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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think that match betting is still gambling

205 replies

Firstimer703 · 02/11/2019 11:46

Earlier on, I sat down with my husband and son for a family breakfast. A minute or so in, DH took his phone out and when I said about not having phones at the table (as I thought we agreed), he basis he had to put a bet on. I said I didn't think that was a good reason and he wouldn't be happy if I did it and I didn't think he'd let DS do it in the future. He completely kicked off, shouting at me in front of DS and being very aggressive.

He's been doing match betting which I've asked him not to do from the start. He told me today he's disappointed that I'm not interested and haven't listened when he's tried to explain. When he has to put a bet on during a 10 minute breakfast with his family and the reason is that he'll lose money if he doesn't, it looks like addiction to me! AIBU?

OP posts:
IfIShouldFallFromGraceWithGod · 03/11/2019 08:19

As explained above MB isn't gambling
He was wrong to shout but who makes the rules
If I want to check a bet, get an offer whatever I'm an adult and will make a decision myself where I do that. It takes less than 5 minutes

Original poster
Firstimer703 · 03/11/2019 08:20

@sumolt we don't usually sit down for breakfast as a family and that's kind of the point!

OP posts:
Original poster
Firstimer703 · 03/11/2019 08:22

@PettyContractor you might be right and I'm glad you guys are helping me to see the other side!

OP posts:
Original poster
Firstimer703 · 03/11/2019 08:24

@woodchuck99 we made the rules together and he would hold me to them just as fiercely

OP posts:
Original poster
Firstimer703 · 03/11/2019 08:26

@woodchuck99 @MummytoCSJH don't you think that if we agree we wouldn't allow DS to do it as a teenager (phone at meal times) we shouldn't do it ourselves?

OP posts:
CravingCheese · 03/11/2019 08:31

YANBU.
the shouting means that he's either tyrannical and aggressive. Or that he has some sort of real problem with matched betting.

GunpowderGelatine · 03/11/2019 08:42

TBH OP you sound difficult - you're not even trying to understand that he's not gambling and doesn't have an addiction.

Let's imagine for a moment if a woman came on here said that she did matched betting to make money and got her phone out at breakfast for 2 minutes and her husband barked at her to put it away, pushed the issue when she said she wouldn't be long then accused her of having an addiction she doesn't have, refusing to listen to reasons. She'd be told it was emotional abuse and gaslighting

ineedaholidaynow · 03/11/2019 08:48

I don’t really understand matched betting, but if it is so lucrative why doesn’t everyone do that sort of betting rather than the usual betting? And I assume if everyone did the gambling industry would fold.

OtraCosaMariposa · 03/11/2019 08:51

OP you can't even get the terminology right. It's MATCHED betting in that you "match" one bet with another in the opposite direction. Not match betting.

It's not gambling. Yes there is the whole other wider issue that other people using the same sites for regular betting might have issues with gambling but is that the matched better's fault?

The issue about that OP not liking phones at the table and the DH being rude is separate.

GunpowderGelatine · 03/11/2019 09:41

@ineedaholidaynow essentially because you're only ever making how much the free bet is worth - so if the offer is a £10 free bet you'll only make around that much. Actual betting, if won, can be very lucrative. Winning accumulators can be worth thousands

ineedaholidaynow · 03/11/2019 09:47

So for people to earn £50k they must play for hours, and how do they keep getting free bets? Don’t you only get them if you set up a new account?

GunpowderGelatine · 03/11/2019 09:49

No, each bookies is different but many do regular "reload" offers so once you've signed up you can continue to profit from free bets. There are some subscription sites that summarise all the offers available at all the bookies, so you don't have to go looking. There can be up to 100 offers a day over dozens of sites

Mummadeeze · 03/11/2019 09:50

I am a matched bettor and sometimes it is critical to do something at that precise moment, otherwise you can lose money. The only risk involved is forgetting to place your bet or your technology letting you down - or someone distracting you and making you make a mistake which is probably why he got irritated. I am not excusing him being rude but you do need to concentrate on it when you are new to it so I would cut him some slack. After 6 years, i can put a bet on quickly whilst I am packing my shopping at a till in Tesco whilst chatting with the cashier, I am so used to it it is second nature to me. But cut him some slack in the beginning as it takes time to get to that point where it doesn’t interfere with your free time too much. And sometimes it is worth the distraction. On the morning of the Grand National I won’t speak to my family for about four hours but on average I make around £400 for four hours work which is worth taking that time out for.

woodchuck99 · 03/11/2019 09:57

@woodchuck99 @MummytoCSJH don't you think that if we agree we wouldn't allow DS to do it as a teenager (phone at meal times) we shouldn't do it ourselves?

No because your DH isn't a teenager and you aren't his parent who decides on what rules he must follow. From the sounds of it your DC isn't a teenager either so you can't even argue that your DH was setting a bad example. If your DH had said that he would never use his phone at the table under any circumstances then you could argue that he had broken your agreement but even then it doesn't mean that the "rule" couldn't be changed. His opinion is as valid as yours and you need to come to an agreement.You can't just insist that he does things your way and not listen when he tries to discuss.

ineedaholidaynow · 03/11/2019 09:58

So if you get it wrong (time critical) you lose money, then surely it is a form of gambling and I would assume there is a risk of addiction. Putting a bet on whilst talking to a cashier seems like an addiction to me, ie you can’t possibly miss that chance to make money. I wouldn’t start a phone call whilst talking to a cashier so why start a bet then?

woodchuck99 · 03/11/2019 10:02

@woodchuck99 we made the rules together and he would hold me to them just as fiercely

Sorry but I think it really odd to make "rules" for your partner which you then hold them to "fiercely". If he does the same thing it is even more odd. You need to discuss and come to an agreement but an agreement is not a "rule". There may be all sorts of circumstances when an agreement needs to be tweaked and this sounds like it could be one of them.

GunpowderGelatine · 03/11/2019 10:26

@ineedaholidaynow no it's not a form of gambling any more than not turning up to work (so you won't get paid) is a form of gambling. It's ensuring that you don't lose money and it's part of the process. Please do learn the basics before you comment nonsense

GunpowderGelatine · 03/11/2019 10:28

I do believe though what a PP said in that if you're susceptible to addiction or impulsive behaviour matched betting isn't for you. Simply because of things like, with free bet offers often come casino bonuses. Which, if you're lucky, can be lucrative if you play the slots and hit a jackpot with your £5 free slots bonus for example. I'm f

GunpowderGelatine · 03/11/2019 10:30

Posted too soon toddler sat on me 🙄

I'm fortunate enough to be able to wager the £5 on slots and then, once it's finished, close the game down and move on. However someone with an addictive personality could get caught up and stick another fiver on, and spiral into addiction that way. However the vast majority of people aren't like that and therefore it isn't addictive to them

chomalungma · 03/11/2019 10:31

So if you get it wrong (time critical) you lose money, then surely it is a form of gambling and I would assume there is a risk of addiction

I suppose it's a bit like putting money on shares and buying in and getting out at the right time....there is the potential to lose money if you get things wrong.

There is the potential to lose a lot of money if you get Betfair wrong - as you can have a large liability.

And of course, there are lots of offers available. I suppose you could get addicted to the offers as it's a way of making money - and some people don't want to lose that chance to make money. Hence, doing bets at the breakfast table or in the queue at Tescos.

chomalungma · 03/11/2019 10:34

m fortunate enough to be able to wager the £5 on slots and then, once it's finished, close the game down and move on

When you signed up to the betting sites, were you surprised to see how many offers there were and inducements? I was getting so many texts from companies offering me deals, reminding me about online casino offers etc. It really surprised me.

GunpowderGelatine · 03/11/2019 10:35

For those who are doing matched betting, if you make a cock up there are online tools you can use which tells you how to balance things out so that you don't end up losing money as a result of the cock up

GunpowderGelatine · 03/11/2019 10:36

@chomalungma not surprised at all, I know that bookies make money off enticing people to get that addictive kick that slots etc being, it seems quite obvious that they'd market in aggressive ways to catch those kind of people

MacabreMannequinFun · 03/11/2019 10:39

To be honest I don't see why matched bettors should explain it to people who can't be arsed to research it themselves.
If you're wondering what can be time critical, look up 2ups. If i couldn't trade out at the right time I could miss out on 200 quid profit, no way would i allow any telling off from my partner to stop me making that much.

chomalungma · 03/11/2019 10:40

if you make a cock up there are online tools you can use which tells you how to balance things out so that you don't end up losing money as a result of the cock up

Sometimes, the horse has literally bolted though Grin

Still, if ever I go on Pointless and get European football teams or UK racecourses, I know a lot more now ...

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