Another mum that I know has sent her sick child into school.

[Aaarrgghhh]

Okay, so my kid and her kid play at each other’s houses once a week or so. Anyway, she told me her kid couldn’t come to mine one day as she was unwell, being sick with a tummy bug. That’s okay, it happens and I message back saying something along the lines of, that’s okay don’t worry about it I hope she feels better soon. Anyway, 48 hours after last vomit is the rule, so why was her kid in school?

It’s annoyed me because I’m sick and tired of my kids being unwell because of stupid parents like this. A cold or a cough is fair enough, if we kept our kids off for that they may never been in school, but a bug? Come on now, it’s ridiculous to send a child in to infect everyone else. Here’s why it pisses me off so much, I have a kid with a suppressed immune system, bugs aren’t good for her and depending on how bad it is she could end up in hospital, this mum knows this because I make everyone aware so they don’t bring things like bugs to my home.

Would I be unreasonable to tell the school that the child wasn’t kept off for the appropriate amount of time? I feel petty thinking about it but it’s really annoyed me and my kid isn’t the only kid in the world to have a weakened immune system, plenty of kids at the school will as well. I think this wouldn’t be as big of a deal if she didn’t annoy me in general with other things, this is like a straw that broke the camels back so to speak.

For clarity, it’s my elder child that plays with her kid outside of school and it’s my younger one that has the weakened immune system, I don’t want my elder kid bringing home bugs to her sister because of silliness like this.

FFS get a hobby or something. Wringing your hands and working out who to grass up to some Authority or other next is a rotten way to live your life - and a shitty example for your DC as wel. No one likes tell-tales, with good reason.
As a PP said, the 48-hour rule is not really much use anyway, as many bugs are contagious before the symptoms show.
And the reason they drop it in secondary school is because they expect DC by the time they have got to about 11, to be better at hand hygiene and less inclined to touch each other's food with grubby paws, as well.

If you're on benefits, I would expect you to have even more of a horror of sneaks and meddlers than most people.

OhMyDarling Oh and that too, I can’t imagine how unwell some teachers must get. I’d probably never work if I was a teacher lol. Same with nurses it’s amazing how they do it. Vomiting terrifies me and I can barely handle it as it is, let alone so often.

FFS get a hobby or something. Wringing your hands and working out who to grass up to some Authority or other next is a rotten way to live your life - and a shitty example for your DC as wel. No one likes tell-tales, with good reason.

THIS.

There's a special place in hell for horribly selfish idiots like that woman.
Unfortunately ,nothing you can do.

At best, the school can send a reminder to respect the 48h rule, but not much else.

I only wish these selfish assholes (not their kids) get repeated D&V so they end up missing more than if they had kept the kids home, but it's only wishful thinking.

working out who to grass up to some Authority or other next is a rotten way to live your life

protecting your own kids from getting sick because of some idiot is hardly the same as what you describe, don't be so childish.

Or she just lied to get out of hanging out with you??

Huh, grassing up to authority? Okay then, I haven’t said a word to the school or the mum, instead I have asked what to do on here and have decided to say nothing. So what exactly does your comment mean?

Alicia9999 Yeah, maybe. Fair enough but it’s an odd lie to tell. It’s weird to lie about your kid being unwell especially when the person you are lying to has a child that is unwell, a lot. I’d rather my kid wasn’t sick so often so I don’t see why you would lie about such a thing.

Problem is you just don’t know anything other that on Sunday she wasn’t well enough to visit.
She could have been ill Sat or early Sunday and then had monday off fitting the 48 hr rule
Plus (and you may not like this) but most are flexible on the 48 hr so a vomit at 10am would mean Tuesday school

OP, you need to channel Elsa here and LET IT GO!

Is this woman a friend of yours? Who need enemies?

Wow you don’t sound very nice at all

Child was sick on Sunday and in school on Tuesday?

What’s the problem?

I don’t think I would class her as a friend, we chat when the girls are playing but I wouldn’t message or call her to just chat or anything, like I would someone I’m friends with. I really hope that doesn’t come across as rude, I don’t know how else to put it really.

Right, but she’s not your worst enemy? Because this is something I wouldn’t do unless I genuinely hated someone.

If she was sick Sunday why not go to school Tuesday?

Don't get involved. Lots of studies show people are generally more infectious before they have the bug than after.

Find something else to occupy your mind with.

Because she was sick around 9am and I don’t know if that was the last time because it had only started early that morning. To me Tuesday seems risky because it’s cutting it fine only if she wasn’t sick again after that. But I’m saying she was in on Tuesday because I know that day for a fact. She could have been in on Monday and I think she was but I don’t know for a fact so I’m basing on Tuesday. I think I just got a bit worried because like I said before, another time when her child was sick she wanted to bring her round the next day even knowing I have a strict rule for my home when it comes to being sick with bugs etc. I’ve already said I’m not going to say anything though, I think I’d feel awkward if I did.

Good.

Anyway, she told me her kid couldn’t come to mine one day as she was unwell, being sick with a tummy bug.
I don’t know if she was sick again after that but had been throwing up at the time
She used the words tummy bug in regards to the kid being unwell so I imagine throwing up
You need to get your story straight to be honest. It went from the mum TELLING you the kid had been sick, to you IMAGINING the kid had been sick....

I'm on my first day off sick in this job.

I've been dealing with kids who tell me once they've puked up over the classroom that they threw up this morning, but Mum said they had to go to school anyway. They've all got high temperatures (as in over 39 Celsius) and look like crap.

Only one parent has been at work when I've called home for them to be picked up.

1. It might have just been an excuse.
2. You don't know when the child was last ill. If it was before 9am Sunday, school on Tuesday is fine.
3. Even if she did go back early, what could the school realistically do? Send a general reminder out? Have a word with the mum? She may guess you said something!
4. Most secondary schools don't have the 48 hour rule, so you'll have to accept it as your children get older anyway

You don't have to be rude or confrontational about it.

Just say 'Sorry; 48 hour rule in this house as X has a compromised immune system Happy to see her when she's better.'

No apology needed. Just be factual and calm.

I almost cheered when dd's teacher barred the door to a father carrying in his dd in a blanket in Yr R. She was shivering and wrapped up and he was blustering that his dw was at work and he had an important meeting. The teacher was at her fiercest and said that no way was he bringing in a child that sick.

YWBU because

• you don't know the child had D&V
• if they did, you don't know when the last incident was.

You're really over thinking this.