Men sat in women's changing rooms

[nycfrog]

AIBU to get annoyed with women who plop their (male) SOs on the stools/seating in changing rooms?

Yesterday I needed the store assistant to help me with the back of a dress - on the way out of the changing rooms I realised my bare back had basically been exposed to a random bloke sat at the entrance. I know the shop assistant probably could have been more discreet but aibu to think they could sit somewhere else?

. I can choose to question why you jump to the defense of men being in women’s changing rooms..

Who has actually done this though?

Exactly, and re twisting words, think we have a big example right there.😂

My DH sits and stays where i tell him to

You're really trying to twist their words pathetic
Um...... actually read the thread, I'm only going by what's actually been written by some;

Hi @DragonontheWagon , yes, that's what we do, he wouldn't want to be near a women's changing room anyway. @nycfrog, I apologise if my comment seemed unkind to you. I was trying to make the point that there are a lot of times that we expose our backs in public, but having thought about it more carefully, I realise that an accidental exposure such as you experienced could be regarded by some men as salacious and that would be very distressing for you. I apologise unreservedly, I am sorry.

Sat outside the changing rooms or waiting seating at the entrance where people queue is totally fine in my opinion.

Sat inside the changing rooms isn't.

If someone wants a second opinion they can walk out to show their partner.

Getting wound up because men are sat at the entrance or waiting at the entrance is a bit pearl clutchy for my liking.

As is needing your dh's approval on what you buy

Oh my god what the heck is this world? Just because you are a woman that does not give you the right to dictate what others can or cannot do. Most changing rooms are unisex and men are allowed to sit and wait without being judged by the likes of you! feminism gone way too far, who the fuck cares if your back was exposed?! Please do get a grip

Oh for goodness sake it’s not about needing your husband’s approval it’s about valuing another opinion be it my mother, daughter, son , dh or friend....

Just because you are a woman that does not give you the right to dictate what others can or cannot do.

Bring a woman gives me the right to say NO to a man being in a space designed for women. The OP sad it was a changing room for women, so I don’t give a fuck if men and misogynistic women want women to give up their female only spaces, I will refuse. You don’t have to be a feminist to want to have privacy from men. What a fucking stupid thing to say.

Op said he was in the corridor by the entrance.🙄Big difference.

Op said he was in the changing room area

One of our Local M&S has a big squashy sofa at the entrance to the women’s changing room

If you sit on it you have a clear view of the entire changing room area

(I appreciate that M&S have now changed to multi sex changing rooms so it doesnt make a difference there)

If you’d bothered your arse to read the whole thread you might have noticed that OP clarified that he was in the changing room.

Cannot believe that someone suggested counsiling on this thread.

Changing rooms set ups can be abysmal. Flimsy curtains that don’t do a proper job of closing and worse mirrors on either side. No privacy for anyone. Chairs put outside the area but can see straight into changing rooms.

I’ve stopped going into stores now for clothes after I was called uptight by a staff member. All because I said loudly, I will wait until the man vacates the changing room. She kept saying don’t be silly. It’s fine. He won’t care, and when I said I did care I was called uptight.

I’ve been to places with no staff at the changing rooms. Customers expected to come out and pop their head round the wall to the entrance to call for help. Didn’t use that one either because men in the changing bit, or loitering near the entrance.

Even when I was with someone I never went shopping with him. I don’t care if you think I look good, I care about what I think. I dress for me.

I seriously do not understand the mentality of some blokes that will sit in the changing area, or wait just out and they might as well be in there anyway.

I must admit I like these threads. It gives me ideas on how to vet potential partners. Talk about shopping, convince him to go shopping and see where he sits/waits. Because even if he never goes shopping again with me, I want to know he actually respects women. And if hanging around gave no privacy then he would buggar off elsewhere without prompting.

And stores wonder why sales are going down when the privacy and dignity of their customers means nothing.

And if staff don’t want to approach someone then they ask a colleague to back them up. Or call security. Although if they cannot handle problematic customers, probably not a job for them.

I worked in a dress shop with a small amount of changing rooms

Quite often we had to tell men to leave the changing area

And not necessarily for any nefarious reasons, wife had called them in to look at the outfit or do up a dress, but they’d stand in the entrance...right in the way

it's a wonder some people manage to get dressed by themselves in the morning to make such a drama about changing room.

I have never felt the need to parade in my underwear in a changing area, I boycott communal changing rooms in gyms, and I have had huge arguments in hospitals to keep my curtains closed.
I still manage to use a cubicle and changing area the way they are designed, without flashing every passer by.

I don't care if it's male or female, I like my privacy. Someone sitting at the entrance makes 0 difference if you stick to your private space, and If I need help, I put some clothes on before coming out! How hard is it.

I never understand the mindset that it's acceptable if there are women around, but not men. Either you need privacy or you don't.

it's a wonder some people manage to get dressed by themselves in the morning if they don’t have the ability to read an OP’s post correctly and understand he was IN the changing rooms.

Pathetic that this is getting into a bun fight. The man entered the changing room through the entrance and was sat facing the cubicles. There’s diagrams and everything to prove it.

I also find it really disconcerting that women find it ok to dictate to other women what is and is acceptable for them. I do wonder the age of some of the comments on here. I was in my 20’s and 30’s once. Pre pregnancy and with a young, slender, able bodied body I probably wouldn’t have had much of an issue either.

Bottom line, if you can’t get changed in a changing room of your designated sex without your partner of the opposite sex present to either give their opinion and / or assist you to get changed, you should buy and try things on at home. Partners of the same sex are irrelevant. Now there’s even the option for next day home delivery with major retailers so you don’t even have to set foot in a shop.

Pathetic that this is getting into a bun fight

Truly a testament to the mumsnet ability to turn literally anything into an argument.

The chairs were in a stupid place. Ask the store manager to move them. End of thread. Some people like to shop with their partners, some don't, some want more privacy in changing rooms, others don't. None of that matters.

MrGsFancyNewVagina
but if you read the thread you might actually see the posts about a MAN being at the entrance or around the changing area....

not going further than the post above loitering NEAR the entrance.

how more ridiculous can you get.

MrGsFancyNewVagina threads sometimes evolve, I haven't seen many people saying the OP is unreasonable for not wanting a man inside the changing area.

Wow! This thread has gone a bit OTT.

Men in a department store, even in the lingerie section or sat outside a ladies changing room - fine.

Men sat in a changing room meant for women - not acceptable on any level.

BTW there is a men's section in our local New Look. There is also a male changing room.

You also forgot and if they have a Problem sharing spaces like this, then they need to get counsiling.

Not well to support victims of crime for example, we should be keeping safe spaces.

No the women has to adjust her life to accommodate the man.

Messed up thinking.