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AIBU?

How bad is This number of days off?

154 replies

attendance121 · 03/12/2019 07:45

9 days since September 1, what percentage does that work out as?

OP posts:

Report

adaline · 03/12/2019 08:26

We once had an employee who claimed to be sick - they shot themselves in the foot when they posted pictures of themselves on a weekend away at a safari park

As we had clear evidence of her lying, she was disciplined and the sick pay was deducted from her next pay check for lying to her employers. If she'd asked for the time off as unpaid or annual leave in the first place we'd have obliged - but she didn't want to waste her holiday allowance!

Lying to your employer generally always backfires sooner or later.

londonrach · 03/12/2019 08:26

It seems alot in a short time but its a time when people are ill...what the leave been like rest of the year eg summer. Unless hugh medical problem eg broken leg, heart attack you need a meeting at work for that amount of time off in short time

attendance121 · 03/12/2019 08:27

I haven’t lied to my employer. I said it was DC sick in October when I had 4 days with her.

Then I had 3 days myself.

Now DC is sick again! This is the part I’m not sure what to do about!

OP posts:

orangeteal · 03/12/2019 08:28

It's a lot. How many days has your DH taken off in the same time frame?

lifeisgoodagain · 03/12/2019 08:28

A lot! You need a plan b for child sickness, first day is fine but by second day I would expect parents to sort something out unless the child is critically ill of course. I've been fortunate that for the last 8 years I've been able to flex my hours, work from home, take kids in etc but I have taken no sick in that time l, nor for me - I have a poster for my office door forewarning people to enter at their own risk if I get sick, or I work at home (no one else does my job so no point putting it off, no idea what would happen if I got properly I'll)

attendance121 · 03/12/2019 08:29

Bloody hell I wish it was a safari park!

Dh was off yesterday and today but child isn’t any better.

OP posts:

attendance121 · 03/12/2019 08:30

what sort of plan B? I mean that genuinely by the way!

OP posts:

Nicknacky · 03/12/2019 08:30

So how many days has your H taken off? One?

GrannyBags · 03/12/2019 08:31

So what happens next week when you genuinely are ill and have to take more time off? I think you would have been better off explaining the situation to your employer in the first place. Most places will try to help if they can - I’ve worked with teachers who were married to teachers and so poorly children was always an issue. They might be able to change your hours, give you things to do at home, swop with another person etc. Telling lies to your employer is never a good place to start.

attendance121 · 03/12/2019 08:31

4

OP posts:

mclover · 03/12/2019 08:32

Look at the Bedford scale - that's what most people use to calculate reasonable sickness

Atalune · 03/12/2019 08:33

Friend
Family members

Plan b...

Working in a school is particularly bad to be sick. It can’t be helped but if you’ve had 9 days off and your partner has had one.... well I think that’s very poor!

Perhaps working in a school isn’t for you?

GrapefruitGin · 03/12/2019 08:33

It’s an awful lot of sickness. Does you child have a medical condition or is it general bugs? Not being rude, I’m genuinely questioning?

attendance121 · 03/12/2019 08:33

granny we have had a real run of bad luck with illness, including a fall down the stairs and bump on head so not illness exactly but more circumstances.

Believe me we do everything we can, hand washing, paid for private chicken pox vaccines to avoid that, but when they do get ill what can you do?

If I tell the truth I lose pay. If I lose pay we can’t pay essential bills. I genuinely feel a bit stuck. I don’t have a sympathetic employer.

OP posts:

Dontdisturbmenow · 03/12/2019 08:33

You are being very naive. Taking sick days when you are not sick is not just lying it is fraud because you are ultimately getting money you are not entitled to. It is stealing even if it doesn't feel like it to you.

It's a lot of sickness in the family if your oh has also taken days off. Are they really do poorly they can't attend childcare/school with some Calpol.

Your choice is you want to lie so you can get the money but you are certainly playing with fire either way.

attendance121 · 03/12/2019 08:34

It’s two children grapefruit so that doesn’t help. One had a hospital stay as well.

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GrapefruitGin · 03/12/2019 08:34

Ah sorry cross post

adaline · 03/12/2019 08:34

If your DC is sick then that's what you need to say. Explain that DH has taken x amount of time off already but that DC is no better and it's now your turn.

Don't go down the road of lying to your employer. If you end up genuinely unwell later in the year then this could backfire on you massively as you may end up being disciplined for it.

amusedbush · 03/12/2019 08:35

That's a lot of time off. You'd be asked for a meeting over that in my work.

Be thankful you don't work for Royal Mail. DH could be off for two weeks with the flu and that would be classed as one absence. However, if he was off for two days, went back to work then took another day because he wasn't quite 100%, that's two instances of absence and would trigger a meeting

Teachermaths · 03/12/2019 08:35

You really need a plan b. Have you got any friends you could pay to have dc?

Does a bump on the head really warrant 8 days off? (assuming dh had 4 days too)

Piggywaspushed · 03/12/2019 08:38

I don't understand why you keep saying you lose pay!
As a teacher, you will not lose pay for tending to sick children. You will cause annoyance and might be asked if you can sort something else - but I have never heard of anyone being docked pay for this.

I think you don't understand statutory pay and conditions...

attendance121 · 03/12/2019 08:39

No teacher, like I say I would love to know what plan B is.

Bump on the head wasn’t 8 days, it was 2 (48 hours)

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attendance121 · 03/12/2019 08:39

No piggy we don’t honestly! We get 3 days paid leave which obviously I’ve gone over already!

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GrannyBags · 03/12/2019 08:40

There must be other people in a similar position at your work - what do they do? Could they offer some advice?

adaline · 03/12/2019 08:40

@amusedbush it's like that in most work places. Absence is often by number of occasions not the total time off - I get why they do it but it's so frustrating!

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