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Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

This is utter shameless bragging but I'm not sorry

153 replies

LifeonVenus · 07/10/2019 21:08

Well I am sorry, because I hate bragging if it makes someone else feel a little less, but I hope this is a little bit more about me than inconsiderately not considering anyone else.

My dd has had a tough start in life. Think less than ideal family life, no father, lives with her grandmother etc.

Last week, she messaged me (she's just going into GCSE year) to tell me that she got an award for academic achievement for her 2nd year results. She was utterly ecstatic. I don't think anyone was more surprised than she was, as to me her grades were all over the shop (a mixture between A, B's, C's and a D in Maths).

I suspect it's not that she came third in her year, but it was more that she put in effort, but she is fully convinced she came third and I'm not about to burst that bubble. She just turned 15 and told me 'Mammy - if I could do that with only putting in a little bit of effort - imagine what I could do if I study!'. She's like me in that the carrot works better than the stick.

I'm banned from posting about her on FB, I've no friends here (friends don't really care anyway), so her godmother and grandfather rang her to congratulate her.

She really has had all the odds stacked against her so anything and everything she has achieved is all on her. So I just wanted to say that to someone. Don't know why. I don't have anyone else to tell who wouldn't feel it's bragging or something.

Anyway, just thought I'd put it out there. The encouragement seems to having a brilliant effect on her. I firmly believe in encouragement and praise.

And if anyone wants to tell me I'm a brilliant Mum (I'm the worst Mum on the planet - she doesn't even live with me), then that would be cool too..

Sorry. I usually hate these kinds of posts.

OP posts:
harridan50 · 07/10/2019 21:40

Your daughter sounds amazing. Send her a card to tell her how proud you are of her. Well done sometimes it seems hard but you have done the right things for her. Take care of yourself.

LifeonVenus · 07/10/2019 21:44

Thank you MN. When your heart is bursting with pride and you've nobody to tell, it's hard. Like her first word, her first step. I just told Grandma and Grandpa. It's a bit like that now. I've never had a father with her (apart from conception clearly), so I am sorry for annoying you all with stupid silly inconsequential things about a child you don't know. But thank you all. I really appreciate you indulging me.. x

OP posts:
listsandbudgets · 07/10/2019 21:47

What a lovely post. I can feel pride and joy and love brimming over in it.

Your daughter is going to do so well in life with her attitude and her brilliant mum to guide her through it. Its lovely she wanted to let you know. Well done to her and well done to you

I've got a great big smile reading this thread :)

Dogwalks2 · 07/10/2019 21:48

You’ve made me cry. So happy for you and your daughter. I’m not into social media but I do love mumsnet and this type of post is the reason why.
You are proud of your daughter you get to tell people and you get positive nonjudgmental replies.
Wishing you both all the very best for the future.

CalendulaAndRoses · 07/10/2019 21:52

beautiful post - well done her. You sound really proud and rightly so. I also was really touched by your consideration of other people on this post "if it makes someone else feel a little less, but I hope this is a little bit more about me than inconsiderately not considering anyone else." Whatever your problems (and it sounds like you've had more than your fair share) you sound like a really kind and thoughtful person. Thanks for sharing your lovely news!

category12 · 07/10/2019 21:57

Well done her.

LifeonVenus · 07/10/2019 21:59

Thank you Calendula. I learned very early on what bragging is. If it makes someone else feel bad. So I try damn hard to never brag. I was an A student - you should see me now lol. Hahahaha.
My dd is never going to be straight A's (well she might if she put her ass into it - unlikely), but she's a happy, popular, well adjusted teen so far. Touch wood.
I'm so thankful for all your lovely messages. You didn't need to message. You don't know me or her. But thanks. It means a lot.

OP posts:
user1473878824 · 07/10/2019 22:05

Op! This is so lovely to read! I’m sitting here smiling because I’m so pleased for your daughter.

And she called you to tell you, she clearly doesn’t think you’re a bad parent. Congratulations OP, you must be so proud xxx

mcmooberry · 07/10/2019 22:06

Aw she is amazing, well done her!

OhTheRoses · 07/10/2019 22:08

Well obviously op you have an awesome daughter. She's awesome because she inherited half of herself from you.

May there be lots more good nay, brilliant, days.Flowers

57Varieties · 07/10/2019 22:13

Well done her x and you

CaptainNelson · 07/10/2019 22:17

That's a beautiful story. Well done her, and bask in her reflected glory OP. You deserve it x

Rachelover60 · 07/10/2019 22:18

I think that is great! Well done to her. She will do even better next year.
Flowers for her and Wine for you.

nettie434 · 07/10/2019 22:19

Your daughter sounds brilliant LifeonVenus. Wishing her (and you) all the best for the future Flowers Star

LifeonVenus · 07/10/2019 22:21

She knows I am proud of everything, so I guess she was looking for the bit of praise. Her peers all celebrated with her, so she has more in her life than me I don't know what her Mum's praise means to her. She holds her cards close to her chest. I am happy that 90% of her life now is her friendship group who seem to be her world right now. I'm good for a few quid here and there an 'labels'. Because I live in London, she can claim that I work here, not that I'm unwell. She's in a school that's an international boarding school so that they all don't live at home is normal to her. Why I picked the school.
She's 15 now, changing into the age where it's going to be discos (are they even called that now?) and boys.
I've given her lectures about contraception and condoms but I think she switches off. It's hard when your Catholic antichrist mother is rearing her lol.
She's only 15 so would still be illegal to have sex.
It's so fucking hard having this shit over whatsapp.

OP posts:
SirProjectofThigh · 07/10/2019 22:22

Awwww. This is lovely. Well done both of you Flowers

ContessaLovesTheSunshine · 07/10/2019 22:25

She's done so well! And I can tell you're a good mum, because you're genuinely delighted for her - you're not belittling her achievement, or telling her she could have done better, or otherwise manipulating her emotions so she feels small and you feel big. You're just plain proud of her. That alone makes you a hell of a lot better (as a mother and a person) than many, many other parents out there. You're a Star

Charley50 · 07/10/2019 22:27

A massive well done to your daughter and well done to you for recognising what a great achievement this is for her and for being so proud of her. It's great that she told you and that you care enough for each other to tell each other important things, and especially doing so well when the odds were stacked against her.

maggiecate · 07/10/2019 22:28

You should be proud - it sounds as if you’ve had some real struggles and made some tough choices to give her the best chance, and she’s taken her chance and run with it! You obviously love her to bits and with that behind her I’m sure she’ll go far Flowers

Missymare · 07/10/2019 22:29

Fantastic your daughter has done amazing

LifeonVenus · 07/10/2019 22:30

Wow. Don't think I've ever gotten a star on here before. I genuinely wish I deserved it.

OP posts:
ContessaLovesTheSunshine · 07/10/2019 22:40

Well you do deserve it. Stop being a numpty and accept your star, dammit Grin

user1473878824 · 07/10/2019 22:41

I think it is deserved x

Spied · 07/10/2019 22:52

Fab.
I hope my DC learn resilience and that hard work pays off. Currently my eldest is struggling with his school work and my worry is he gives up too easily and doesn't see how important it is for his future.
I really hope he develops a mindset similar to that of your daughter and puts in the graft.
Inspirational

caringcarer · 07/10/2019 22:55

Your dd sounds amazing and now she has received the encouragement she will do even better in her GCSE's. Good luck to her and the revision books are very good to help her even more.