To invite “unwanted”guests?

[Luckybe40]

DD is turning 6, we are having a class party for her at the end of November, in about 3 weeks time. I’m just sorting the invites now to go in the school bags of her classmates tomorrow, although I already sent a message on the class what’s app 3 weeks ago to save the date for that particular day for DD’s party. DD having seen me writing the invites, has informed me that there are 3 boys in the class that she doesn’t get on with and who chase her and tease her A LOT and gang up on her and her 2 best friends. She is adamant she doesn’t want them coming to the party. I knew that she had issues with one in particular but didn’t know about the other 2. I don’t really know if I just shouldn’t send them an invitation, and hope the parents forget( not likely) or invite them against her wishes and save face. I didn’t expect her to have such a strong reaction about inviting them, however she REALLY freaked out and says she won’t go if they go... She used to be best friends with her “big” enemy and I thought it was just a blip and not a big deal...but apparently not! Anyone have experience? I’ve already sent out a save the date so...pretty sure I have to invite them but don’t want them to upset her party. She’s been telling me a few things they’ve been doing to her and it doesn’t sound great...

I would be speaking to their parents and explain that there is something going on at school which is upsetting her and it’s perhaps better this gets sorted and they can come to the next class party (which you don’t have to have). Her feelings about her safety are more important than saving face and she needs to see you show this.

People are very quick to label bad behaviour as bullying, in this case it doesn't sound like bullying. It might well be the boys have fallen out with the girls and there's a back and forth between them. Bullying involves continued and sustained harassment of someone who you have power over. If you do think it's bullying the party isn't the issue as there'll be loads of adults present and your DD will certainly not be at risk there. However if she is being bullied or even the issue is causing her distress and she's not able to resolve it herself you should certainly talk to the class teacher.