I know I am, but I still don't like it when MIL or my own mum...

[emkana]

... point out things to me that my ds does as if this was the first time it was happening and as if I needed to be told.

I'm with him all day and I generally know what he's doing.

Still I appreciate they are just pleased and proud...

I'm making the most of mine, too.

At the moment my DS2 has decided that he and his brothers will live with me 'for ever.' [soppy-smile emoticon]

To which Mr Bubble said (to me)

"No they bloody won't!"

Bubble by the time they are 14, moody, smelly, morose, spotty, with a bedroom you will never ever want to enter, you will be counting the days till they leave home
DS has a DD from a previous relationship, who has lived off and on with us, and at 11 is going through puberty, she by no means is as bad as he was, once a month she is 'horrible (but then so am I) he was for 7, yes, 7 years, in fact when i think about it was 'horrible till he married wonderful ddil.

Shoshable. That is not what I want to hear.

Must say that now at almost 29, he has become a pleasure to be around again.

Bubble, my MIL is, well look at my current name! I think part of the reason she is the way she is, is that she has 2 daughters, one of whom has children and has the upper hand with her. So it's no skin off her nose if she offends me! You will be a fab MIL! I plan to be a fab MIL and bite my tongue a lot!

It will be strange not having that 'my baby's having a baby' thing that mums with daughters must have.

I mean, hopefully my sons will have children, but it will be their DP/DWs mothers who will be the first port of call for any pregnancy/childbirth advice.

I'm a bit about that, TBH.

Will not go for DC5, in the hope of a daughter, though.

Also, that would assume that I'd have that closeness with a daughter. Not guaranteed, is it?

My mother came to visit when dd was about a month old, swooped down the path and said "How's my favourite girl". To my dd.

Cheers mum.

As for mil I will not start. The one I hated most was "Ooh, she's very advanced isn't she, just like her dad when he was young". Er, how advanced CAN a two month old be? Does it matter? Ggggrrrr.

Bubble, I have 3 boys and am ttc no 4 at the moment but have a feeling ds4 is more likely an outcome than dd! Depends on how you and the DILs get on really, I know my aunt's DIL stayed with my aunt one Christmas in preference to going to her own parents. My aunt is lovely though!

I love it when my MIL tells me who my children look/act like. All from dh's side though, as if me and my family had nothing to do with it.
Music ability, left handedness, eye colour, sports, etc.

Bubble, my Nan had 5 sons and she got on brilliantly with all her DIL. The key? She said you must always support your DIL (even over your sons) as it is the DIL's who control how much you see your sons and grandchildren. Very sensible lady!
I will be remembering that when (if) my DS ever gets married.

Oh sleepycat - I was also an incubator to my MIL's grandchild. Got sooo bored hearing how much DD looked like various relatives on her families side. DH and I used to laugh about it as it was so obvious.
I had the last laugh though, as she has grown up a little (now 2 and a half) she is the absolute spitting image of me and all comments from MIL have strangely ceased.

Absolutely, Refraggle. It's the same with anyone - if you're not an interfering busybodying cow and respects boundaries then I'm sure any future DILs will love you! Simple.

Emkana, my mum and MIL like to think they know my kids better than me and all their baby firsts happened with them around. I just let them think what they like, if it makes them happy. They're just a bit daft.

I have every intention to be good to my MIL, and we normally get on very well, but today - copied this post from my other thread:

Picked up the dd's from MIL today, sat there with ds on my lap, MIL says "When I have ds next and he's asleep I will cut his hair."

No should I, could I, do you want me to...

I said no, I'll do it myself.

If the worst your Mil does is say nice things about your kid, you've got it easy. Chill out and leave the AIBU boards for people with witches for ILs! :-)

My MIL does the constant comments on how DD resembles just about anyone from her side of the family too but tbh my family do just the same thing. I think it's only natural, especially when the two sides of the family rarely meet so it's easy to 'forget' that there's another set of genes involved too.

My Gran, bless her, used to go on when DD was born about how DD took after [insert name of random second cousin / great uncle, etc] as DD has big dark eyes, seemingly forgetting that DD's um, father has big dark eyes...

I had a complete stranger do this in the swimming pool changing rooms. She was a lovely lady and was there with her daughter and grandchildren.

My Ds2 was doing his usally pulling up, cruising etc. And she kept saying "look at him, he's standing" and things like that

She was ever so nice though

berolina, guitargirl, emkana MINE TOO !!! so glad i'm not alone !!!!!! Been feeling like a nasty horrible mean person for having such D A R K thoughts

Some of these posts sound like a desire to monopolise children's relationships.

SOunds like the mils are just trying to form their own relationship with grandchild, not intentionally piss off the mothers.

Did you not feel happy and crow about your children's achievements?

That's what grandparents like to do too (usually).

My MIL is utterly bonkers, in a good way though we get on so well.
I know she cant wait till her first grandchild is born (in november) and I know that she will probably drive me potty, but it will be lovely to know that someone will love mine and dh's baby as much as us.
As will my own mum

Aww, just re read it, how soppy!!