways. I still cut their sausages too.

NK1cf53 Is there a reason why your children cant cut their own sausages ?

All these people saying grapes are the 3rd common choking risk blah blah blah, yeah, because people have been taught the risks of not cutting grapes lengthways, and are now finding out the hard way that also works for cutting hot dogs/sausages/cocktail sausages, and sweets!

I don't think reading on a mumsnet thread about sausages and sweets as the top two choking risks is "finding out the hard way". I would imagine switching off your child's life support is finding out the hard way.

It gets me that nurseries serve sausages to toddlers, I've seen ours cut them up but not lengthways. That's why my son has a packed lunch. Annoyingly the nursery don't stop children bringing in their own whole grapes for snacks or lunch as it's the "parents choice". My son once came back with 3 whole grapes in his lunchbox from his friend, when I went mad the nursery acted like I was insane for trying to control the contents of others lunchboxes.

I'm a trauma HCP, my dc are 11, 8, and 6. I still cut grapes, sausages and cherry tomatoes for the youngest two. I cut sausages into quarters rather than discs.

Grapes are the perfect size and shape to block the airway, they are very difficult to remove.

I would ask him if he was pead ALS trained and where does he keep his Laryngoscope, Magill forceps and suction.

Witnessing a child chokeing is a horrific sight in a well stocked resus with a well trained team. Imagine that in your own kitchen, with an ambulance response time of 8 minutes for a red call on a good day. The risk may be small but why take it if you don't have to.

Thanks for all the responses.

We haven’t discussed it again with each other. But I can still feel the argument in the air if you know what I mean.

He prepared her nursery bag yesterday and I checked if he had given her grapes. He had and they were cut up in quarters!

He is a very caring and devoted dad. Far more involved than most other dads I know.

He thinks I’m over cautious. He wanted to give our children solids before 6 months and give our 11 month old cow milk as a drink.

This is from the Child Accident Prevention Trust.

www.capt.org.uk/news/why-are-grapes-so-dangerous

This is from the Royal College of Paediatrics and Child Health - a subsection of the British Paediatric Association. It mentions chopping into quarters and contains three horrifying case studies. If they're worried about it, your DH certainly should be.

adc.bmj.com/content/102/5/473

I can't believe your DH would be so irresponsible and demand statistics when it makes complete sense that a grape, a fruit that is malleable and squishy, is something that will easily block your childs larynx. The fact that it can mould to the shape of your child's throat means it is extremely difficult to remove and is the main reason why 2 of those children in that study above had to have emergency larygeal surgery to remove the object.

Your DH is an ignorant twat.

Cross post, didnt see the update OP!

Good to see they're in quarters.

It would be nice if he could actually trust you. You know...the mother of his child

Life is too short to cut up grapes. Just don't give them to anyone who can't eat them safely.