08Daddystilllost @Blippolbblopp Regardless of what she said, you cannot deprive your kids of a grandmother just because she said something nasty about you! You have no right.
My Mum did & said some abhorrent things to me but she is my daughter's only grandparent and is a very bloody good one! She's a far better grandmother than she was a Mother. It's called learning from your mistakes.
This is not about you. There is no harm in allowing Supervised contact for a while to test the waters and see how she is with them. There are many ways of enabling contact and allowing them to have a great relationship whilst still protecting them from their abusive father
I am not depriving my children. I am protecting them. She had done many sinister things, that was just an example of one of the worst ones. She enables her DP's abusive behaviour. That was just a small example of her behaviour, When i cried to her about DP attacking me whilst i was pregnant she called me a liar and said i was trying to attention seek. When i miscarried my baby because of the attack she told everyone i wasnt even pregnant even though id already had my 12 week scan. When DP came to my house to pick up his DD and he disapeared with her for the weekend his mum did not tell me my DD was at her house safe and sound. She just let me sit there worrying
When i had to flee my hometown of 25 years and go into a hostel with my 8 month old and 2.6 year old ( because id been attacked off her son again ) she started a fundraiser for her son to "take me to court" for access for the children
When he was found guilty of assaulting me infront of my children and given a court order not to contact me or the children she told everyone how i manipulated the courts and lied 
i had police reports hospital reports and photgraphs of proof
Oh and another. My first baby died 2 hours after he was born. Recently a family member became unwell ( they live in another country ) and she created a fundraising page so all the grandkids could go over and visit, she went to the local newspaper about it! ( which is how i now as i still follow my old local paper on FB ) and she had the ordasity to name 3 of my children in the grandchildren but failed to mention that 1 is dead and 2 she hasnt seen for a very long time
I know i sound bitter. Because i am. I was 18 when i got with her son and left when i was 25. During those 7 years i was told i was a liar i was maling it up ect, she knew id given birth alone yet still told him to leave so i begged him for his help?
As i said my 1st baby died shortly after he was born, so when i had my 3rd and it was another boy i was so worried and she knew that, she knew i was frightened to death he would die too and she still told her son to leave me on my own? just reminded me actually she didnt come to DS's funeral either but went mad because i didnt want to have him buried --- not her choice that is it
Im glad i told her no and its half and half, half spite and anger and half, realistly what good will she do my children? A month before me her other son was in the local newspapwr for trying to suffocate his partner with a pillow, 6 months earlier her other son in the papers for animal abuse
She might be a better grandmother than a mother but i am not willing to risk that, shes a dangerous spiteful nasty woman, she has had so many chances ro be part of my kids lives when i was with her son and she was too focused on spiting me to keep me in my place, how dare i rock the boat by telling the truth about what went on in the family, i was supposed to brush it all under the carpet
I had to give up my entire life to make sure my babies had a nice normal life, its been really scary and isolating starting again from scratch. Weve been in temporary housing for 2 years now,
If she genuinely cared about these kids shes of been in touch as soon as it was in the papers ( she knew beforehand but lets pretend she didnt ) she would not of left it 2 years, as it happens she no doubt needs an ego boost or wants a drama of somesort
Its MN so i know its easy to assume DIL are just spiteful woman who want to break up familys but its really not the case. That woman had too many chances. My kids deserve normal people in their lives or theyll just carry on the cycle