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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

AIBU to think she shouldn't of taken my old toys?

244 replies

unicornsandrainbows98 · 26/10/2019 21:38

So my mums sorting out her attic as she's moving house. 19 years worth of stuff.
So my aunt (her sister came round to help). When we was younger my aunt gave me and my sister all of my cousins old hand me down Disney toys which we loved and played with constantly for years. My cousins (her children) are around 5-6 years older than me and my sister so there was a little bit of an age gap but not huge.
Anyway enough drip feeding, I had asked my mum to put them toys aside because I now have a 20 month old son who loves Disney and would love the toys and appreciate them e.t.c. My aunt has taken ALL of the toys home with her saying they're were her kids' toys once. 1. My cousin is gay and married but I know for a fact they don't want children in the future or ever. 2.my other cousin does not want children either and 3. They're all like nearly 30 years old? They are just going to be sitting in an attic again waiting to be played with? Aibu to think realistically they should of gone to my son and we should of got to keep them as they was handed down to us in the first place? Sorry this post sounds so petty but I would of loved to see my little one play with the same toys I had so much fun with as a kid!

OP posts:
TheFatberg · 26/10/2019 21:40

Just here to see how long it is until a pedant turns up...

ChazsBrilliantAttitude · 26/10/2019 21:56

It depends. If your aunt had only loaned the toys then she is entitled to them back. They may also hold sentimental memories for her. It was really for your DM to sort out.

Having said that, I can understand why you are upset too.

bridgetreilly · 26/10/2019 21:57

They're her toys.

Boobiliboobiliboo · 26/10/2019 21:58

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Namechangeforthiscancershit · 26/10/2019 21:58

It was a really long loan by the sounds of it.

It would make sense for her to give them to a child who will play with them now but for whatever reason she hasn't chosen to.

Trying so hard not to be the twatty pedant.

littledrummergirl · 26/10/2019 22:00

Me too Boobiliboobiliboo.

Thoughtlessinengland · 26/10/2019 22:00

sitting on hands too 😂

firstimemamma · 26/10/2019 22:00

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Carparkticket · 26/10/2019 22:03

@TheFatbergGrin

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 26/10/2019 22:04

So much hand sitting amongst us...

MereDintofPandiculation · 26/10/2019 22:04

TheFatberg was the first of six pedants to arrive. To notice and say you've noticed is pedantry, it doesn't need you to spell out what you've seen.

LL83 · 26/10/2019 22:05

They are 30 year old toys ffs. Can you share them?

Her reasons to keep them are also valid. Does she know you wanted them? If not ask for a few.

If you knew your mum was clearing out why haven't you already taken toys? If your aunt went over and did all the hard work clearing attic I think she should get first refusal on anything your mum doesn't want.

Wildorchidz · 26/10/2019 22:06

We have given some of our kids outgrown toys to nieces and nephews. However we will definitely be taking them back at some stage - Brio trainsets, Sylvanian families, hotwheel car sets and Lego. I now realise that I should make this clear to my siblings that this is the case.

LionelRitchieStoleMyNotebook · 26/10/2019 22:07

Break the cycle. Wean him off the Disney propaganda, see this as a blessing in disguise.

Have.

TheFatberg · 26/10/2019 22:08

MereDintofPandiculation I hope you're counting yourself in the six as you seem like someone who likes to point things out.

TheMustressMhor · 26/10/2019 22:08

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Bobthefisherghoulswife · 26/10/2019 22:08

Hmm, it's a hard one, because she bought them for her children, then passed them on to you and your siblings. Your mum kept hold of them, she claimed them back. However, if you're mum hadn't kept them, would she have returned them to your aunt or taken them to a charity shop?

Also controlling twitchy fingers.

missmouse101 · 26/10/2019 22:08

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LL83 · 26/10/2019 22:09

Glad all the non-pedants are so mature and not petty like the actual pedants. Ffs get a life.

Original poster
unicornsandrainbows98 · 26/10/2019 22:09

My mum said she did want them before hand throughout the years and before they started. My sister was also there and said she wanted them too even just a couple. I would of gone round there but she lives about an hours drive and I don't have a car and she is also disabled and can't get in the attic on her own. Either way I'm just gonna have to suck it up and get on with it because she ain't gunna be giving them back just thought it was a little unfair that's all

OP posts:
NoSquirrels · 26/10/2019 22:09

Did your mum ask your aunt to leave a few for your son, and she refused?

Or did your mum not mention it and perhaps your aunt thought she’d was helping - after all they were ‘clearing the house’?

What’s your relationship like with your aunt - could you ask her if she’d mind lending your DS a few toys, and tell her how much you loved and appreciated them as a child? You can offer to return them when he’s grown out of them.

ElizaDee · 26/10/2019 22:10

just here to see how long until a pedant turns up

My eyes were itching.

TheFatberg · 26/10/2019 22:10

LL83 you're also on Mumsnet on a Saturday night so don't be throwing too many stones in your glass house.

Carparkticket · 26/10/2019 22:10

We have given some of our kids outgrown toys to nieces and nephews. However we will definitely be taking them back at some stage - Brio trainsets, Sylvanian families, hotwheel car sets and Lego. I now realise that I should make this clear to my siblings that this is the case

But of course!
I have always been very clear with “you can use this but I want it back when outgrown” or “you can pass it on after you are done, I won’t want it back”
You say you “have given” in that case I don’t think you can expect it back. And I don’t think toys can be given and taken back, clothes or stuff like that maybe

Namechangeforthiscancershit · 26/10/2019 22:11

It's not unfair if it's her stuff- she can do what she wants with her toys.

After 19 years in the attic they're presumably not in the best state anyway?