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AIBU to sleep from 3am to 12 midday?

115 replies

Scarscar · 27/11/2019 14:47

My natural sleep pattern falls from 3am to 12 midday and it's been this way for 25 years since I was a teen.
I've done all the things over the years to try and change it light box, various sleeping tablets, no screens, orange sleep glasses, not eating/drinking late, aromatherapy oils, hypnotherapy, meditation etc.
I'd like to sleep normal hours but I can't seem to find a way to change. I am at a point where I feel like just saying enough of trying to change it and just accept that those are my sleeping hours and I shall work my life around what my body seems to need. AIBU?

OP posts:

Am I being unreasonable?

254 votes. Final results.

You are being unreasonable
You are NOT being unreasonable
AlexaShutUp · 27/11/2019 14:50

Hard to say whether you're being unreasonable or not. If you live alone and can work around it, then do as you please. If you have a family, then you would need to consider the potential impact on them.

QuestionableMouse · 27/11/2019 14:54

Do you need to change it?

I tend to sleep best from 1-2am until 10ish so feel your pain! It makes no real difference to me though and on the days I need to be up earlier I manage.

Have you had your vit D levels checked?

User342109097569098 · 27/11/2019 14:54

How do you fit your life around those hours? Work ect?

MyFamilyAndOtherAnimals1 · 27/11/2019 15:15

If it doesn't affect your life and you enjoy doing that, then don't change it.

However, if you need to change it - I'd suggest forcing yourself to get up and out of bed at 7am for a week and don't take any naps during the day.

You'll soon end up tired enough that you'll fall asleep earlier than 3am.

coconuttelegraph · 27/11/2019 15:18

Of course you can oganise your life that way if it's possible for you and your family if you have one. Why do you need to ask?

Yarboosucks · 27/11/2019 15:18

Me too....

It really bothers me and I really bothered by it now. If anyone has beaten this, I would love to know how!

Drabarni · 27/11/2019 15:21

Me too.

These are my hours that work best for me. If you aren't bothering anyone else, why change it.
I often get comments if I let something slip in conversation, but I don't care.

Frownette · 27/11/2019 15:21

Another one who wondered how that fitted around other commitments. OP can you elaborate?

Abouttimemum · 27/11/2019 15:24

Job? Family?

BrieAndChilli · 27/11/2019 15:26

i'm similar my natural pattern seems to be 1-2am until 9-10am. unfortunately that doesnt work with the rest of the world and family life.

Imabitofanexpertatpeppa · 27/11/2019 15:27

As long as you have a job that fits with it and no children that rely on you then fine. Do as you please?

IWorkAtTheCheesecakeFactory · 27/11/2019 15:28

Depends on what your set up is. Presumably you have no kids? Do you work? Or plan to at some point?

SunshineAngel · 27/11/2019 15:29

I do the same and it works for me. I WFH and have clients in different countries so my working hours are quite a bit later than normal office hours, so by the time I've worked, had dinner and chilled out, it's often 3am, then I'll stay in bed until 10.30-11.00 in the morning and start my day again.

It's not a problem unless it's a problem for you. My DSS is 16 and his dad sees him before he goes to college, then I'm around in the evenings to make dinner etc. But it would be an issue if you had smaller children.

minipie · 27/11/2019 15:29

I’ve read about this - it’s called delayed sleep phase disorder or something similar. Treated using bright light at very specific times I believe - but you may have tried this. Melatonin might also help.

If you’ve tried everything and it hasn’t worked then YANBU to stop trying.

badbananabad · 27/11/2019 15:32

What is your job OP?

Of course YANBU if it doesn't affect your daily life, only you can really answer that.

Is it causing problems with day-to-day routines/people in your life?

Elieza · 27/11/2019 15:34

As long as you can get a job on back shift or work online with a company who operates from abroad it’s fine. Why should it not be? It’s your body and your life. Just as long as you can make enough money to pay the bills.

rubydoobydoo · 27/11/2019 15:40

Same here and I just go with it wherever I can and feel better and more energised when I do.

I do shift work and most of my shifts fit around my natural pattern - my early shifts start at 9am but I only have two of those every 10 days and I take melatonin the night before.

I'm off sick from work at the moment and have fallen straight back into going to bed at 3am.

AloeVeraLynn · 27/11/2019 15:43

If your work and social life isn't suffering then it's not really an issue. Not doable with kids though.

ArseholesOnToast · 27/11/2019 15:44

My natural sleep pattern is 2am to about 9am - going to bed at midnight is an early night for me.

When I've had jobs where I could come in at 10am that was fine. I changed jobs where I started at 7am and had to get up at 5.20am at the latest. I just couldn't get to sleep earlier than about 1am even if I was so tired.

Going to work each day on about 4 hours sleep was terrible. It really negatively impacted on me but even if I went to bed by 10pm I just couldn't sleep. I have since changed jobs where there's no really early starts and some flexibility which is much better for me.

I am one of life's night owls and I've stopped trying to fight it. I think night owls are seen as lazy sleeping the morning away and natural larks are favoured somewhat as it's deemed desirable to be up early.

OP I don't see anything wrong with your sleeep pattern as long as it's not negatively impacting on DC.

Caspianberg · 27/11/2019 15:47

For me it wouldn't leave enough hours in the day to fit in day to day stuff that is on a 9-5 time scale, evening with being self-employed.

Have you tried the light treatment mentioned above? For me an ideal time would be 12-8am.

ColdTattyWaitingForSummer · 27/11/2019 15:54

I do sympathise as my body would choose to fall asleep at 1-2am and sleep until 10-11am. I also suffer from chronic fatigue, and poor quality sleep.
As above, it really depends who, other than you, your sleep pattern is affecting.

userxx · 27/11/2019 16:01

What are your working hours?

fallfallfall · 27/11/2019 16:12

If shift workers can sleep train so can you.
What do you “do” between 12-3? How much exercise and healthy eating do you do?

Josette77 · 27/11/2019 16:18

Do you have kids? Working hours? That is actually a pretty long sleep for 9 hours.

I am a night owl and morning lark. I'm basically not much of a sleeper. But I am up everyday by 6 regardless. If my sleep becomes really minimal I make sure to exercise more and no technology after 9 am. When I can't sleep I read or clean. I don't sit watching tv. A warm bath helps too. I also have sleeping pills I take if I need too. But I will only take them at 9 pm so I'm not sleeping too much or too late.

BarbedBloom · 27/11/2019 16:18

I am exactly the same. I can force myself into normal hours but always feel tired. In holidays when I switch I feel so much more energised and happy. If I didn't have to work I would go with that pattern.

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