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AIBU?

The dentist struck off my 4 year old son

132 replies

Cornishcharm · 19/11/2019 17:33

Ok so, in October I had to rearrange my sons dentist appointment because it was his first parents evening. I gave a weeks notice and rearranged for November.

We were about to leave for my sons appointment and he wants to go for a poo. So I called the dentist and explained that we were going to be late (15 minutes max). I asked if he could still be seen i.e. let other patients go first or if that wasn't possible could I rearrange it.

Now I hate cancelling like that and the only other time I have had the cancel his appointment previously was when he had D&V and I wasn't able to give 24 hours notice.

The receptionist told me that I couldn't bring him as he wouldn't be seen and that he had been struck off.

We have never received and formal notice that he could be struck off.

I have submitted a formal complaint about this, which I should hear back from by the 25th November.

AIBU to think that can't strike a 4 year old off without any warning? Does anybody know what the rules are with NHS dentists (I know they operate a 2 strikes and your out).

Thanks

OP posts:
MrsEricBana · 19/11/2019 21:36

"Vladimir, it's Donald. I'm going to be late for the summit. I need a poo."

Tolleshunt · 19/11/2019 21:38

Is Donald 4, then?

(Chronologically, not mentally....)

themuttsnutts · 19/11/2019 21:48

Bloody kids! My son spends ages in the bathroom as does dh. Men!

MollyWeasleysWizardsSleeve · 19/11/2019 22:00

I disagree with striking of children of that age. Their punctuality is dependant on their parents and it is not their fault if they are late. Not at 4. Fine the parents or something.

Alyic · 19/11/2019 22:10

My then 4 year old got barred by the dentist for kicking him, whilst try to put the gas thing over his face, I had offered to go in with him, but the dentist wouldn't allow.

IceCreamFace · 19/11/2019 22:10

@Cornishcharm
You don't turn up to the airport at the last minute though do you?You turn up early and plan to just mooch around the shops or sit in the waiting area until your flight is called. Likewise if you are going to see a children's theatre production you know you won't be let in if your late so you get there early. I think people can generally manage to be on time when their own money is being risked but it becomes impossible when it's just the NHS resources being wasted.

Whatjusthappenedthere · 19/11/2019 22:11

To answer your question OP. In as much as there is an answer. It’s not black and white. The GDC recommends only striking a patient from a list as a last resort and something to be handled carefully or avoided if possible. Dental Protection advises dentists to only remove a patient after a formal written warning ( unless that warning may affect someone’s mental health) . Based on this and the fact pretty much most dentists don’t want complaints to escalate, your son’s registration should be safe this time around. I would expect any formal written reply from the practice manager regarding your complaint may include a warning regarding future missed appointments or short notice cancellations. HTH.

DotBall · 19/11/2019 22:11

My old dentist wanted to take me off the list because I hadn’t been for 18m. Never missed an appointment ever in my life.

I now have a new dentist who doesn’t insist on 6m or 12m checkups to stay on their list.

OP I can sympathise with you and your DS needing a poo, but it sounds like you were cutting it far too tight with timing.

NoSquirrels · 19/11/2019 22:15

Perhaps the dentist receptionist was fed up of bowel-related delays and thinks you’re the poo troll...?

stucknoue · 19/11/2019 22:38

The d&v fair enough but not needing the toilet, you should never be cutting it that fine. I always arrive 10 mins early just for me. Yes I've had 2 kids, no we were never late for appointments despite having a kid with sn, you just need to be organised and realise that people won't wait for you

Epanoui · 19/11/2019 22:38

I think perhaps you should feed your son more fruit and vegetables. 15 minutes for a poo is absolutely not normal.

Piccalillies · 19/11/2019 22:39

How many appointments has your ds actually made it to on time?

Notodontidae · 19/11/2019 22:40

Life is about a series of hurdles we keep having to jump over, it has got so impersonal that mitigating cercumstances do not feature in it. Your late getting back to the car because your watch has stopped, you didn't see the double yellow lines, or clamping notice, you got a flat tyre on the way to work. Nobody cares. Every time I go to the Dentist, I see a different one, as the previous one has left. Just one of those things we all have to deal with.

Besidesthepoint · 19/11/2019 23:04

You shouldn't olan to be on time, you should plan to be always at least ten minutes early.

CorBlimeyGovenor · 19/11/2019 23:19

Why did you bother phoning?surely that just wasted more time? I can't see how a poo would take more than five mins? And if you'd shown up 5-10 mins late you probably still would have been seen.

VenusTiger · 19/11/2019 23:37

I’m astounded that being ill with d&v counts as a strike! Ffs, it’s not planned is it!
I agree with you OP - I think this will be one strike on the poo thing.
PPs making comments about how long it takes to have a poo - mind your own business! My DS is six and he takes for bloody ever!

spanglydangly · 20/11/2019 07:23
spanglydangly · 20/11/2019 07:26

How many appointments has your ds actually made it to on time?

Good question!

spanglydangly · 20/11/2019 07:30

@VenusTiger do you really think that people who had just changed their minds, somethings come up wouldn't use the d&v excuse if it meant not being struck off?

As for people minding their own business about how long a poo takes, if your child has this need then aim to get to appointments early. She'd already missed one.

The dentist is running a business and if everyone missed two appointments then it wouldn't work.

See the link below the OP is wasting very valuable resource.

LolaSmiles · 20/11/2019 07:37

Two strikes makes sense, but I don't think D&V should have counted first time.

That said, some dentists can be needlessly awkward. I had an appointment straight from work, left enough float time, but there was a large accident on the main dual carriageway which was causing major delays in all directions. I called ahead and said what had happened, it was all over the local news and radio updates. I told them I'd already got enough float so should be there but might be 1/2 mins late. They said it's fine.
When I got there 1-2 mins late, they refused to see me because they'd had a notification on the computer that it was classed as late. I wouldn't have minded if they'd just said up front 25 minutes earlier that they'd not see me, but to say they'd see me, let me sit through accident traffic only to say "oh no" somewhat pissed me off.

TheDarkPassenger · 20/11/2019 07:45

@MrsFrankDrebin

I feel the same way as you about the nhs and people thinking it’s ok to mess around cos it’s ‘free’ and I’m in the uk!

BellyButton85 · 20/11/2019 07:51

I notice OP hasn't returned. Probably read the first few and felt too much of a dick to come back.
Or her son is taking a very long poo

Sirzy · 20/11/2019 07:58

He is 4, so working on 6 monthly appointments he has only had about 8 dentist appointments and you have rearranged 3 of them. Two with short notice.

I can see why the dentist isn’t impressed!

runoutofideasnow · 20/11/2019 08:55

@Sirzy my sons been going since 6mo.

Sirzy · 20/11/2019 08:58

Ye and every 6 months from 6 months old is 8 or 9 appointments to being 4 (and that’s if they are every 6 months exactly!)

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