AIBU to want to boycott M&S?

[thatdamnwoman]

Marks & Spencer has made its changing rooms unisex because it is striving to be inclusive and it wants everyone to feel comfortable in whichever changing room they want. Which means that a woman like me, who wants to try on clothes in an area where I know I won't encounter men if I step outside the cubicle to see how a garment moves when I walk, is now excluded from M&S.

There's evidence that when facilities are made unisex the number of sexual incidents goes up:

www.independent.co.uk/life-style/women/sexual-assault-unisex-changing-rooms-sunday-times-women-risk-a8519086.html

I think most ordinary men are horrified at the thought of unisex facilities. They're worried that they might cause offence or be mistakenly accused of predatory behaviour. On the other hand the changing rooms will be a magnet for all those men who get a transgressive thrill from going where they shouldn't and being just a few inches away from where a woman's changing her clothing.

I've contacted M&S and they just say they want to be inclusive and if anything happens to anyone in the changing room they'll take appropriate action. But why should anything inappropriate have to happen?

This year we're having guests for four days over Christmas and I would normally be spending at least £200 at M&S. This year I'll shop elsewhere instead. And I won't be buying gifts or clothes or home stuff from them either.

Will anyone join me in a boycott?

I like it because it means my husband can wait right outside the cubicle for me and talk to me rather than being bored milling about the store until I come out

My god - is your DH so inadequate that he has to talk to you whilst you're trying on clothes? Can't his brain occupy itself for a few minutes?

YANBU

YANBU

This is a shameless c and p from the feminist boards

Just found this - equalityhumanrights.com/en/advice-and-guidance/core-guidance-using-businesses-offer-goods-facilities-and-services-public

Generally, a business which is providing separate services or single-sex services should treat a transsexual person according to the sex in which the transsexual person presents (as opposed to the physical sex they were born with, as it is unlawful to discriminate against someone because of gender reassignment Although a business can exclude a transsexual person or provide them with a different service, this is only if it can objectively justify doing so.

Clicky link

equalityhumanrights.com/en/advice-and-guidance/core-guidance-using-businesses-offer-goods-facilities-and-services-public

The trouble for me re boycotting is that no other melty middle chocolate puddings compare to M&S.... 😂

thunder

M and S don't own any factories, they will be made by someone else. I know their own brand biscuits are made by Fox's. It could be your mission to find the manufacturer.

They have an interactive map showing where things are made

interactivemap.marksandspencer.com/?sectionPID=56c359428b0c1e3d3ccdf022&regionPID=56c35a7f72529b06981917c3&markerPID=5d2cad4e2a44550e1471d05d&tagsPIDs=5aa6a3c9c6fe1dab103dd171

FWIW M&S cakes are made by Park Cakes ;) ur welcome

This just reeks of another Jessica Yaniv situation. Fuck offending people why are women constantly being underhanded to make way for others. What was the point of years of fighting for equality. We’re going back in time

Company really deserves to go bust. It's customer service is crap. Not meaning the store staff but the HQ policy making staff. I wrote them a letter donkeys years ago suggesting better lighting in their changing rooms. They arrogantly replied that their lighting was fine.

The women's clothing is beyond awful anyhow. I'm 52 and this month I tried to spend £20 on clothes to buy the beauty advent calendar. I couldn't find a single item I wanted to buy and reluctantly bought shower gel instead and I didn't even really want that. Even my mum doesn't shop there anymore.

I have bought underwear and the odd pair of shoes in the past but I've found better places to buy both now and haven't bought any clothes there for many years.

Nail in your own coffin M&S.
Someone who wants them to stay in business should send them this thread but it won't be me.

Saying that any company deserves to go bust is a shitty thing to say

All those people who would lose their jobs.

So you'd be happy for this guy to be in the cubicle next to you?

twitter.com/iamredacted/status/1191491832938717185

@midnite - that is absolutely disgusting, I hadn't even thought of someone doing that! I guess he could still take them into the men's changing rooms but he could equally be wanking himself cross eyed in a changing cubicle next to a girl/woman who he saw taking I'm underwear to try on. This has made me feel quite ill, I knew there was a reason I buy ugly old multipacks of knickers!
Regarding the PP who asked why someone would have a problem fitting a man for a bra - can you think of a single other example where it would be ok for a woman to be expected to agree to a strange man asking a woman to accompany him into a locked room and for him to get semi naked? If your daughter came home and told you that had happened to her at work you wouldn't be alarmed?

Twopups i feel confident saying that not one of poster who says they're ok with the policy will come back and answer your point.

Or to comment on the feelings, discomfort, privacy and dignity of the following groups who will be affected by this policy -

Bra fitting assistants (in fact one poster pointed out she would lose her job if she refused to fit and the poster didn't seem alarmed at this)

Ladies who specifically choose this shop for expert fittings following surgery and may need to discuss their requirements in detail whilst in their cubicle

Rape and abuse survivors

Women of faith

The vast majority of teenage girls and many women who shop with friends. One try's on clothes whilst friend stands outside cubicle (The Bag Holder!). Shopper pops out to show friend and uses different mirrors in open area of changing rooms.

I hope to be proven wrong so these issues can be debated rather than just hearing "It's not a problem/NAMALT" etc.

YANBU at all. It displays no understanding of the risks posed by men to women in changing rooms.

So you'd be happy for this guy to be in the cubicle next to you?

Filthy bugger!

Who tries on knickers anyway?

He "never buys them because they often have a damp spot" - I wonder what that's off? What a pig!

Thanks for making this public, Midnite

I like it because it means my husband can wait right outside the cubicle for me and talk to me rather than being bored milling about the store until I come out

My god - is your DH so inadequate that he has to talk to you whilst you're trying on clothes? Can't his brain occupy itself for a few minutes?

I agree Viktoria.

Can she not just buy him a comic or something?

I prefer single sex changing rooms but don't see this as a big problem. There will still be female only changing rooms for underwear. Locally to me the stores have lockable doors to the floor so are private. Many other shops only have unisex changing rooms or flimsy curtains. Swimming pools now have unisex changing rooms and this doesn't cause a problem. This could be a positive thing for Dads taking daughters out or Mums with sons.

No, there will not still be female changing rooms for underwear. Nor a female-only bra fitting service/fitting rooms.

I like it because it means my husband can wait right outside the cubicle for me and talk to me rather than being bored milling about the store until I come out

This is a wind up right? Unless your husband is 6!

No, there will NOT still be female only changing rooms for underwear.

Where do people get this idea from? Is it because it's so outrageous to let men into lingerie fitting rooms that people can't believe M&S would do it?

They have made it very clear. Both in their policy, their email responses to me and in my phone call with a manager at my local store.

Men who are 'insistent' on using the lingerie fitting rooms are allowed in.

I prefer single sex changing rooms but don't see this as a big problem. There will still be female only changing rooms for underwear. Locally to me the stores have lockable doors to the floor so are private. Many other shops only have unisex changing rooms or flimsy curtains. Swimming pools now have unisex changing rooms and this doesn't cause a problem. This could be a positive thing for Dads taking daughters out or Mums with sons

RTFT!!!

Schaden thanks for sharing. Signed.

Ross can you see how this could be a problem for others, examples provided a few posts down? Why aren't the lockable cubicles in the men's sufficient? And as pointed out by Nink lingerie fitting is now a free for all.

A pp pointed out that whilst M & S haven't always explicitly signposted according to sex it's one of those unwritten but well known things that customers go to the changing area of the department of their sex. In fact following a refurb in my local store I accidentally approached that in the men's department and was politely shown where "my" one had moved to. So it's disingenuous to compare them to those provided in stores like Urban Outfiters where facilities are deliberately not sex segregated or perhaps White Stuff where space only allows for one area. This time last week if you'd sat outside M & S changing facilities to observe traffic you would have seen ladies going to one, men going to the other.

Midnitescribbler Thanks for that. Maybe those who have no problem with men in changing rooms and are happy for their daughters to share space, in a state of undress, with perverts men should take a look.