WIBU or was she a CF?

[sailorcherries]

We live in a new build estate, with no pavements and a road designed to stop cars from speeding (the road is made up of straight lines constantly changing angle, like a zig-zag).
Every house has a minimum space for 2 cars in their drive, some have room for 3, and the flats have 2 spaces for each.

There are other bays dotted along the estate for visitors and so on. They are not residents only. They are not private.

Every household in the street pays a factors fee for the upkeep.

My family member asked me if they could park in one of the spaces as the train station nearby was full. I said yes. Family member returned to their car which had a 'this is private parking' handwritten note attached and the author of the note came out and verbally harassed them. They are over 20 years my family members senior and were incredibly aggressive. My family member explained that I had said okay and drove off.

The same thing happened today but the note had vague threats of 'reporting to the relevant authorities'. There are no authorities. It's not private property or residents only.

I decided to speak to the neighbour and let them know I had said my family member could park there. Neighbour went tits up and claimed that as she pays council tax and factors fees she can decide who parks there. I explained that I pay those things too and as a resident I can say yes to someone parking there, even though I don't have to. She went off on one a out her not inviting all her family to park there and it being ridiculous. I told her that we don't kick up a fuss when her husband's work can is constantly parked there, ruining the space we also pay for, instead of their drive. Or have we complained when her family have parked all over the road and not the bays. Or when their dog kept running in to our house and out on to the road in front of cars because she can't be bothered getting it. This caused her to look a bit ashen.
I also told her that my family member will be contacting the police if this woman continues to verbally abuse her and if her car gets damaged.
Neighbour called me a "boot" and slammed the door.

Now, I don't normally get involved but I'm not having a middle aged woman become verbally abusive and threatening towards my teenage cousin.
We've also had incident's where residents cars have been vandalised by people passing through the estate to the train station and I don't want her notes causing that grief and damage. You have no idea who she might annoy next.

Husband has said I was daft for discussing, or attempting to discuss, it.

This is the same neighbour who put her bins down the middle of our driveways (joined) because sometimes we used to step on her drive to put the baby in his car seat. Even though she would also step on ours. She also didn't believe that if her bins damaged our cars (a particularly windy few weeks) that she would be liable, given her placement.

WIBU in trying to speak to her or was she just a CF who thinks she can get away with this nonsense because no one tells her she's being ridiculous?

So now it's not even a parking space?!

Even if the parking spaces are owned by the residents / builder, unless there are signs stating resident’s parking only, then parking is up for grabs for everyone surely?

A very crude drawing but essentially -

Black is the road.
Turquoise is the communal green areas
Green are the front gardens/grass owned by properties.
Pink is a house.
Yellow is a driveway.
Purple dot is where cars, at times, park on the road. Where my cousin was parked.

Those bays/areas/inlets whatever you want to call them are part of the road. There is nothing that separates them from the road bar the fact they jut in. There are no parking markings. There are no parking signs. There are no permits, no restrictions nothing.
Those places appear intermittently in the estate and are used by any number of people legally parking, be it visitors or otherwise.
There is nothing in any of anyone's paperwork that gives them any ownership over those areas because they are not designated car parking spaces, they are designated as part of the road.

Tweedledee do it has always been used as parking but, after checking the paper work like a previous poster suggested, they aren't actually classes as parking spaces no.

And yes when she first spoke to my cousin I understand that but then, when my cousin explained the situation she still continue to scream and shout at her. Then crazy NDN proceeded to pin signs to the fences (not even her fence) stating it was resident's only parking. She then verbally abused my cousin again and left a note on the car claiming to have passed her details to 'relevant authorities' when there are none.

You said that residents' cars have been damaged by people passing through the estate to the train station but you're encouraging people to park on the estate ...to pass through to the train station... or is that different because its your family??

Your neighbour's attitude is crap but you're not being particularly considerate either.

Francis maybe speak to our lawyers who issued these documents and tell them that what they have included is not a cadastral map and is indeed a cadastral plan of our unit. Despite it showing the entire estate and surrounding land, it is only our unit.

catwithnohat two cars were damaged. Two other neighbours further down the street who took objection to a car parking there and blocked it in, repeatedly.
Their cars were then found scratched. The general assumption is that they pissed off the owner of the car or someone the owner knows.

I don't want my NDN leaving these notes everywhere and possibly being a target as we live near the space.

Your NDN does not sound like a pleasant person to live cheek to jowl with. On this occasion however, I agree with her. Let your cousin park on your drive.

And I have never heard the word “boot” being used interchangeably with “cunt”. It’s no compliment, that’s for sure, but “cunt” it ain’t.

Look, If she really did scream and shout then yes that's wrong. But it's got nothing to do with you, you don't have the right to give "permission" to park there. It's irrelevant that this was your cousin. It was a commuter as far as the woman is concerned.

Your neighbour is right to try and nip it in the bud before the whole area becomes full of commuters cars.

And you're wrong about the bins!

Suppose it doesn't matter now as your cousin won't need to park there but the high winds could be your next issue!

I think YABU. My mother lives in a gated off road. With 8 houses. Everyone can fit 2 cars on there drive. And occasionally. People park along the road bit. But it forced to move if said person wants to move out of their drive. Other than that she had road parking. Where a maximum of 4 cars can park. She also pays a community fee. For someone to upkeep the gate and the grass etc. The bays are not allocated. However. If I drive over there. I park outside of the gates. Meaning I have to walk 5-7 mins. No problem. Or I park in her drive. She never allows me to park in the bays. As they tend to be used for services men. Postman. Gardener. Electrician. Plus when it’s full of cars. It makes it harder to drive. There no way I would want to park there as I know how inconvenient it can be.

YABU, the relative parking there isnt carrying out any work on the estate, nor is he visiting.

None of the other owners park there either. No do their guests. It’s just the way they do things.

If sonone let someone perk there while they commuted off to work. The neighbours would cause hell.

And again, we've established that those spaces aren't dedicated parking spaces, they aren't owned by any one in particular and are part of the road.
At no point was there ever any residents only parking, dedicated visitor parking or so on. That is just what they have been used as over the 3 years. People who visit houses near these spaces park there. Other houses not nearby have people parking on the road.

Anyone could legally park right outside their house, away from their drive, and it would be as legal as parking in the little inlet where people normally park.

For me the answer is. As it is at my mothers. I park on her drive. If she needs to. She parks elsewhere.

And your mother lives in a gated community.
We don't. We don't live on a road that is private at all. We live in an estate that has an access road from the main road. There are no gates, no private property signs, no parking signs, no residents only signs.

My cousin is, in effect, parking on the road in a way in which her car isn't in the way of traffic. Legally.

If I had started this and said my cousin parked in a way which obstructed no houses or traffic and broke no laws, in my street, and my NDN verbally abused her because of this aibu I think the answer would be different. People are getting hung up over the use of 'parking space' which we've established isn't a space in the deeds, isn't residents only, isn't given over as visitors parking and so on. It is a bit of road.

I checked the deed of conditions.

And the map does not show one bloody unit.
I'm not too sure how many times I can say that to you. It does not show one unit, one plot and so on.

Yes the bloody deed of condition that I read which stated those areas were part of the road. Like I said.

However. I forget that you have also looked at these documents with me and you have also realised that there is not one reference to visitors parking, residents parking, additional parking bays and so on.

Doesn't matter who does and doesn't own it anyway. That's the point you're missing. Your cousin was legally parked but your neighbour is trying to avoid it becoming the local station's unofficial overflow car park. Quite rightly, it's a nightmare on one particular estate in our town and the residents wish they'd acted sooner to put people off.

I see this is another of these “why did OP even bother to post as she is 💯 % convinced she is right” type threads.

You were definitely NOT on a break, OP.

Is the road a private road that you pay maintenance for or a public highway?

We pay factors fees for "grounds maintenance" not road maintenance. The areas in question are classified as part of the road. As I recently realised and have mentioned several times since.

There is no mention of residents having residents only parking, visitor parking and so on. Indeed there are other areas that can be parked on as part of the road, not inlets like these but out the way of traffic that are more obviously part of the road.

And tbh my wibu was about trying to discuss neighbour screaming abuse at my cousin over the matter or whether she was unreasonable in her attitude towards myself and my cousin.
My cousin, legally parked on a road and not on any residents/visitors/regulated/controlled/permit holders only area.
It derailed slightly but that was the original question.

OP, I think you're the one technically in the right - legally and according to the council anyway.

This is more of a general civility issue though. It might be perfectly legal for your cousin to park there for whatever reason she likes, along with anyone else. But clearly the reason those spaces were put there when the estate was being built is to help with access to the households on the estate itself.

Either way, your neighbor does sound like a total knob for the way they reacted, and they are not in the right. But at the same time why make a massive deal out of it? Just tell your cousin to park in your driveway next time.

I didn't make a massive deal out of it.

Chapped the door and asked her about it, she immediately started ranting and raving. I admit I shouldn't have brought up past issues but had got my back up over her also screaming at me but it was to highlight that there was no need to approach the situation in this way.

I am/was annoyed at how she is behaving, as are other neighbours, given this isn't the first time she has screamed at people for parking there for other reasons. Nor do we want her lumping us all in the same boat in terms of these vaguely threatening notes.