To ask for a man’s opinion please?

[LoveLifeLaugh]

I’m about 40, slim but not skinny and facially ‘decent’.

I have got to the age where I could easily start worrying about new wrinkles, greying hair and the unforgiving force of gravity.

My natural approach would be to:

• stay slim
• avoid grey hair
• dress in a way that flatters my figure

But then to not obsess about it. To leave the house with a smile and a positive, confident attitude. Is this enough to still be regarded as attractive? I don’t want to nip and tuck myself like so many people I know. But my fear is that people will compare me to these younger-looking, smoother models.

I’m a happy person, full of joy and confidence but is that enough in today’s world?

Thanks for your thoughts.

I'm a happy person, full of joy and confidence

Well you certainly don't sound that way if you're having to come on an internet forum in order to ask men what you need to do to make men find you attractive.

Hi lovelifelive. I'm Male and around 40. I've met plenty of attractive women around our age. Not all of whom are classically beautiful. Many too well made up women dont look as good as they think they do to me. Confidence and curves are much more attractive than skinny and self obsessed.

However the one thing that would turn me off is if you have live life love with an inspirational quote painted on a wall in your house!

My DP thinks you need some self respect.... (man’s POV)

OP, suggest MNHQ amend your thread title to "Men on here; do you want to fuck me"

What about what a young woman wants? Does that not matter, they have their own minds you know, when I was mid twenties I was certainly not attracted to 40yr old men, in early 30s at most. I'm sure most young women want to hook up with their peers as they have more in common.

botox NEVER makes anyone look younger. Fake boobs always look fake and filler just makes a jaw or an entire head look bigger. Facelifts if Katie Price is anything to go by - after 3 - seem to make feck all difference (though admittedly I have seen a few successful transformations but on women in their late fifties). So carry on as you are and don't bother with any of that crap.

To attract a man eat only dust except on a full moon, and then you can gorge on sugary carbs, but make sure you are standing on one leg.
Wear a slim fitting snood over your face and a patch over one eye.
Cultivate an accent, preferably Bulgarian.
Learn to collect seashells with your buttocks.
Ask about him and his hobbies (cycling).and cover your mouth with one hand when you laugh at his joke.
You're welcome

The best thing anyone can wear is a smile & confidence

Be kind

Be interesting

People with grey hair are NOT lesser people !

Nobody is perfect physically or mentally

Love yourself

Oh bloody hell, why do you need a man’s opinion? Don’t you have a personality? Or a fulfilling life? Let me guess...

Here is an example. Two photos of the same beautiful woman at two different stages in her life. I think she’s more attractive in the younger photo and suspect most people would agree. So clearly age/looks do matter.

Yes, CD looks better in the first photo. But I’m the same age as you and unless you had one hell of a hard paper round as a youngster you won’t look anywhere near as old as the second photo for many years yet so it’s hardly a good source of comparison for the point you’re trying to make.

Also, I think she looks around 40 in the first photo and is 💯 % stunning there. I’d fuck her and I’m not even gay.

@Dave234234 sod off.

From your post you are trying to state 'skinny' women are only that size because of volition not naturally. Skinny woman can be curvy too.

So say that you prefer natural looking women who are larger and have a personality. Not that 'skinny' women cannot have a personality.

It might surprise you to learn of natural make up as well. A woman could be wearing a ton if this and you wouldn't notice.

I can't stand some attitudes. The whole point is that she's putting too much emphasis on looks and looks aren't just 'curves' or make up and it shouldn't be linked into self esteem this much.

In my experience, men who start dating in their 40s want a woman who is 25-35. Men in their 50s seem interested in women in their 30s. I think men in their 60s are open to women in their 40

Thoughts on the opening post aside, I've also found this to be true in many cases

You should have posted this on a forum frequented by men. A football or car forum or Digital Spy. You would have an overflowing inbox full of messages from basement dwelling neckbeards, hoping for a crack at a not fat, not ugly 40yo woman.

The stench of desperation is high, particularly after the gushy crush on your hairy boss thread, OP. Don't get botox. Get self-esteem.

Jeez, stop being so nasty to the OP. It's sad that she feels this way but lots of women do and it's not their fault; we live in a shitty society that only values women for their looks; it's quite normal for her to feel like this - I'd say that the majority do.

OP, stop trying to please men and just be yourself. Read The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf. It will make you feel angry about the whole culture of female beauty.

Jesus
This is so depressing.

I don’t want to compete with 25 year olds at all! That time has truly passed. I’m competing with other 40 year old women who are getting their boobs done, faces filled, etc. I’m saying that I don’t want to do that. I want to just be myself.

Who on earth do you socialise with? Where do you work? I work at a university, and I don't have any female getting false tits or facial fillers. Socially, I know most of my friends through sport, and fake tits would just get in the way. However, both groups look pretty good. Who are these people of whom you speak?

In my experience, men who start dating in their 40s want a woman who is 25-35. Men in their 50s seem interested in women in their 30s. I think men in their 60s are open to women in their 40s but I don’t want a guy that old. I have actually found it a lot easier to attract younger men say 27-35.

I think with that approach, you are always going to be scrapping around the dodgy type of men who pretend to be nice but are always looking for the next best thing and treat you accordingly. Your problem is not your looks, but your approach to life and your inherent attitudes. The decent, well educated men who prefer women their own age or older than them are going to be put off you because you will come across as shallow or brittle to them.

Maybe come off online dating and take up a hobby or sport and stop obsessing about meeting men, and maybe you might gradually get to know someone that you could have a relationship with?

Your posts are really awful to read. What a load of nonsense about men and their preferred age groups. Do you think we are all married to men 15- 20 years older than us? Get a grip!

any female colleagues

Apparently all men think differently!

So you could take some 'man' advice here and later discover it was unhelpful.

HotSince82 (really?) Don't be silly emsy, nobody called you unattractive but if you're looking to maintain skin quality, which I gathered the OP was, then running probably isn't the optimum choice exercise wise, all things considered.

Lack of collagen, a sluggish metabolism, smoking and weak facial bone structure (flat cheekbones/bigger nose, square jaw) make you age quickly, not running. Exercise, including running, improves blood supply and will help anti-ageing. Some of these are the luck of the genetic draw, some of these lifestyle related.

All the women I know who run at any level of speed look much, much younger than their counterparts who don't. The movement of running isn't going to age you any more than walking. Utter bollocks.

I generally find that people who come out with those kind of statements don't look half (or even quarter) as good as they imagine themselves to.

QualCheckBot I hope you feel better for getting that off your chest

You're a strange one, OP