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Original poster

To wear leggings to DD's University Graduation?

354 replies

OneToughMudderFudder · 15/10/2019 10:17

Big row this morning as DD wants me to wear a bloody evening dress like she is Hmm.

I'd planned to wear my new knee high brown boots, camel knee length coat with a black polo neck and leggings underneath.

DH (who is wearing a suit) and DD are horrified. It's a daytime ceremony.

Who's BU?

OP posts:
JohnnyMcGrathSaysFuckOff · 15/10/2019 18:40

OP I stand on a graduation stage shaking hands once a year.

Plain office dress or tea dress (Monsoon is a good bet, sometimes Hobbs) with sensible low heels that you can walk in, e.g. nice leather shoes in 1.5" heel.

Comfortable, practical, smart.

The graduands at my current post 92 are dressed in a variety of day dresses and sometimes more daring things!

When I was at Oxford, it was sub fusc i.e. black trousers or skirt + white top for women, suits for men.

However, the point is, it's all 'dressing up'. Most dads wear suits and mums wear nice trousers plus blouse or more likely, a 'day wedding' style dress.

Don't do over the knee boots unless you are Andrea Leadsom!

rainingallday · 15/10/2019 18:50

@OneToughMudderFudder

No way. You're not going to a garden centre! You're going to a big event.

Dress decently. My DC would never have forgiven me if I had turned up at their Graduations dressed like I was going to do some weeding in the garden!

Aridane · 15/10/2019 18:58

@rainingallday Grin

Lazysundays18 · 15/10/2019 19:05

I've graduated twice - undergrad and masters - and everyone was dressed up (including my parents). It's her day. I'd just do as she asks and keep the focus on her rather than making it about your leggings.

mumwon · 15/10/2019 19:14

one of my dc was at Russell Group Uni one was not wore similar clothes to both fitted in with both, smart skirt (hobbled in) low heels, top & light weight jacket, you will presumably have photo with them afterwards & be introduced to their tutors & friends & possibly their m&d - she is worried about her friends - from my observation most tutors are usually more casual (scruffier) during the term ( our psych tutor wore football team shirt most of the time, our sociology tutor use to wear black t shirt & jeans, & some of the other staff had more unusual (!!) styles, so they wouldn't probably notice or judge! & don't get me started on the social workers - :)

RopeBrick · 15/10/2019 19:27

Wow, you really should dress up. It's her big day, why are stressing her out?

NameChange84 · 15/10/2019 19:30

A) Your daughter isn't really wearing an "evening dress" is she? You've led people to think she is attending in a ball gown or floor length sparkling cruise wear when I suspect that the reality is that she is wearing a smart dress that could be worn to a wedding or christening. If the latter is the case it is appropriate.

B) I teach at a university and have a few degrees myself. I have never seen anyone in attendance in leggings or over the knee boots. It really would be inappropriate. Smart office wear or day guest to a wedding/christening etc is the way to go. It is a formal event. It's best to aim for a classy look. Leggings or over the knee boots don't exactly suggest that to me.

C) For all the posters saying the daughter should wear something with buttons, she really doesn't have to unless the university has a very strict dress code. Hoods no longer need to be attached to buttons. I always wore a smart tailored dress as I don't "do" shirts and had no problems attaching the hood. I either attached it to a small discreet brooch that had sentimental value or pinned it. Many women who did wear shirts to my first graduation found that the weight of the hood made their shirts gape around the bust area and spent the day self conscious and fiddling with their shirts and hoods. Most female students do now wear a nice dress to graduate and we see less suits and shirts etc than we used to.

JenniferM1989 · 15/10/2019 19:31

A polo neck as in a short polo neck top with leggings? 🤔

If you mean a polo neck dress type thing with leggings, boots and a nice coat, that would be ok

DappledThings · 15/10/2019 19:32

A polo neck as in a short polo neck top

No, that would be a polo shirt. A polo neck is a jumper

JenniferM1989 · 15/10/2019 19:37

I know what a polo neck is, it's a turtle neck type top/jumper. What I mean is, will it be short as in bum length or more of a polo neck dress type that looks like a dress worn with leggings and boots. If it's a standard polo neck jumper worn with leggings, I would say that's what most people would lounge about in, in their house or wear to the shop, not to a graduation 😵

DappledThings · 15/10/2019 19:41

What I mean is, will it be short as in bum length or more of a polo neck dress type

Ah. See I would call one of those a polo neck and one a polo neck dress!

NameChange84 · 15/10/2019 19:45

Ah. See I would call one of those a polo neck and one a polo neck dress!

Jennifer did Confused

^A polo neck as in a short polo neck top with leggings? 🤔

If you mean a polo neck dress type thing...^

I wondered what made you get Polo shirt from that post at the time too.

Mookie81 · 15/10/2019 19:47

Evening dress is extreme but leggings to your child's graduation is really trampy. Have some respect.

Sceptre86 · 15/10/2019 19:52

I would say you are. Leggings are too casual for a graduation, I would wear a dress or trouser suit. An evening gown is a bit over the top in my opinion though, what about a day dress? She needs to think about how comfortable she is going to be walking up and down stairs and well as across a stage in heels (presumably) and an evening dress! Also there is a lot of queueing and waiting around on graduation day so I would consider that too.

DappledThings · 15/10/2019 19:56

Jennifer did

Yes, but found the OP's use of polo neck ambiguous as it could mean a jumper or a jumper dress. I'm saying I would only use polo neck to mean a jumper and if it wasnt a jumper I would always include the word dress so i didn't see the OP as ambiguous.

CherryPavlova · 15/10/2019 20:01

Imagine you’re going to a low key wedding. Not morning suit but lounge suit for father’s with corresponding smart daywear for mothers.
Definitely not leggings and over the knee boots - too much of a night in a bar look.
Summer graduation usually means tea dress and jacket or similar. There’ll be photographs, meeting friends parents, a meal (I imagine you’re going out to celebrate).
Don’t make her feel embarrassed by her mothers choice of outfits.

PapayaCoconut · 15/10/2019 20:03

My mother wore leggings with a tunic and a pair of ballet flats to my graduation. I was not impressed. She looked like she was going to the supermarket for her weekly shop.

OooErMissus · 15/10/2019 20:04

Why the hell are people bringing polo shirts into it?!

The OP clearly said a polo neck in her OP.

shinynewapple · 15/10/2019 20:42

If you want to wear your boots and coat then couldn't you wear a nice knee-length dress and tights with them?

Heartofglass12345 · 15/10/2019 21:09

Where are people getting over the knee boots from when she said knee high boots Hmm

Heartofglass12345 · 15/10/2019 21:12

Ignore me I just saw the post about the over the knee boots. I wouldn't wear over the knee boots ever lol

WanderingTrolley1 · 15/10/2019 21:14

Yabu.

Leggings are for lounging, doing your shopping in. Make an effort for your daughter!

Cantrememberpassword · 15/10/2019 21:14

Would depend on your weight, if you have a big fat bum that flaps about like two ferrets in a sack then it’s no to leggings.

MouthyHarpy · 15/10/2019 21:18

You are.

You will feel and be underdressed - well, certainly at the university I teach at.

steff13 · 15/10/2019 23:56

OooErMissus I brought up polo shirts, because a polo neck isn't "a thing" in the US, which is where I am. And which I specified in my post. I thought it was been clear, but perhaps not...🤷