To think I can go on benefits instead of returning to work?

[UniversalCreditOrNo]

NC for this.

Let me start off by saying this....up until
February last year, I have never not been in work. I got my first job at 13, was working full time and living alone at age 21 (before which I worked 25 hours a week alongside my studies) and it was only last year when I decided to go travelling that I ever found myself without employment. I got pregnant at the end of my travels, and here is where I find myself.

My daughter is now 6 months old. In 3 months time, I’m supposed to go back to work. How do people afford to do it? Childcare is £56 a day where I am. On my current minimum wage job that’s a take home of around £30 a week....before tax and NI.

My partner is on around £20k and I can rely on family for 1 day a week childcare. So here’s my AIBU. Can I go on benefits, instead of going back to work? Is that a thing people can do?!

I don’t know how it works. My area is universal credit....is there even such a category for this? It’s not jobseekers as I wouldn’t be looking for work, and it’s not like I’m signed off with illness or disability.

My partner is convinced we can because he doesn’t earn a lot and ‘this is precisely what the benefits system is for’. However....his mum is a serial benefits user....everything from being a stay at home single mum until her youngest was 15, until now where she’s signed off for an injury from 3 years ago she still claims is affecting her work ability All I can think of is the stigma behind choosing to go on benefits, but right now I can’t see another option.

@Henrysmycat
I couldn't agree more, always the easy targets, get away from the real culprits.

People slagging you off ate just jealous OP.

Not at all because the TCs are long gone and personally I wouldn't want to be on UC.

I'd never vote Tory, but Maddie is right, some people did indeed because a lot of people did take the piss with the TCs. Now everyone gets punished with UC.

The OPs partner sees it as the government's responsibility to pay for their kid.

'I live earning money' - then go do it! When we have children we make life choices! You made yours not us!
Is this post a joke?

Hold on - I think we are in such a privileged position to have free health care and benefits. These are becoming more restricted because people like the OP and others believe they will be financially better off to stay at home rather than go out to work. This may be the case but that is not what it’s for.
Benefits are for people who don’t have a choice due to ill health or life situations that stem out of their control. They are sick, they have a child who needs round the cloak care.
Quite frankly a well educated young woman like the OP should be ashamed of herself. You can work- you get a part time job or alternatively look at your budget and cut back. I’ve recently done the same , taken a career break as childcare for our children was so expensive. I would never think the government should be facilitating this.... we made big cut backs and kept going.
This is website .... what I’m entitled too that everyone is talking about is a disgrace. Unless you really need this you’re entitled to nothing! It’s your life ... you sort it.

Haven't rtft, but aren't you essentially asking if you could be a sahm and still get some benefits? If you'd phrased it that way I'm sure you'd have got a different response! Not sure the people saying you wouldn't be eligible for anything on your partner's income alone know what they're talking about! DH earns 30K and we have 1DC. According to www.entitledto.co.uk we'd get £380 universal credit pcm if I was a sahm...

I agree and I don't see how it's rude to point it out. You chose to spend your own money on travelling but now want the state to pay for you not to work?

Also, are you aware of tax free childcare? That would reduce your childcare costs by up to 20%/ £2000 a year.

I know you said your home isn't appropriate for CMing but some join together and work out of one of their homes, this might be an option of getting paid but not paying for childcare?

@Howisitparentseveningagain What difference does it make if she’s a sahm? It’s sure you to her and her husband to make ends meet? It’s not her entitlement to stay at home it’s her choice.
Even if she rephrased the question I feel she would receive the same response.

As soon as an OP says they don’t want to leave their child with strangers you just know they’re being a judgemental goady c*nt

Wish I could turn off commenting for this like you can on facebook still not reading replies but wonder if I keep posting what's now happening people will stop giving their unwanted opinions.

I went to the job centre today and they were fabulous. Exactly as some of the kinder of you suggested, I am able to go back part time and top up my wages with UC. Meaning I spend next to nothing on child care and most of time with my little one.

The lovely lady at the job centre told me this is what the majority of mums are doing these days as the cost of child care rises....I wasn't the first to come in with my questions and I won't be the last.

So yay! 29 years of paying into the system is finally helping me out

*20...not 29

He only earns 20k. There should be proper social affordable housing for hardworking families so she can stay at home and raise her child. I appreciate the system is shit now but it's the same as telling people not to bother the GP. It's fine for one parent to work and one care for the family and only the fault of a horrifically hostile society not to think it's fine. Leaving a baby to be cared for by others who you don't know, or being away every evening during the formative years is crap if one parent wants to be with them. And studying.. When did that become a privilege? We should be nurturing that! Decent council houses at low cost, as they were in the 70s and early 80s provides children with an ideal environment. What is wrong with Britain? When did you become so bitter? My husband earns well more than 100k now but if he hadn't grown up in a decent home with parents who could cope, along with full grants to go from a crappy school to Oxford along with a sense of social mobility. God help me as a 47 year old to say thank God we grew up when we did where mums may have been bitchy but the female mysogynist aspect didn't exist

That sounds great @UniversalCreditOrNo

I'm glad it's turned out

I just wanted to come back on and say that I really dislike the term "dole bludging" used upthread it basically makes deserving people who have fallen on hard times or who can't work through no fault of their own feel like absolute shit

My mind is eternally blown by how many women procreate with men who are not prepared to accept their share of the responsibility for paying for their kids and expect their partner, who has no legal protection at all in an unmarried relationship, to sacrifice her earning potential and pension to enable him to carry on living entirely unaffected, and how many women willingly do so.

I'm in my 50s and the number of women I know who now realise they are totally fucked when it comes to their pension and have now split with 'DP' is unbelievable.

Welcome to 2019, where a mother who wants to stay at home with her children is dragged over the coals. Unbelievable.

No one is dragging anyone over the coals for suggesting that they want to stay at home

It is the suggestion that someone else should pay for that choice that is questionable

Welcome to 2019, where a mother who wants to stay at home with her children is dragged over the coals. Unbelievable.

What's unbelievable is how many people expect the government to pay for their lifestyle choice. And sadly, this is part of the reason why Tories keep getting re-elected and we now shit shows like UC exist.

Plenty of non-rich people work shifts round each other to avoid childcare costs. It's about people being responsible for their own decisions.

I’m really glad for you OP. That sounds like the most sensible solution.

You may well find that you will get universal credit help with childcare costs if you are both working which makes a huge difference. 20k certainly isn't above the cut off for that.

Me and the ex worked opposites until DD was 18 months. Then we split and it was impossible to find a minimum wage job (which was all my experience) that didn't want complete flexibility, weekends and earlies or later. So I haven't returned to work and DD is 5 in a few weeks. I have been a part time student for 3 years to better our options and have recently started volunteering but for me improving employment prospects have been priority

Well that’s super that it’s worked out so well for you OP. Just try not to make nasty comments about ‘leaving children with strangers’ - it’s judgemental about the hundreds of thousands of mums and dads who use childcare.

Look at the government tax free childcare, helps a little.
The reality is no, you can’t sit on your ass on benefits while at the rest of us make the sacrifices