DH just asked me not to fart in front of him

[Nobhobs]

I don't make a point of doing it, but every now and then it happens. It's natural and can't always be helped? He on the other hand forces out massive loud farts, makes eye contact and faces whilst he does it. I usually roll my eyes and laugh/shake my head but all in good humour. Just sat on the sofa and I let out a small one (not loud, forced or smelly) and he sighed and said "seriously can you please not fart in front of me"

I'm a bit lost for words. I'm actually a bit upset with him. He's my bloody husband and now I need to feel insecure about farting? We're completely comfortable around each other, I've just had our bloody baby he's seen far worse than a little fart. He thinks IBU for getting upset about it and thinks it's a fair request. I think he's being an arsehole.

Dp comments on the stink sometimes but tbf they are pretty vile!

Ha, mine's the same - he'll say "WTF has something crawled up your arse and died?"
Me - laughing but well can't really argue with that lol

DH truly believes the following. Women should not swear, Fart, wear anything tarty outside the bedroom, get drunk, argue/disagree, especially after a drink, because that is when women are not in full charge of their senses. are you're married to him why?

I dare you to fart in his face when he is falling asleep!

I'm amazed that people can get naked and sweaty together, let their partner put his penis inside them, potential put said penis in their mouth etc but balk at the idea of letting out wind in their vicinity.

@PickAChew is right.

I was going to say, 'what are you supposed to do, leave the room?' But PAC is right, you should ask him to leave it.

DH truly believes the following. Women should not swear, Fart, wear anything tarty outside the bedroom, get drunk, argue/disagree, especially after a drink, because that is when women are not in full charge of their senses.

I saw this and started to type a response as well but deleted it all lol
I'd do them all on purpose just to piss him off it was mine
Bollox to ladylike lol

He’s a chauvinistic pig

@WotchaTalkinBoutWillis that phrase has been used here many a time!

Especially when I eat onions...

Please ask him why it's ok for him and not for you! I'm dying to know the answer!

That's so unfair!

I can only hope that he leaps up immediately, delicate nostrils aquiver, to change the baby's nappy before you even realise anything's happened.

Unfortunately it comes with having just pushed a baby out.
What's your excuse for incontinence? At least I don't follow through.
That should do it.

I’m 41 and dh and I have been married 16 years and I’ve heard him fart twice (not deliberate/ he didn’t realise I was there) and ive never once farted in front of him!

Now boggling as to how you get to 41, married for 16 years and you've only heard him fart twice (accidentally)
42 here, together for 25 and fart openly lol

@FoodWoes you’ve just floated a great Facebook DIY gift idea... I can see festival themed fart jars. For Xmas you can’t go wrong with a little sprig of glitter-glued mistletoe on the lid. Maybe even coloured gas with an LED bulb to light up the personalised gift.

and you've only heard him fart twice (accidentally) and you never do should say

Good luck to him. Since I had my twins three years ago I literally can’t help it - my pelvic floor and core are absolutely broken. I obviously try not to do it if at all possible as it’s not exactly pleasant, but it’s not controllable!

You need a proper conversation about where this has come from when he feels comfortable to deliberately and openly fart in front of you. It’s not on really, and after birth you at least have an excuse.

Some men are really into women farting, even in their faces.
One in particular James Joyce, whoever he is.
arlindo-correia.com/joyce.html < WARNING> talks about shite, literally.

I'm not even clicking on whatever Drabarni has linked too, I daren't
Dafuq lol

It’s pretty grim to do it deliberately but you can’t help it if it just slips out. He needs to grow up. Start calling him out on it every time he does it!!!

Tell him to FOTTFSOFTFOSM

But that’s the whole problem - he already does. He only objects when she does it.
Wait.... I have understood correctly what all of the ‘F’s stand for, haven’t I…..

I’m now wondering whether farts would really ‘keep’ in a mason jar...

It’s a fair question to ask, but the answer is a categorical Yes. This poor lady was just one documented victim:

+10 to the bee farter!
AKA Captain BeeFart!!

Sorry but why the fuck have you not challenged him on his disgusting misogyny? If he just didn't like farting in general then what you've said would be relevant but he farts massively in front of you so clearly it is absolute pure pig ignorant sexism.

How can you stand to be with him? I would have absolutely ripped him apart from every angle by now until his utter moronity is completely exposed.

All of you out there who don’t fart in front of your partners - how?! Don’t you get tummy ache? What if you’ve eaten something that makes a lot of gas? Do you keep going out?

I understand we don’t do stuff like farts in public, but, really? a perfectly natural bodily function you only have variable control over? What about a fanny fart? You can’t stop those buggers! Do you pretend it’s the cat?

My nemeses:
Garlic
Roast dinner
The reduced sugar/salt beans.

We say ‘bloody hell, that duck got in again’

No one over the age of 12 in my family or extended family farts in front of anyone. You all sound weird and a bit disgusting.
I’m sorry for those of you who can’t help it because of a medical condition, but what do you do in the workplace? In my experience it’s very rare to hear/smell people doing this at work so presumably most people do manage to control themselves outside of their homes, so why not inside their homes also? Farts belong in the bathroom.
OP’s husband is of course being ridiculous and sexist in saying she shouldn’t do it but doing it himself.

Laughing so much there is a real danger I am going to piss myself in front of DH never mind just farting.
Thanks for the James Joyce link, much better reading than Ulysses

@justasking111 you realise your DH sounds like even more of a truly horrific sexist misogynistic hypocritical ignorant pig than the OPs? Did he time warp here from the 1800s? God help us and the fight for real equality when there are still men alive with such outdated views!!

No one over the age of 12 in my family or extended family farts in front of anyone. You all sound weird and a bit disgusting.

Well thank goodness it’s not you that has uncontrollable wind then. It’s not a very nice thing to begin with, and it’s definitely not made better by spouses or random MNers calling you disgusting.

I’m sorry for those of you who can’t help it because of a medical condition, but what do you do in the workplace? In my experience it’s very rare to hear/smell people doing this at work so presumably most people do manage to control themselves outside of their homes, so why not inside their homes also?
Can’t work these days but if I did I’d have accidental farts there too. That’s literally rhe point of them being uncontrollable.

Farts belong in the bathroom.
Please explain this to my gastric system and messed up pelvic floor. They missed the memo.