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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New car & my neighbour... Ignore or say something?

252 replies

Greenleafer19 · 30/10/2019 09:13

Hi all
I know MN's love a neighbour post but I may get told to get over it about this one.....

So about 12 days ago I bought a new car and since then my neighbour, who I have a joint drive with but partitioned, can't seem to take his eyes off it.
Everytime he walks his dog, 3x a day he's coming onto my side of the drive and staring at the car, staring in the windows, circling it, stands next to it staring for ages etc.. I've been off work the past 2 weeks so the cars been parked on the drive alot and He's done this everytime he walks his dog, everyday since then. It was funny to watch on the cctv at first but I'm getting a tad concerned/ peed off with it.

This morning, having had it 12 days, I thought the fascination wouldve worn off, but no... He's now gone into the road to stand back and stare at it from a distance....

I've never had any kind of relationship with my neighbour, reason being my husband and I are always at work, keep ourselves to ourselves and apart from walking his dog the neighbour never goes out for us to see him. The very rare occasion we have seen him he tends to ignore us if we smile, wave or say hi but never thought anything of it.

Do I ignore it or say something on the cctv? He knows I have cctv but doesn't seem bothered that I'm watching. I don't want to be rude to an old man but it's now annoying me! (as pathetic as I sound!)

AIBU...??!

OP posts:
OoohRhubarbLetsGo · 30/10/2019 10:27

I’m guessing it’s a Ring doorbell security system or similar, rather than dedicated CCTV that OP has set up to spy on neighbours !

It sounds a bit annoying. I’d be tempted to open the door with a big smile each time, and ask how he is - maybe ask him whether he’s thinking of changing his car. It might give you a way in to more cordial neighbourly relations. He probably doesn’t realise that you know he’s doing it.

If he is that interested in cars though, I don’t see why it’s your responsibility to provide for his needs. Can’t he admire/ polish his own car, or go to car showrooms?

TSSDNCOP · 30/10/2019 10:29

What on earth would you say?

Oh,elderly neighbour that I never talk to. I’ve SEEN YOU on CCTV watching and stroking my car and I DONT LIKE IT! I think it’s WEIRD that you’re looking at and touching my car while I watch you on CCTV doing it and I want you to STOP IT!

Wink
OoohRhubarbLetsGo · 30/10/2019 10:29

Oh cross posted there, it’s the dash cam...

Inebriati · 30/10/2019 10:32

Buy a car cover (not a sexy leopard print one.)

Ghostontoast · 30/10/2019 10:34

DH got a work lease car that had been registered in the previous year. Next-door neighbour took delivery of a brand new car a few months later, some manufacturer and colour as DH’s but higher-spec. His first comment to DH was “Hope you don’t mind I’ve got a newer, better car than you”

DH didn’t mind but neighbour obviously did Smile.

amusedbush · 30/10/2019 10:34

I can't believe how many people are saying YABU OP! Honestly that would drive me nuts. I'd have gone out after the first couple of times - his behaviour is bizarre!

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 30/10/2019 10:36

It's a 2 year old Nissan qashqai

Are you in NI, OP? Is he looking at the model name, reading it aloud and wondering why you would have bought a car which actually advertises to you that it will be a money pit? Grin

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 30/10/2019 10:38

Actually, that's me being dim and confusing my terms - I should have said 'and wondering how an object that would traditionally suffer from heavy depreciation can actually be the source of ongoing dividends.'

Wasn't really worth it, was it....

Winterdaysarehere · 30/10/2019 10:39

I once read about a man being arrested for having sex with a car...
Put a notice in the window
'I am watching you' ...
Or 'cctv in operation' if you are a wimp!!

diddl · 30/10/2019 10:40

Well you know what to use as a pic for a Christmas card this year!

Riv · 30/10/2019 10:44

Maybe ask via the CCTV if he'd like you to take his photo standing with the car or would he rather have a copy of one of the many videos?

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 30/10/2019 10:47

If it were a sleek sports car, I'd assume just a car nut, but that's not so likely with an everyday (albeit a nice one) model.

Maybe he's considering getting one himself and trying to size up every little facet of it, not realising that he could go to a car dealership where they actively encourage you to explore it in minute detail.

Maybe he fancies you and is imagining where your bottom would be sitting and how you would be touching it when you get in .

Or maybe he has wartime memories of being cooped up in a Nissen hut and is constantly marvelling at how much nicer and more comfortable they seem to be making them nowadays....

Taraswell · 30/10/2019 10:47

Webuiltthisbuffet.... What makes you ask if she's in NI?

MamaGothel · 30/10/2019 10:48

Yanbu I would absolutely hate this especially from a neighbour who has made no secret of disliking you! I would go out and ask him what he is doing... bet he would have words to say if you were on his drive, peering into one of his cars.

sarahjconnor · 30/10/2019 10:49

This reply has been deleted

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Original poster
Greenleafer19 · 30/10/2019 10:51

Update... Actually very annoyed... Just spoke to other neighbour in garden. Apparently 'car enthusiast' neighbour isn't one at all. He told nice neighbour, who has sworn me to secrecy (oops), that he said he thinks DH and I are into something dodgy because we have a new car (it's not even new or flash/ expensive!) I said to her, he has several nicer cars than us including a new BMW and a sports car. Neighbour reminded me 'do u remember 3 years ago you got a new car, he then went and bought a new car?' and said he's very petty. I didn't even think anything of it but yes 3 years ago I bought a smart car and within a week he bought a sports car. Maybe that wasn't coincidence?! But I didn't bloody care about his car!
I'm very annoyed about he thinks we' re into something dodgy.... That's obviously what he's telling neighbours! Horrible man!

OP posts:
SerenDippitty · 30/10/2019 10:53

Stick a postit notein the car window with Hello neighbourname written on it.

Original poster
Greenleafer19 · 30/10/2019 10:53

Legally, Hmm am I allowed to hose him down next time he's on my drive?

OP posts:
Inebriati · 30/10/2019 10:56

Can you get the alarm to blip every time he touches it?

LetsSlashMummy · 30/10/2019 10:57

If it's a new car and your behaviour around parking has changed, he probably thinks someone is parking there who shouldn't be. He probably think you (and your old car) are at work and he's trying to see if there's any info about a workman, address etc in the car so he can see whose it is.

ItsAllGoingToBeFine · 30/10/2019 10:57

Can you electrify the car body?

yellowallpaper · 30/10/2019 10:59

As I said, jealousy.

TheDragonFromDreams · 30/10/2019 10:59

It's a 2 year old Nissan qashqai
Are you in NI, OP? Is he looking at the model name, reading it aloud and wondering why you would have bought a car which actually advertises to you that it will be a money pit? Grin

Smile
Original poster
Greenleafer19 · 30/10/2019 11:00

@LetsSlashMummy 3 times a day, everyday for nearly 2 weeks? If he thought that, surely he'd knock on my door to let me know his concerns.... Confused

OP posts:
TheDragonFromDreams · 30/10/2019 11:01

I agree this is weird. Ignore all the people saying it’s not.

He sounds petty and irritating. I’d definitely ham up the “being dodgy” to wind him up. Maybe start wearing dark glasses all the time and looking suspicious.