I think he's trying to sound tactful, not accusative.
Did you remember milk? No. I'm too busy doing your washing/cooking/cleaning/picking your children up on the way home from work/my job is important too.
Will you stop parking the car where I can't get the charger to reach mine? Fuck off.
Don't park your car there. Get milk. No. Fuck off. It's my drive too and stop barking fucking orders at me, I can't be fucking arsed with your bullshit.
The idea is to try to present things in a way that you don't interpret it as a criticism, attack or direct order.
Of course, some people will interpret any request or comment as an attack, no matter how you phrase it, but in a lot of workplaces, there is such a culture of reactive, aggressively barking, they end up having to be taught that this doesn't get the results you want anywhere near as often as a slight rephrasing. Chances are that he's had training like that and is trying to not sound like he's ordering you about or accusing you/setting you off, hence the asking if you could manage... - he's intending it to sound as though he knows you're busy, too, and things can get forgotten/overlooked, rather than being done out of pure selfishness. I'm willing to bet that a lot of the time, he's now standing sideways on, rather than facing you directly to try and make it feel less confrontational as well.
Defensiveness, deflection, distraction and going on the attack back ('how dare you speak to me like that/don't take that tone of voice with me young man if you don't want a detention/smack/sent to bed with no supper ') isn't as effective as
'I didn't have time/I forgot' or 'The shopping was too heavy to carry from the road' - even an 'I can move it now if you take over here, or would you mind doing it?' gives him a choice where he gets - or at least feels like he's got a choice.