To be annoyed at DP getting a load of cash out?

[nancyjuice7]

DP went out last night on a works do in the city centre.

Went out at 6pm came back at 3.30am with a pizza, slept on sofa til 7 then came up to bed.
Pretty standard no issue

I've went in his wallet to get money out for a takeaway he wants and found £175 in cash, £10 and £5 notes.

He rarely has cash and work do's are always paid for, drinks food ect all night. There's no need to take money out other than a taxi.

I've thrown a strop and made him show me his banking and he withdrew £200.

He's got no explanation and I don't know wether I'm being unreasonable in being annoyed and overthinking things?

Maybe he withdrew cash to buy something for your for Christmas so you couldn't see it coming up on the bank statement.... But I don't get the fuss. Unless he withdrew all that cash and left the account short and you couldn't pay for shopping, direct debits bounced etc, I don't get the issue. And yes, several cash points give out £5 notes as well as £10s.

All I can gather from your posts is that for some reason it makes you angry if he takes draws out £200 cash. And apparently he know this, as he anticipated your mood when he tried to grab the wallet back.

I don't understand what the issue is. I no longer use cash, but in the days when I used to keep cash in my wallet, I'd probably withdraw enough to last me a month.

Why is it a problem for you that he has withdrawn this amount of cash?

You might as well have said you were angry with him for drinking a cup of tea. You haven't described any behaviour that's in any way abnormal or unusual, in my world anyway, so it's hard to understand what the problem is.

I still don't get it

The period remark was weird.

Yeah there was a campaign to get more fivers in circulation a while ago.

It's bloody annoying when you draw out £100 and get 20 £5 notes.

I have done similar though, op, on a works night out. I've enjoyed the free bar, I'm having fun etc. and then decide I'm going to make a night of it (as the youngsters at work are heading up town and I'm deluded enough to think I can keep up). So I eagerly draw a load of money out get the first bar and then decide I've had enough, leave my half drunk ridiculously over priced cocktail and scurry home with a takeaway.

You've said you were angry, but have jot stated anything he's done wrong, nor even anything you think he might be thinking of doing wrong.

There's literally no problem that you can articulate, but you're angry anyway?

Oh well if he asked you to go through his wallet, you certainly weren't snooping. I still don't get why you're so suspicious about £175 though, even if he doesn't normally carry much cash around. Maybe he plans to do something which entails paying by cash - you could ask him if you're that bothered. However it is more likely he drew a bit more out than usual so he won't have to go to the machine again quickly.

So then what was your mind leaping to?
I am still in the dark about why youd be upset about the denomination of his cash

I like to go get cash I frequently do I always draw larger sums. While traveling recently I encountered a machine that had smaller notes. That was fantastic because I only ever use cash for very small things.

He was on a night out , he wanted to open his wallet and show he had a lot of ‘folding’ my husband is like this - he likes having cash.

I’d be more annoyed it he’d spent £175

Oh well if he asked you to go through his wallet, you certainly weren't snooping

He didn't ask her to 'go through it'. He asked her to grab some money out for a takeaway.

The next thing the OP is counting all his money out and demanding to know where it came from.

OK Worral, thanks for the clarification :-).

I doubt the op will moan about his wad again, we've all told her she is being unreasonable about it. She doesn't tell her what she suspects though!

doesn't tell 'us', not 'her'.

I'd be livid if my husband raked through my purse and demanded an explanation for the contents though

This. Dp would soon regret his actions if he tried to pull this shit!

@mrsbyers Thats a strong possibility.
I feel rather guilty

I'd be a pissed off if my partner was going through my wallet, so I'd snatch my wallet too if that was the case, although I do not do anything suspicious to hide. Yes YABU to be annoyed, back off.

Seriously people jump on the "controlling" and "abusive" marks far too quickly
Yes, and yet if my husband made me count out cash and account for it I’d feel very controlled, and I’d be livid.

Yep Tesco and Clydesdale fish out fivers.

Or dish out!

If I took cash out this time of year it would be to buy DH Christmas presents without them showing on the bank statement

You started counting the money in front of him? What if he did that to you?

Did you think he stole it or he's drug dealing or something?

Maybe op is thinking of safety issues? I wouldn’t like to walk round carrying that amount of money during those hours if it wasn’t necessary. And it does seem odd. If I go out and might need £30 I would perhaps withdraw £50 just in case, but withdrawing £200 when you only need £25 or £30 seems a bit wierd.

RBH , if my DH or my DS got £200 cash out when they were planning to go out on the razzle , I'd be annoyed in case the daft buggers lost it or put themselves at risk of being mugged .

No-one needs to carry that much cash around .

shiningstar
.....buying of something he would prefer to hide from you ..for example a prostitute on a lads night out.......
............

I laughed at that because I had the same fleeting thought! Then I told myself off for having a mind like a sewer so it's good to know I'm not the only one. However he wouldn't get any change out of £200 - certainly not £175 :-).

AutumnRose1 Fri 15-Nov-19 17:53:34
Actually, now I’m wondering if you’re his pimp.....😂
.........
Oh Autumn, that is priceless :-). Even I didn't think of that. If true it's no wonder she was cross about there being only £175.

Op, we're just being lighthearted, don't be offended. Be nice to yer man tonight and he'll be nice to you.