...about homeless man outside our shop.

[Ashamed2BFeeling]

Less of an AIBU and more WWYD.

Every night for the past few weeks, what we assume is a homeless man has been sitting outside the convenience store where I work. We're open till late and have a couple of pubs and a chippy right on our doorstep so have people coming in and out all night.

So we frequently have people coming in buying him food which is great to see. In fact yesterday, someone went to the chippy and bought him a portion of chips that he had to give away because someone an hour ago had already bought him chips and gravy!

A very kind lady came by just last night with a thick regatta coat and a new pair of trainers for him.

We make him a cup of tea when we're doing one and stuff but now and again, we'll get people coming in buying him beer that he's asked for. Not great but he's not causing any hassle. We've not had any complaints from customers, more concern than anything else.

But at the end of the night when we go to close up shop, he's always left. And while this is late, it's not the middle of the night or anything. I don't know where he goes.

Basically, is there something we can do for him, someone we can call? It's great that people are happy to feed him (and I'm hoping that doesn't sound patronising), but I'd love it if we could help him find a more long term solution.

Any suggestions are gratefully received.

Some really harsh comments here on a thread that the OP started to ask for how she could help.

If you don't 'approve' of begging them don't offer any help. Hope none of you are ever in a difficult financial position.

Wow some cynical responses here op. He may well be playing you all for fools but I would always go by what your gut feeling is. Streetlink or the local council could help if you think he is genuine and wants help.
I see many professional shoplifters at work who turn on the charm so I get the cynicism, but it's sad if people don't help the homeless just in case they are faking.

The thing that makes me angry is when they're sitting out in the cold, wet conditions all day/night with an animal or two in what I can only guess is there to gain more sympathy from passer bys? Seems very unfair to the animal who looks cold and miserable sitting there.

You are aware if the animal is cold and wet the PERSON is also suffering the same conditions?

I'm stunned that anyone could be so utterly detached from human emotion, but still fee does the animal

*still feel for the animal

Some really nasty people on here. I once asked a homeless chap with a dog did he have anywhere to sleep that night and he explained the council had actually offered him several flatsbut because there was a no animal policy he refused to leave his dog or give his dog up. So he slept in the cold and the rain just to be with his dog. Some of the guys are obviously professional beggars - and some are so hungry they tear the wrapper off the food and inhale what I've given them. They're not all the lying wasters some of you are being so nasty about - there but for the grace of God are you no on the streets, you have no idea what some of them my have been through. Shame on you.

My god the comments here are appalling.

I do hope anyone who thinks he's a con artist doesn't ever end up homeless or in need. He might well have accommodation but not be able to feed, clothe or keep himself warm.

Kindness is free, unless you're on MN I see.

The thing that makes me angry is when they're sitting out in the cold, wet conditions all day/night with an animal or two in what I can only guess is there to gain more sympathy from passer bys? Seems very unfair to the animal who looks cold and miserable sitting there.

Often they have chosen their pet over a hostel/ room in a flat sorted by the local authority. Often their pet is their only companion and they are stuck with an impossible choice of getting off the streets or rehoming/ euthanising their pet.

I work in a library and in the winter months we have homeless people spending time in the warmth.

I would suggest you talk to him, ask him what he needs. There will be a homeless hotline in your area you could call.

Also there will be a charity or church (if you ask around a bit) that could offer extra clothing or sleeping bags etc.

Very often they don't need food (as they get given that a lot) what they desperately need is a shower and get their clothes washed.

The PCSO's in our area are great, they make them a cup of tea and have a chat, check in with them daily get to know them and try to find the best way to help them.

Often the homeless people we meet are men, with a history of mental health problems
And/or addiction problems (not always though) and usually no family - they often come across as proud and stubborn, they are always disillusioned and feel let down and don't trust authorities and organisations to help them.

It sounds like he's being treated well where he is, so maybe less motivated to move on elsewhere. A good opportunity to try to strike up a conversation and get to know him to better see what help he needs.

I can't believe some of the comments on here, you should hang your heads in shame. In 2018 it was estimated there were 320,000 people on the streets and actually homeless. Its probably a lot more now, I think its more likely he is one of those people than not. Ask him OP if he needs help accessing local services.

And its also lovely to hear people helping him already by giving him food and drink.

Does this guy have a dog with him?

Bobbybobbins

If people want to help, far better to support a local charity who is able to help, than giving an individual stuff.
It's a bit like the "give a man a fish and he can feed himself, but give him the means to go fishing and he can support himself and his family" saying.

If you give the man a plate of chips every day for a week. He isn't hungry for a couple of hours a day. If you give that money to a charity they can use it to train someone who can advise and point many people in financial difficulty in the right direction.
Doing the former is much more about assuaging your immediate guilt, but it's not helping in the long run.

And yes, some people will try it on. Like the person I saw the other day who said they needed a hot drink. They were offered one. "Can't you give me the money?" they said. "I prefer Costa's coffee."
Having spoken to ex-homeless people they often are the people who are most vocal about giving to individuals for the immediate not being helpful. They themselves tell us to point people in the direction where they can get help not give money or items to people asking as it doesn't help long term.

Wow some bad responses on here. I'm in Manchester and the homeless here certainly don't go back to their homes at night. Life on the street is harsh. Our Mayor has set up the bedforanight charity here but is struggling to deal with the enormity of the problem. You can visibly see people get in worse shape as the days go by here, it's really sad.

When did we become so cynical, and so blind to how widescale homelessness has become?

Those people that think they recognise the man the OP is talking about, that's because there are homeless people in every large town and city now. The person you think is the same one, it's not, it's someone in very similar circumstances.

Homelessness is such a complex problem, and often those who are rough sleeping have mental health issues. This is why there is a high prevalence of ex servicemen rough sleeping, they're unable to get support for post traumatic stress disorder and the accommodation they have been offered (if any at all) is not appropriate for their condition. For those with PTSD, rough sleeping is preferable to a hostel, because it's impossible to rest in a room with multiple other people, or with sudden noises and people moving around you.

So for those suggesting he is pretending to be begging, yes, that may be true. But equally he could be someone who has done more for this country than you'll ever know, and he's been chucked on to civvy street with sod all support.

Ask him. We used to have a similar situation next to one of the local express supermarkets. People made a support Facebook page for him, would get him food etc from the shop . I used to get him cigarettes - I asked him the brand and got him a big packet, I couldn’t believe how expensive they were, and cups of tea or whatever he’d say he might need if I asked. , lots of people talked to him and offered him jobs at day rate, got given proper winter clothes etc. He was waiting for housing but was not a priority as a single middle aged man. Alcohol problems from what I understood. Very polite to everyone and would happily chat if approached, never saw him beg. I think eventually he found a place but really there wasn’t much more we could do as a community but he used to keep us updated and ask for random people to thank whoever was running the Facebook page. He was in system but no home.
I hope this helps give you more context.

We are on the South Coast here ,and in a fairly middle size town not big or small really .Saw 8 /10 rough sleepers in doorways ,and on the pavement .a distance or maybe 1/4 of a mile poss less .As we are by the Coast ,a lot of them sleep under the pier at nights.Possibly some may have a home ,but it is often called "vulnerable " as they may be sofa surfing or be in an unsafe enviroment with Drug Addicts /drunks and so on.I really doubt anyone would sleep outside if they had a choice!

Better be taken for a fool than be a cynic OP

Good lord. Of course there are real homeless people. I can only assume some of you live lives of extraordinary privilege if you’ve never encountered them. A small shopping mall near me turns into a cardboard city at night with literally dozens of people bedding down out of the weather, and walking home from work there are two or three tents up on the steps of one of the churches, and further homeless people on camp beds under a railway bridge. It’s in London, but not central, and it’s recent. It wasn’t like this even two years ago.

Manchester is particularly bad now isn't it 79? Feels like we are back in the 80s.

I tend to give money to homeless charities rather than individuals. Some homeless people are very wary of institutional type help though.

"Hardly any genuine homeless"!!! What disgusting attitudes on this thread.

Of course there are genuine homeless people and far too many of them. NO ONE should be homeless in this day and age

He could have gone home. In our town there a lot of well known beggars that aren't homeless. Still a good idea to give him food though and not money for drugs!

Very very few homeless people eh?

320,000 people is very very few to you?

And that’s just those who are known.

To all the PP saying he’s faking it and goes back to a nice warm home at night, where DO you get your ‘facts’ from? Just want to check if it’s the Daily Fail or the Sun.

He will have moved on to the next place to earn some money or found shelter behind an air con extractor with his cardboard boxes.
It's so sad to see, but lovely that people are so practical in their help.

We have emergency accommodation and hostel for homeless people, but they need to be clean of drugs and alcohol to access them. They are also not allowed to beg whilst there.
I don't suppose this is so appealing to the drug addicts, and alcoholics as they need to beg to fund their addiction.

Drier

I support the homeless in my area and have heard that a couple of our regular homeless go back to a flat.
It's not your usual flat with mod cons though, it's a mattress on the floor, but a flat nethertheless.

He will have gone 'home', to where ever that may be

If you're concerned there will be homeless charities in your area. However id imagine he'd be well aware of them.

Honestly if hes been living as a homeless person for a while he'll know what helps out there and whats not.

Speak to him and find out though.