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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

New car & my neighbour... Ignore or say something?

252 replies

Greenleafer19 · 30/10/2019 09:13

Hi all
I know MN's love a neighbour post but I may get told to get over it about this one.....

So about 12 days ago I bought a new car and since then my neighbour, who I have a joint drive with but partitioned, can't seem to take his eyes off it.
Everytime he walks his dog, 3x a day he's coming onto my side of the drive and staring at the car, staring in the windows, circling it, stands next to it staring for ages etc.. I've been off work the past 2 weeks so the cars been parked on the drive alot and He's done this everytime he walks his dog, everyday since then. It was funny to watch on the cctv at first but I'm getting a tad concerned/ peed off with it.

This morning, having had it 12 days, I thought the fascination wouldve worn off, but no... He's now gone into the road to stand back and stare at it from a distance....

I've never had any kind of relationship with my neighbour, reason being my husband and I are always at work, keep ourselves to ourselves and apart from walking his dog the neighbour never goes out for us to see him. The very rare occasion we have seen him he tends to ignore us if we smile, wave or say hi but never thought anything of it.

Do I ignore it or say something on the cctv? He knows I have cctv but doesn't seem bothered that I'm watching. I don't want to be rude to an old man but it's now annoying me! (as pathetic as I sound!)

AIBU...??!

OP posts:
Original poster
Greenleafer19 · 03/11/2019 17:20

@BAYouTFall nextbase bundle.. Very good

OP posts:
TheReluctantCountess · 03/11/2019 17:34

Wow. He really does have a problem, doesn’t he?

Pumpkintopf · 03/11/2019 17:34

Op I'm appalled he spoke to you like that, how awful! Would it be worth asking the police to come and have a chat with him given he's been harassing a pregnant woman?

Lulualla · 03/11/2019 17:39

I'm gobsmacked. So, in order to own a home and have an extension and a new car, you need to be a criminal? Is that why he hates you? Thinks you must be proper dodgy to have bought a house at the age of 36? And then you had the audacity to also buy a car! He's just an insane old man, but that doesn't allow him to harass you. You can report the threats to the police, and the constant staring is harassment. Call it in.

Medievalist · 03/11/2019 19:43

You absolutely should involve the police op

JenetteFranky · 03/11/2019 19:45

Ha ha you sound like you have a really high opinion of yourself- it’s probably a crap car anyway

Medievalist · 03/11/2019 19:59

Jog on Jenette Hmm

Zippetydoodahzippetyay · 03/11/2019 20:04

Definitely log it with the police. What a jerk. Good luck.

Thehop · 03/11/2019 20:06

Call 101 and tell them

Slappadabass · 03/11/2019 20:22

You need to log it with the police, all of it, mention the amount of times he has been on your property, the threat about social services etc. Write any further incidents down with the date and time and report them too.

That way, if he does take it further or reports you to SS you have proof of his harrasment.

What a horrible old man!

FizzyIce · 03/11/2019 20:26

If you think he’s going to be an even worse arsehole when you’ve had the baby I’d move before you do end up having to make a complaint to the police or whatnot as pretty sure you have to tell anyone who wants to buy your house about any issues like this .
What a nasty bastard, he needs a hobby instead of this fantasy world he’s made up

Winterdaysarehere · 03/11/2019 20:33

Police for sure. You have the right to enjoy your home. He is a pest.

BAYouTFall · 03/11/2019 21:57

Thanks Greenleafer19

loutypips · 03/11/2019 22:08

Could you set the car alarm to go off if he touches the car? If you turn the sensitivity up that might work. Or put a note on the dashboard to say smile you're on camera or something like that so he knows he's being watched

Honeyroar · 03/11/2019 22:16

Seriously, stamp on this now, call the police and report this. Hopefully they may pop round. If you've told him you'll call the police and you don't he will think he's in the right and you daren't.

WeBuiltThisBuffetOnSausageRoll · 03/11/2019 22:37

Call his bluff and tell him you're going to SS and/or the police to 'come clean' and you'd really appreciate it if he'd come with you.

He can report all of his 'concerns' about how your boringly safe and ordinary home life will adversely affect your baby, showing them all of the 'evidence' that he has of your 'criminal activities'.

Afterwards, you can report your concerns about how your neighbour's abusive, threatening and harassing activities will adversely affect your baby, showing them your ACTUAL evidence, all captured undeniably on CCTV.

Then see if they decide that one of you is behaving unacceptably and risking prosecution if not stopped immediately.

AintNobodyHereButUsChickens · 03/11/2019 23:26

Good grief he sounds unhinged! I'd love to know exactly what he thinks is going on in your house Confused

HowlinProwlin · 04/11/2019 00:29

Oh I'd love to know what he thinks is 'going on' at your house!

Some of my delightful neighbours (when I was much younger than you are now) decided that due to my age and my visitors I was...

1/ A drug dealer - this built on the fact I had found and disposed of a used needle in the back lane behind the communal garden, a place several of the residents had their grandkids playing, and I had let them know about this discovery and let the council know as well..

2/ A whore - this was on the grounds that I had several male friends visit me. So sue me, I had a lot of male friends in those days...

3/ A pedo - this one was based on the 'fact' that I had several young boys visiting my flat. In fact I had my sister and my friends 12 year old daughter visit, both of whom at the time had very short cropped hair.

They started a petition to get me evicted from my council bedsit, I got moved due to the harrassment and bullying, to a two bed semi on a nicer estate :D

Sometimes, some human beings get it into their heads that you don't belong somewhere, aren't their type, are up to no good.. and then they go to town with it. May the fleas of a thousand camels infest their armpits!

Medievalist · 04/11/2019 03:08

Call his bluff and tell him you're going to SS and/or the police to 'come clean' and you'd really appreciate it if he'd come with you.

I really wouldn't play games with someone so nasty and clearly unhinged. Just tell the police what is going on and let them deal with it.

Apolloanddaphne · 04/11/2019 04:11

What an arse he is. Let him report you to SS. I don't think they will be coming to bother you tbh. Don't give him any more head space but do report him to the police of he steps up the harassment.

Sotiredbutcannotsleep · 04/11/2019 07:14

I'd call the police or the local council to put a stop to it (our local council would come out and have a word with said neighbour). Start logging every incident at home with time/date. He sounds as if he's consumed by jealousy.

YouJustDoYou · 04/11/2019 07:21

I can't believe people on here think it's ok for someone to stand on someone else's property constantly, without invitation??! You're only all dying she's bu because he's an old man.

Just seen your update op - what a nasty individual he is. I would saving all those cctv clips of him coming on to your property and record down how he just spoke to you. Keep all evidence. What a nasty piece of shit.

Medievalist · 04/11/2019 07:30

Start logging every incident at home with time/date

Great idea

HuggedTrees · 04/11/2019 11:03

Definitely start keeping a formal diary and saving all the dash cam and CCTV footage

FloorLamp · 04/11/2019 11:34

TBH I would seriously consider moving. The relationship is not going to get any better, probably alot worse after you have your baby. It's not worth the hassle. Take the money and find somewhere with normal neighbours!