To ask why non-parents are here?

[hopityhopity]

I see posters saying they don't have any children, or want any. So if you aren't a parent, pregnant or TTC, why are you here on mumsnet?🤔

It makes me a bit uncomfortable tbh OP. Mostly because anytime women form a space to discuss stuff to do with being a woman, it stops being a space about that very quickly. I don’t want to be on a thread about post-childbirth pelvic floor issues and then have someone wade in with “well from a man’s perspective...” or on a thread about fertility and suddenly have someone saying “I’ve never wanted children...”

I’m in a mums-only fb group and it’s lovely (and so much less judgy/ argumentative than mumsnet!)

I don't understand how a public forum can be a 'safe space' tbh?

I'm very glad to see the OP got their arse handed to them here, and agree with a very early post that asking the question should result in a warning if not a ban

It is asked too often, and has all the hallmarks of Regina George You Can't Sit With Us fuckery.

Because the discussion here is more intelligent than anywhere else I've found.

Someone I am close to, who is a lesbian and has never had the slightest interest in having children and doesn't really even like them, is on here and has been on here long before I came on it or had children.

Her observation about it - -and I totally agree with her -- is that it is one of the most feminist websites out there and a place which truly brings home to women the extent to which they get a raw deal in all aspects of life.

And I totally agree with this. I first ventured onto MN when I had a small baby and was feeling lonely and overwhelmed and it was starting to dawn on me slowly that my marriage was on the ropes.

I read initially the relationships board which slowly but surely confirmed the instinctive feeling I had that something wasn't right in my marriage, and then progressed through many of the other chat boards.

I sometimes post for very specific advice about something, more often than not just read for interest, elucidation and sometimes entertainment.

But the one thing that keeps me coming here is that you know you will get unbiased, unabridged, direct and sometimes uncomfortable responses to moral dilemmas, personal crisis, or just mundane logistical questions, from women who don't have skin in the game.

It pretty much kept my sanity when my marriage fell apart and has guided me through the horrors of internet dating, the challenges of being a single parent and various health issues associated with my DD. Some of it was parenting related but much of it not. And I think 90% of MN would have been of just as much value to me if I hadn't had a child.

I’m in a mums-only fb group and it’s lovely (and so much less judgy/ argumentative than mumsnet

Off you fuck, then. 👋

Maybe don’t get so worried about which sites other people like to visit

@thepeopleversuswork I really wanted to read your interesting comment but half of it is crossed out and it's hurting my eyes to try and read. 🙁

'I’m in a mums-only fb group and it’s lovely (and so much less judgy/ argumentative than mumsnet

Off you fuck, then. 👋'

Love the childfree and some of the men folk who post on here.

When they all go I'm off too.

Can't stand all the boring baby stuff

Because it’s a forum for intelligent women, primarily, on a huge range of subjects. Stick to the barely legible threads about arse wiping or whatever you’re into, and don’t get snarky with the Childfree, childless and other members. You could easily have searched for the many, many identical whiny threads before spamming another one, for fucks sake.

Really baffled at the number of people taking offence at the question. There really is nothing bitchy about it.

Simply because it's a place so many women gather to share their opinions.

Just because a woman is a mother doesn't mean she should be expected to have opinions on only motherhood.

And just because a woman isn't yet / doesn't want to be a mother doesn't mean she should be expected not to have an interest in the opinions of mothers as well as the opinions to those of women without children.

Basically, it's a fuck ton of people exchanging ideas and I love learning about a huge variety of opinions rather than existing in an echo chamber.

Also when it comes to kids, I do want to be a mother but I'm not yet. But please don't forget that even if people don't want kids they can still highly value kids lives - their education, the future our generation is building for them and how to support them best as they tackle all the big changes going on during their lines.

Also you can say fuck and cunt and wankbadger. Lots of reasons really!

I'm not sure it is a disingenuous thing to wonder what brought people with no interest in children to a site called Mumsnet

🤷🏼‍♀️

We all have a mother or lack of one in common .

Really baffled at the number of people taking offence at the question. There really is nothing bitchy about it.

You’re not the one having whether you belong here questioned.

This has been asked and answered many, many times before. It only takes about five seconds of looking at the active threads to see there are plenty that have nothing to do with being a mum.

Livpool

I'm not sure it is a disingenuous thing to wonder what brought people with no interest in children to a site called Mumsnet

Its disingenuous because OP is on the site and can see perfectly wrll that the talk boards have more non-parenting topics than parenting ones!!

If she had never seen MN and a childless or child free friend said she was a member of a forum called Mumsnet, then it could be a reasonable question to ask.

But not when its patently obvious if you are already a member.

@MrsDimmond

I see what you mean and understand (now I am on the site) that there are lots on non-parenting discussions.

I'm not sure I would have joined a site called Mumsnet if I had no children/was not interested in children/childcare, but maybe that it is just me

People have been happily looking up the tv listings in a magazine called the Radio Times for decades!! No one checks if you have a fucking radio

I’m in a mums-only fb group and it’s lovely (and so much less judgy/ argumentative than mumsnet
Off you fuck, then. 👋

I'm not sure I would have joined a site called Mumsnet if I had no children/was not interested in children/childcare, but maybe that it is just me

Well I didn't join until I'd lurked for quite a while and got to know the boards. I didn't assume it would suit me just because it had Mum in the title .

I've lurked on NM and Reddit. Not joined either.

Most people find their way here through googling for an answer to a query. Whether its parental, legal, style, relationship....

I joined it because I was nosey, and childless. Now I am nosey with child, so that makes it ok
Anyone can join, wether they are parents or not.

There are a huge amount of topics covered here! It’s not all children and parenting so I find it interesting from that perspective!

It also strongly and almost daily confirms my decision to be childfree for life!!! Not that I’m in any doubt of course but I’m interested in ‘how the other half live’! I’m like a moth to a lightbulb with some of the stories on here! 😂

PS - there are loads of parents in my main childfree group!!

Anyone read the slogan...
Mumsnet .. for “parents” by “parents”
Just saying

MNHQ have made clear on many occasionally that anyone is welcome here.

Just saying.