Is a wedding day worth it?

[CallieCat19]

Hi,
Posting on here for traffic

Just wondering what people thoughts on their wedding day was really, is it worth the money?

Like most girls I’ve been imagining what my wedding would be like since I was little but now I’m older I’m wondering if it’s worth all the money? I’d feel so guilty spending thousands of pounds on a day when there’s so much more important things the money could go on. But then if I didn’t have a wedding day I think I would feel a bit sad because it’s what I always imagined.
Any thoughts?

Me and DH often say we wish we hadn’t spent all the £££. We wish we had just done it on our own somewhere. A lot of people who came are no longer in touch with us as we moved and had kids etc. So tons of people in our photos are now long gone from our lives. I mean, we had a nice day for sure but if I could have a do-over we would go away the two of us and get married.

Me and dh could easily of afforded a big wedding day, but we didn’t. We married just us and our parents in San Francisco, it was perfect.

A massive wedding to me = A lot of stress. Why pay for stress?

Definitely not worth it. You can so easily get caught up in the wedding industry selling you all sorts of "must haves". A simple ceremony to legally protect you would do the necessary and leave you with £000s to improve your life in the long term. Whether that is a house deposit/paying off mortgage/education/travel or whatever.

By all means have a celebratory party later - just don't mention the W word.

Like most girls I’ve been imagining what my wedding would be like since I was little but now I’m older I’m wondering if it’s worth all the money?

I find that^ really sad.

You don't need to spend thousands, many people have a joyous time having only spent a couple of hundred.

My first wedding (aged 23) cost over £25k. Parents paid. It lasted 3 years before now ex husband cheated. It was a nice day but now I think what I could have done with that money instead it makes me cringe.

I got married last year to the most amazing man, we went to a hotel with just the kids and our parents, ceremony, afternoon tea, 2 night stay with spa and dinners. Cost under £3k. I wouldn’t have wished for anything else.

Like fuckloadofcheese We both say now we wouldn't have spent anywhere near what we did, however sometimes I think you need the experience so you have no regrets (assuming you dont get into debt)

All that matters now is he's my husband and im his wife, the wedding was a day, our marriage (I hope) is forever

Spend it on the honeymoon!! Seriously 1 Ridiculously expensive day vs 14+ glorious days with your new husband in a preferably exotic location. If I had my time again 😉

Just remembered, I used to work at a local government office overlooking the registry office. A couple drove up in a clapped out car wearing matching stripey pyjamas. They looked so happy and it was so cute! And then off they drove afterwards.

You can easily get into a mindset of FOMO re weddings but it’s a whole heap of hassle and stress which is over in a day.

We are getting married in December and it's costing about £1000 for everything. There are only 8 guests (plus our baby DD) and it's very informal and low key, but I'm still very excited about it It'll be a lovely day with the people we love most. Neither of us enjoy big gatherings of people or being the centre of attention particularly, so a small ceremony and then a nice meal out is perfect for us. Maybe think about which aspects of a wedding are actually important to you and which are things that seem important but actually aren't.

My wedding cost £20k. It was a fantastic day with all our friends and I absolutely loved it. I remember it happily often and it was definitely worth it despite the horrendous cost. I've been married 11 years and counting now.

We had a low key wedding and I don’t regret it al all. It was the marriage that was important to me not the wedding day.

Going to go against the grain. Ours was totally worth it! Having everyone we love in one room having fun and laughing together, especially people who hadn’t met before, was incredible. Best day ever and I still grin to myself whenever I think about it.

It seems quite fashionable nowadays to bash large weddings.

The best wedding I went to was a large and expensive wedding with all the bride and grooms family and friends who have travelled from all corners of the world. Yes they spent a lot but it was worth it to them.

Ours was prob around £5-7k and it was worth it imo

Close friend of mine got married, beautiful wedding, stunning pictures. 2 years after her husband discovered she'd taken out a load of loans to help pay for it, they nearly separated- they didnt but they have had to delay having children - was it worth it?!!....hmmm probably not

Oh and we are having separate smaller celebrations, such as meals or drinks out, with people who aren't coming but we are close to so we can spend quality time together. My issue with a bigger wedding is that I want to spend time with the guests, and it's impossible to do so when you have a lot of people. This way, we have a good excuse for a few evenings out with our friends to celebrate and actually spend time together

I would never have spent thousands. Registry office then a party in a pub. Much less stressful as well.

Going against the grain, my wedding cost about £12 grand and it was totally worth it. For us our wedding was also about our families coming together and we loved seeing them all together having a wonderful time. It was fantastic fun and wonderful to have all the people we loved together for the best party ever. If you’re not into your wider family then I can see why you might not want to celebrate with them but for us it was worth every penny

If I could do it again id do it way cheaper. As in, id do it at a local church then maybe at a town hall. The people that are there are the ones that matter.

I'll let you know in 6 months lol. We're spending a lot. But we both earn a lot and have no big expenses. We're late 20s so have plenty of time to earn money in the future. And obviously there will be better things to spend money on but we wanted to spend it on our wedding. We have a lot of people we want to be there. At the end of the day my friends said the things people remember is the food and the music so that's where the majority of our money went. Ours will be between 15-20k and my mum bought by dress and PIL gave a contribution.

It's such a personal thing. Loads of people will say it's not worth it but that's their experience which is so personal to them. DH and I had a biggish wedding with 150 guests. We loved it and don't regret it for a moment as we wanted a big celebration like that so to us, yes it's definitely worth it for the memories. You do you basically. Mumsnet tends to be quite cynical of big "proper" weddings so expect the replies to be biased.

I'd do something much more chilled - get married at 4pm, hire a local function room and get pizzas, have speeches and a good evening of dancing and drinking!

We went to St Lucia to get married, just the two of us, it was wonderful. Some family were a bit upset that we did it like that but understood it was what we wanted. I did feel like we missed out on a big wedding though, so several years later we had a church blessing followed by a do at a country hotel for 100+ people. It was fab and was reasonably priced as did in winter so out of wedding season. We did it for around £3000 (10 yrs ago). We did the blessing at 3pm followed by a high tea at the hotel, had hotel dj and a hot buffet of chilli/curry at 9pm. Both amounted to total of £9000.

Ours was tiny, just close family, no stress, no fuss, didn’t cost a lot. Wouldn’t have changed a thing.

My sister’s was tens of thousands, mega fuss, considerable stress, breathtaking location, tons of guests, to die for dress, truly epic. She loved it and wouldn’t have changed a thing.

Both marriages happy and young strong.