To ask what things that pre children you would have seen as essential have now become a luxury?

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Last night on my way home from work i popped into next and treated myself to £88 worth of pyjamas / slippers / dressing gown. I am sick of being freezing and looking like a bag lady when at home. Pre children i would not have thought twice about this but for some reason now it feels like a luxury.

Non stained, matching pjs without holes have become a luxury.

AIBU to a) treat myself and b) ask what things pre children you wouldn't bat an eye about getting / doing have now become a luxury?

Time to do nothing. If I do get an afternoon to myself i feel i have to maximise it. For example I'm really tired today. A nap would have been great, but it would be good time spent unconscious! So I watched Charlotte Church documentary instead. Ha!

Sleep!!

Why are some of you denying yourself these things? I still have all the same make up, hair, nails- is it lack of money? If yes then fair enough that’s admiral that you are going without for your children. However, if it’s not and it’s just lack of time you should make time for yourself, you are just as important as any other members off your family and you deserve nice things too!

I agree Witchinaditch if there are two parents then why would you never get any time to yourself? How is that fair?

And showering, painting nails and basic care shouldn't be such a luxury. Your kids surely aren't at your side 24/7, they must at least sleep.

Time to paint my toenails. Alone. Without anyone else wanting their tiny toenails painted first. And then not liking it and wanting it removed and another colour put on, and then oh, whoops, no time left. Mummy will have to go out in flip flops with bare toenails. Again.

Trips out to cinema and for nice meals

Finger nail gels, facials, nights out, magazines

Not being a slave to their stomachs. I used to love coming in from work to a silent house, laying on the sofa, watching tv, dozing off during the news only to be woken by the awful one show theme tune and then leisurely deciding what to eat, or even if i could be bothered to eat.

Now i get in from work & darent let my arse touch the cushions because i know I'll never get up again and the kids are hungry.

And being able to go out without needing 6 months notice to coordinate free days with DH shifts, friends diaries, kids events etc.

Sleep

Also private showers, hot coffee and a stain free carpet

Sleep
Time alone
General contentment
Watching what I want on tv all in one go at the time it’s on

Daily evening baths, reading a book uninterrupted, friday dinner out, buying an expensive new lipstick ‘just because’.

Having written that, I’ve just realised that I could actually do most of those again nowadays, I just need to make the effort!

Gym membership! But pushing a pram uphill everyday for walks balances that out

It's time for me, witchinaditch. My kids don't actually sleep, it's rare to get downstairs before 9pm, then I have to eat, even if DP has prepared the food. Then it's 9.30 and half an hour before I want to go to bed. I have a lot of things I'd rather do before bed than paint my nails. The mornings are a hectic rush and people who 'get up half an hour before the kids' clearly don't bedshare as when I'm up, at least one kid is up too.

It's not forever I know that and I don't mind being their everything when they're little for such a short time. But occasionally, I do miss my old freedom.

No-one's mentioned being able to sneeze without crossing their legs or pissing themselves yet!

Sleep

A good long browse in the high street on my own without clock watching for when I have to get back to the tot. I've already decided that when DD starts school next year, I'm going to reward myself with a day shopping.

Oh and sleep, glorious sleep

Paradise laundry you have cracked me up! So funny about the Friday nights!

people who 'get up half an hour before the kids' clearly don't bedshare as when I'm up, at least one kid is up too.

I bed share and can get up without waking anyone, it's all in how you slide out the side of the bed.

I agree with PPs about making time for yourself. I very much believe that you can't pour water from an empty jug, time to replenish is vital. DH regularly travels for work so if I've been on my own with the DC for an extended period then it's even more vital I get some time for myself. One Saturday a month the DC are left with DH and I go get my hair and nails done. I go out at least once a fortnight, even if it's just over to my friend's house to drink wine and chat. If it's been a particularly long day then as soon as DH is home from work I go upstairs and read or have a bath, if any DC do appear they are sent back down to DH.

Having said that, I miss the spontaneity of being able to simply go. DH used to message me at work sometimes and ask if I wanted to go for a drink or see a film straight after work and off we would go because there was no need for us to be home by a set time. I miss being able to spend all of our money on ourselves now that we have DC eating or wearing the lions share of it. I sort of miss silence but then when I'm home alone I miss the sound of the DC.

This thread makes me never want to have kids

@Witchinaditch yes for me it’s money. DH is the same it’s not like he’s spending loads and I’m not. Easy choice to make and I know it will all be better in a few years, these are just lean times and if I have to go without nice make up or new clothes that’s fine. I’ll just wear the clothes I have.

In my pre DC days: Leaving the house on a whim, grab your purse, keys, jacket and go! These days, it takes a highly skilled operation and a few hours planning to go to the local shop for essentials.

X legs when sneezing.
I used to have no cellulite or stretch marks. I had a body that would require months in the gym to achieve but I didn't have the confidence to show it off. Post DC It's a distant memory. I still have the figure but my bikini days will never see the light again.

Some things have changed for the better: I no longer pay a beautician to wax my eyebrows into near non existence. Instead I spend time using brow templates trying to create the opposite effect.

Pedicures! I used to have one every 5 weeks without fail. Now its more like every 6 months. Yes I could do it myself but its not the same pampering treatment as when I go to the salon to have it done.

Already mentioned but buying my lunch. Now I take my own. Also, I used to buy a new winter coat each year. I've been wearing the one my husband got for Xmas for the last 5 years. (And I got it myself from Tescos while doing the weekly shop!)
Better for the environment though I suppose!

Money
Time
Clean carpet
Tidy house
Clean car interiors
Handprint free walls and windows
Health
Concentration
A lie in
A bath alone
Wearing high heels
Socialising
Using small handbags
Hobbies which require time and effort
Alcohol