To take my toddler to work...?

[Allthebiscuits]

DS developed a temperature at nursery. My DH left work to pick him up. Nursery policy means he has to be kept off for 48 hours. Fair enough. I thought it would be considerate to let work know asap that I would need to look after my DS on the second day as DH took the first day to look after him. However work claim this isn't an unforeseen illness and are insisting that I apply for dependency leave (which would be granted but possibly without pay). AIBU to take my toddler in to work...? He's not 100% but also not horribly ill.

Its a difficult situation and I feel for you but your school is unlikely to allow you to do this, they will probably not be insured. Also, imagine if you were dealing with an issue with your child and were unable to attend to a pupil who became injured as a result of you tending to your own child...wont end well .
This is such a difficult situation for you, I do completely sympathise, I had the same problem when my kids were small.

I used to work in a small office where one of the other member used to bring her child in if they were sick or school was closed, 5yo and it was a nightmare to be honest, child was lovely but obviously mum was working so child bored and disruptive. V annoying as happened a lot, boss wasn't concerned as he had his own office, rest of us open plan.

Find a nursery that doesn't have such ridiculous rules. I've never known a nursery day a temperature means they have to be off 48 hours (or even 24 hours as was noted in a similar thread)

They are supposed to follow NHS guidance. If they don't, they are looking to have great swathes of time their nursery is half empty.

Are you for real? You can't just take your child to work with you. Especially as others have said it's a school! If it's not ok to take him to nursery for 48 hours at the risk of him passing something on to other kids then why do you think it's acceptable to potentially pass an illness on to other kids where you work? You are without a doubt being ridiculous and unreasonable.

Wow think everyone needs to calm down!! The OP is obviously in a tricky situation and is doing her best to try and fix it and was just asking for opinions.
I've noticed a few times the teachers children are in our school for the day I realise why now!
Do nursery really have a policy where they have a high temp they can't go back for 48 hours?! Shocking...... great for them though isn't it, the parents still have to pay and if a few have got a temp they can probably send home one of their zero hour contract staff home. I'd change nursery OP easier said than done I know but children gets high temps all the time you'll end up in this situation again

Eg refusing to take children with hand foot & mouth or conjunctivitis
Of course they refuse to take children with highly contagious illnesses @NoIDontWatchLoveIsland 🙄
Not to mention the fact hand foot and mouth makes children miserable - childcare would be a very inappropriate setting for them in this instance

What did you do @Allthebiscuits ?

Actually ThatsNotMyMeercat the NHS guidelines suggest that parents only keep children off school/nursery whilst they are feeling unwell and not until the blisters have gone. Things like hand, foot and mouth are most contagious before any symptoms appear, so keeping them off is pretty pointless.

I took the hit

Schools are the worst. My friend took her ill child into work because they were pressuring her to come in knowing she had no childcare options.

Actually, @stilltiredinthemorning, the NHS guidelines state You're infectious from a few days before you have any symptoms, but you're most likely to give it to others in the first 5 days after symptoms
Common sense suggests that of course a nursery would try to limit the spread of any infectious illness by any means possible. And perhaps nurseries would embrace relaxed policies more if parents could be trusted not to drop off Calpol’ed, very ill children in the hope that they’ll get away with it (the amount of people here that need to ask whether it’s ok to expose clearly contagious children with chicken pox to all and sundry is evidence enough of the utter selfishness of some people)

‘How do people do this’. Uhh...they take it into consideration when planning to have unprotected sex, it’s not top secret that kids are sick all the time and that they will need huge amounts of childcare, whether that’s from paid childcare, loss of salary, or relatives providing it, in the many times of illness plus all the school holidays. It’s not acceptable to bring a contagious person into a space that they will infect other people, obviously.

Yabvu
I own my own performing arts school and from a mothers POV I wouldn’t take my sick dd into the school I’d find childcare or take the hit, that’s what comes with having kids.
From an employers POV I would not allow you to bring your child in under any circumstances unless there to attend class, I especially wouldn’t allow them in my school when their nursery won’t let them attend because of suspected illness. I don’t want parent complaints because you had no childcare and this will be your schools stance aswell, on top of that I pay you to work you will 100% not get as much work done if you have your child eapically a toddler with you, it’s just not possible no matter how much you say it is.

*espically

I’m a cm and the 48 hour rule is there to protect the other children but also the childminder. Unless you had your child’s one loose stool sample tested, how can you categorically say for sure that it was down to food allergies only?
If the cm gets the bug and closes for at least 48 hours you’d be having to take even more time off.
Most CM’s are a lot more flexible than nurseries and don’t make children stay off for 48 hours with a temp.

A nursery that insists on 48 hours after a child has a temperature? That's completely unreasonable - children get temperatures all the time, often when they aren't ill but are just teething.

Doesn't help you now but I'd look for another nursery that has a far more practical approach to childcare.

Unfortunately this one of the annoying realities of parenting! You will need to take the unpaid dependents leave or find another child care option for two days.

It isn't reasonable to take a sick child into your work environment, even if they are not 'that' sick. Also, as a mum of a toddler, I know how distracting a toddler would be at work, even if they are generally well behaved! You won't be very productive if your child is there, so it would be unfair to your employer to take your child into work and expect them to be fine about it. Frustrating I know, but you are not alone! All parents of young parents find themselves in this boat at some point!

I feel for you having no ‘cover’ when nursary won’t take him and he is not sufficiently unwell to justify sickness days. I think people with relatives locally or indulgent neighbours have no idea how hard and expensive it is not having any emergency option. I also have no family around who might step up and help out. I found the answer is getting to know some trustworthy local baby sitters. Uni age and 6th form are in classes at funny hours, they are often around in the day. It’s a faff texting round but usually someone is free, I pay £10 per hour and the children are usually pleased to see them as they regard them as fun company. And the students are usually content to watch films with the kids & play games so it’s not hard work. I only tend to ask them to do half a day at a time and husband and I cover the other half day and catch up with work in the evening but it does depend on the nature of your work. x

How rude. probably not the best thing to do. Why are people so unkind when others asking for an opinion / help

Mine have been at work for both of us several times, including some meetings in central London. a school is different though i guess

@BillHadersNewWife what about people who have moved away from family. Who do you expect to look after the kids??

Havr you had dc vaccinated against chicken pox? If not pay for it now.

i have taken my toddler into work due to no childcare a couple of times but (a) my office is very relaxed and my job is just me and a computer and and (b) he wasn't ill. assuming you are some sort of student facing position i don't see how that would work?

And yes how do people work! my job is very, very exceptional but i've still got a dick of a manager who would rather have a FT child free person in my job and i've still had to pull all sorts of nonsense to cover childcare, particularly as DP works away 2/3 of the year.

Of course you can't.
You go to work to work.
You can't work if you have to mind a child.
Part and parcel of parenting.

Obviously don’t take a sick child into school! Under the circumstances I’d be tempted to call in sick this time. My old boss was a twat about letting me take time off when my DC were sick too so I sympathize... I ended up asking her what exactly she would do in my situation and that shut her up pretty quickly!