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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To give them their poxy bottle of wine back?

144 replies

Rainatnight · 27/10/2019 03:37

New NDN are having a massive party. Still going on - very noisy.

They came round a week ago with a note about it and a bottle of wine. DP thought it was lovely. I was deeply suspicious and I’ve been proved right. Grin

The DC are going to be up in two hours (they don’t know about the clocks) and I feel slightly deranged.

I want to give their poxy bottle of cheap white back to them.

(I won’t. I just felt like a rant. But FFS).

OP posts:
Dongdingdong · 27/10/2019 07:58

Dingdong - so a polite 'turn the music down' works at 4am does it?

To be fair, the OP didn’t mention in her first post that she’d asked them to turn it down a few times already before storming round at 4am. Which changes things somewhat.

But personally I wouldn’t call the police on my new neighbours after one party as I wouldn’t want to sour relations. I’d wait to see how things played out. If it was every weekend then that’s different, but they might never have a party again.

Dongdingdong · 27/10/2019 08:00

Anyway, it’s easy for me to say as if I was in the OP’s position I’d be absolutely fuming too.

AfterSomeAdvice1234 · 27/10/2019 08:01

YADNBU! We have had this before. Most of the time, they have turned the music off immediately very apologetically and never done it again. However one house turned it off and then proceeded to repeat every week or two so we reported them to environmental health, ASBU, police, and recorded correspondence with our local councillors. That worked. Also where we are, 'unreasonable noise' is not allowed at any time, and all noise (within reason) must stop at 11pm, so even letting them disturb your sleep until midnight would have been generous.

museumsandgalleries666 · 27/10/2019 08:02

Pop round at 6am morning after the party with a cheery smile and hold your finger on the doorbell , when they answer be nice and friendly and say you hope they had a lovely party 😆

Original poster
Rainatnight · 27/10/2019 08:07

Yes, sorry, DingDong that wasn’t clear. We rang, then texted, then went round.

To a PP asking, they’re tenants. The landlord is actually a very well known person who lived abroad now. I don’t have her contact details - unless I tweeted her!

OP posts:
Littlemissdaredevil · 27/10/2019 08:08

Tweet the landlord!

Pinkyyy · 27/10/2019 08:08

I don't think you're being a single bit unreasonable and I think you were far more tolerant than most people would have been. It wouldn't have taken me until 3am to say something.

If you'd have let it slide that would have been taken as an invitation to have another 'party' at Christmas. Then new years... Then every other holiday you can think of. You've done the right thing, this type of behaviour needs to be nipped in the bud.

Original poster
Rainatnight · 27/10/2019 08:13

But should I give the wine back? Grin

OP posts:
WhinyWa · 27/10/2019 08:16

Ah that's why they don't give a fuck... because they're renting.

Pinkyyy · 27/10/2019 08:17

Keep the wine and return it to them when you've planned a partyWink

WhinyWa · 27/10/2019 08:17

Pour it through they're letterbox

WhinyWa · 27/10/2019 08:18

Argh their. Sounds like I have had wine

Vulpine · 27/10/2019 08:22

Ah now i want to know who the well known person is! Is it adele? Lilly allen? Jackie collins? Grin

buckeejit · 27/10/2019 08:28

Ha! I'm tempted to agree with @WhinyWa on that one!

Inconsiderate feckers

Leflic · 27/10/2019 08:29

I’m interested that you can have a bottle of wine in the house for a week unopened. Especially when you’ve been up all Saturday night. MN never fails to educate.

Original poster
Rainatnight · 27/10/2019 08:30

Grin @Leflic We’re on a bit of a low alcohol kick at the moment. And it’s white, which we don’t even bloody drink!

Not Adele or anyone like that. I probably should have said ‘well-known’, rather than ‘very well-known’.

OP posts:
TheStuffedPenguin · 27/10/2019 08:36

Rugby starting soon. Crank it up!

VirtualHamster · 27/10/2019 08:46

Are people not allowed to have parties anymore?

Parties with loud music until 5am have never been 'allowed', not even if you invite the neighbours or give them a bottle of wine.

Unfortunately a lot of people think disturbing their neighbours is some sort of right if it's only occasionally

AssangesCat · 27/10/2019 08:46

We are surrounded by student flats so I've been there and got the t-shirt, up to and including attending a council hearing to oppose the HMO license. We got the number of tenants reduced from 5 to 3 in the flat below. This costs the landlord money of course so he's keen to have a repeat and tenants are carefully vetted now.

I don't care if they tell me it's a one off.
I don't care if they give me a bottle of wine or a box of chocolates.
I don't care if they tel me in advance.
I don't care if I'm invited.
I'll call 101 at the earliest opportunity, as it takes a while for the police or the council to respond. Where I live it is specifically a matter for 101, the council and police share the calls depending who's available.
I'll complain to the landlord and/or letting agency. I have come close to calling the landlord at home in the middle of the night but not quite crossed the line.
I'll note the dates and times of each incident.
I'll join forces with my other neighbours (multiple complaints at the same time, make sure we all have up to date details for letting agent etc).
When the HMO renewal is advertised we have opposed it and the council heard a police report of all the call outs to the address, as well as our own record of lesser incidents.

I tried being nice for a while. It did not work.

Belfield · 27/10/2019 08:48

I'd tweet the landlord or pm them if you can find their Facebook. 5am is a non runner

Ginfordinner · 27/10/2019 08:52

Next time they have a party they should pay for you to stay in a hotel or B & B.

Neron · 27/10/2019 08:55

YADNBU!! House party for new neighbours ok, tolerate it for the sake of peaceful neighbour relationships - but until 5am is a joke. They didn't give a shit about you, so I would tweet their landlord. Why should you have to put up with an hours sleep on your day off.

stucknoue · 27/10/2019 09:02

I suppose it depends on the volume inside your house, frequency of parties (they are new so this is unknown) etc. I must admit I have a detached house so it's not an issue for us but a few times a year a late (2am) party is reasonable, every week is not

Sagradafamiliar · 27/10/2019 09:06

It's the council you need to get in touch with, or police.
If neighbours think you're cool with one-off parties, next thing you know they're taking the piss and ramping up the music every night.

Bellringer · 27/10/2019 09:15

Our neighbour has a party 2pm sat till 10am sun on his birthday every year. Never makes a peep any other time so we put up with it, including loud talking under our window.